Faith in Fiction
by FeistyFox
Summary: She wondered what else there was about him she didn't know. She wondered how a man as hurt as he was could find a place in himself to love anyone, let alone her. Mostly she wondered if there was a reason Regina had put her in an insane asylum, because right now she felt anything but sane.
1. Chapter 1

Unsure if this was the best idea, especially when she was the one insisting on space while they got used to one another, she walked across the street toward his pawnshop. She had seen the light on from her window in her apartment and knew he was too fastidious to leave it on if he wasn't there. Knowing that he only did real magic, important magic, in his workroom she thought it might be safe to interrupt him.

It had been over a week since she'd seen Rumpelstiltskin and it was starting to drive her mad. She wondered how he was staying away. Either he was exerting an amazing amount of self-control or he didn't care about her as much as she thought. After everything they went through she knew he cared, he more than cared, so maybe she shouldn't think so much about this. Maybe she should be grateful he was trying so hard to honor her wish for him to stay away.

Getting to the front door she didn't see him and knocked loud enough for him to hear if he was in the back. There were a long few seconds where she didn't hear anything and began to question herself before the curtain moved aside. She saw his surprise and delight when he spotted her and she gave him a shy smile through the window. "Are you busy?" She asked, knowing he could either hear her with his magic or read her lips.

He shook his head and walked forward and opened the door. The bell rang overhead and she stepped in when he gave her room. "Belle." He said with real pleasure.

"I couldn't sleep." She told him honestly. "Do you mind if I visit with you?"

"I always want to see you." He said, keeping his voce nearly steady. He ushered her to the back. "Would you like tea?"

"Yes please." She answered, feeling herself relaxing with him beside her. He held the curtain to the side and she moved into the office. She saw he was re-beading a pretty necklace at his desk. He moved past her to his tea set and began to prepare them a drink. She sat down on the couch he had shoved into a corner and looked around, noting the small changes he had made since she'd been here last. "Why are you here so late?" She asked.

"It's hard for me to leave a project half done." He said, indicating the necklace.

"Yes, I noticed that about you." She said with a teasing smile.

His lip twitched up as he made her tea just the way she liked it. "Are you enjoying the library?"

"Very much." She replied. "It has some wonderful stories in it."

"It's fortunate you found a new library. I believe you read through most of mine."

"It would take me another lifetime to read through all the books you had there."

"Not with how fast you read." He replied as he set the tea to steep. "A few decades perhaps."

She smiled at him and he glanced at her over his shoulder, his eyes twinkling in amusement. Her smile faded a little. "I never did thank you, for getting me the key, and for the apartment. I should have."

"It was nothing, Belle." He said softly, closing the debate. "You deserve far more than that."

She knew better than to argue with him about what he believed she deserved. It would get her nowhere. Besides, if she were honest with herself she wasn't a good enough woman to dislike his mindset. It was nice, nice for someone to want to take care of her after all this time. At one time she thought she would have fought it, but neglect had left its mark on her no matter how she wanted to deny it. Pushing the thought aside she instead fixated on something that she had been wondering for a long time. "Can I ask you a question?"

"It seems so." He quipped, although she heard the underlying nervousness there.

"Why did you break our deal?"

Frowning, he half turned toward her. "What deal?"

"When you let me go." She clarified. Because, yes he had loved her, but he was still who he was. He didn't let things go, especially what he wanted. It wasn't in his nature and yet after a relatively short time in the grand scheme of things he had let her walk out with no real expectation to ever see her again. "I meant what I said. I meant forever."

"Yes, I know you did." He turned back to the tea.

"Then why did you break it, our deal?"

"Because even I'm not that cruel."

"I wish you wouldn't say things like that." She said softly. "You aren't cruel."

"Oh, yes, dearie I am." He said as the tea finished. Setting his cane over his arm he picked up the tray and brought it to her. He set it on the desk and handed her a cup, which she promptly set to the side as she stood up. He went still as she stopped in front of him. Reaching up she cupped his face and he simply stopped breathing.

"You aren't a bad man." She said softly.

He closed his eyes and reached up to put his hand over hers. "I am." He said softly. "I'm a monster. I've done terrible things. You won't listen to me about it."

"Rumpelstiltskin, I've seen your bad side." She whispered. "It's dark, but not evil."

He let out a slow breath and opened his eyes. "Belle…" She rubbed his cheek, waiting patiently. "I killed my wife." She went as still as he had only a moment ago as a block of ice suddenly formed in her stomach. "She left us, and after Bae was gone and I was changed, I found her by chance. I killed her."

"On purpose?" She asked, her voice choked.

"Yes." He answered. "And somewhere, in some world, her lover is searching for me. When he finds me he will try to kill me, and he'll kill you as well, if he thinks it'll hurt me."

She didn't know how to processes this. She hadn't come here to find more horrors, not when the ones from her own past were keeping her awake for days on end. She had stepped back from him before she realized what she had done and he made no attempt to stop her. "Why?" She demanded in a strained whisper.

She wasn't sure how he could keep looking her in the eye while he talked about this. "Because I am evil and she was cruel. Your father was right, Belle, I am a beast."

"What will you tell your son?" She asked, horrified.

"I won't." He said simply. "I won't tell him anything."

The ice was growing into her limbs. "You'll lie to him?"

For once he didn't bother to twist her words. "Yes. To spare him pain and keep him, I'll lie to him." He watched her watching him, his eyes flickering with something dark and, and sad. "And to keep you alive and away from Killian, I'll tell you the truth."

"You can't fix pain with more pain." She said, feeling helpless. She was trying to claw her way out of this darkness he had just hurled her into with no warning. She didn't know how to process this, how to view him now that she knew, how to forgive him or if it was even her place to do that. "You can't earn forgiveness with deceit. Why are you like this?" She wanted to shake him, and she was sure he would let her. "I thought you were changing. You said you would try."

"I am trying." He said brokenly. "For you I would do anything, but I have moved worlds and ripped apart time and space for my son. I have fallen into madness and darkness more than once. I won't risk loosing him again. I won't risk your life for past sins."

She felt as if she were ripping in two. Tears running down her face and she didn't know when that had started. All she knew was that this, what he was telling her, was the wrong thing. "If you can't risk that….If you can't tell him the truth then you won't ever be his father." His eyes turned dark. "You'll still be the same man he ran away from. You have to stop making wrong choices."

That hit a nerve. Snapping his hand out he flipped the tea tray off the desk. It hit the floor with a crash and she heard breaking ceramics and jumped at the noise. "I won't leave him again!" He snarled.

"No." She said softly. "You'll push him away instead."

"I won't!"

"You will." She said, her heart breaking for him. "The same way you keep pushing me away. You think no one can love you so you push to keep the pain away." He gripped his cane. "Has the pain gone away yet?"

"Enough." He demanded, trying to ward her words away, although she knew even if she stopped now it was too late. This wouldn't leave him easily.

She wouldn't be swayed. "Has it?" He had to deal with this. "Has pushing ever worked?" She kept at it. "Is that why you told me about your wife just now? To get me to leave? To scare me so I won't come back now that I'm settled and can take care of myself?"

"It's what you wanted!" He shouted. "You wanted away from me!"

"I wanted to stop you from hurting me!" She threw back. He recoiled as if she had just shoved a hot poker into his chest. Guilt filled her at once and it was her turn to move toward him. She saw him trying to pull his mask of indifference up again and nearly begged. "Don't do that." She whispered as she got right in front of him. "I'm sorry." She really meant that. "I'm sorry, Rumpelstiltskin." She repeated as she set her hand over his chest. "I'm not brave enough to help you the way you need help right now." Confusion flickered in his eyes around the pain. "I was by myself in the dark too long. I'm sorry." She was trembling like mad. "I forgot how much hurt you had. I wasn't ready to help you. That's why I left. I'm sorry."

"Belle." His voice broke.

"Don't be mad." She whispered pleadingly. "The cup isn't the only thing chipped anymore." Faster than she could track he jerked her into him in a tight hug. Unable to stop shivering she pressed herself tightly against him and hid her face in his shoulder as she clutched at the lapels of jacket. "I'm sorry." She said again.

"Stop, Belle." He said, his voice quavering again. "You aren't the one that should be sorry."

"It wasn't your fault." She said, knowing what he was thinking. "Don't take any more hurt, Rumpelstiltskin. You have more than your share already." In reply he kissed her head. Unable to argue him out of this right now she leaned farther into him, wanting to reconnect with him, unable to think about what he had told her anymore right now. She was horrified, and had come here to feel safe. For her own sanity she pushed the ice away, pushed his past away. She needed him in the now. There was nothing she could do about things he did before they met, before she was born, centuries ago. "I keep waiting for you to take me for a hamburger." She told him.

He let out a strangled sort of laugh and buried his face in her hair. "I wasn't sure you meant that."

"I did." She told him. "I miss you."

A breath shuddered out of him. "You'd be the first."

She let go of his jacket so she could wrap her arms around his middle in a tight hug. One of his hands inched up to cradle the back of her head. They both fell quiet and stood there for a long time, until she stopped shivering and his breathing went from erratic to deep and even. As she leaned against him it occurred to her she must be hurting his leg but he didn't show any sign of it, or of wanting her to let go. Finally, after she didn't know how long, she mumbled into his chest. "Do you want to try the tea again?"

He nodded and kissed her temple, letting his hands slide away from her reluctantly. Wanting him to believe that she wanted to be here she tilted her head up and kissed him gently on his lips before leaving his personal space. The move had caught him off guard and he froze before he could react. By the time he caught himself she was sitting back on the couch and picking up her now very cold tea. She would deal with this new information later, when it wasn't so late and she wasn't so tired. When she wasn't in his presence and had a clear head.

He flicked his hand and the tea set that was still lying on the floor in pieces suddenly righted and repaired itself as it floated back up to the desk. She said nothing about that magic, knowing it would only start another fight and she wasn't emotionally prepared for that. Moving to her he took her cup from her and returned to the tray, fixing her a new cup. He handed it to her and sat down on the stool he used for spinning. He always seemed comfortable in it regardless of how uncomfortable it looked.

"Thank you." She said, trying to regain some normality after that.

He cleared his throat, clearly trying for the same thing. "It's only tea, dearie."

She smiled a little and his shoulders relaxed. "I never understood why you wanted all the sugar and milk and honey on the tray when you drink it plain."

"It looks more presentable." He replied with a shrug.

She sent him an amused look. "Why does it matter if it looks presentable?"

"Ah, appearance always matters."

"No, it doesn't." She said.

His eyes flicked up to her face as he absorbed her meaning. "You, my dear, are one of the few who doesn't believe that, or fall for the charms of the beautiful. You would be amazed what it means to other people. A properly cultivated image has as much power as magic."

She was amused despite herself. Reaching out she caught his tie and tugged at it gently. "I thought you just had a fondness for nice clothes."

"Aye." He said, letting her set the fabric askew, as if it didn't bother him terribly. She knew it did. He hated being rumpled, which she found amusing. Even as an imp he was meticulous about his clothing. Heaven forbid it be wrinkled or have a stitch loose. When he ripped his favorite dragon hide vest one day he had gone into a melodramatic tantrum that she would defy any toddler to outdo. "I do at that."

She smiled at him. "Have you always?"

Something flickered in his eyes. "For a long time I didn't have the option. Once I did I admit I indulged myself."

She was confused. "What?"

"I wasn't always a wealthy man." He said carefully, as if trying to step around the issue.

She watched him with interest. "You weren't?"

"No."

She admitted to some confusion. "I thought you always had magic?"

"Far from it, my love." He grimaced a little. "I was nothing put a poor spinner for a long time. I owned nothing but my wheel and a few rags. Half the time I couldn't afford food."

She cocked her head to the side, intrigued. "Why are you embarrassed?"

"It's not much to brag about is it?" He asked with a sigh before taking a sip of his tea. "Hardly something to entice a princess to my side."

She let out a little laugh. "I'm not a princess." She told him. "I never was. I was a lady."

He sent her a look. "To a spinner there's little difference. With the wealth your family had you might as well have been a princess." She let out a small, amazed snort of laughter. "You find that amusing?" He asked unhappily, thinking she was mocking his past.

"That you though we had money." She replied, correcting him. "Wealthy indeed."

He raised an eyebrow. "You offered me gold to save you village."

"We offered you Gaston's gold." She told him. "I told you it was an arranged marriage."

It was his turn to be confused. "What?"

"I had a title and no wealth, he had wealth and no title. We had been at war for over five years. Our coffers were dry and our people were either dead or starving. Gaston's father was a very successful merchant, but that wasn't enough for his son. Gaston wanted the one thing his father couldn't provide, status. I told my father to offer him my hand."

Rumpelstiltskin absorbed that. "You arraigned your own unwanted marriage?"

"My father never would have. He knew I didn't want Gaston." She felt the old resignation in her belly. "But what is it they say here? Desperate times call for desperate measures? Our people were going to die. I thought that would be all we needed to get your help." He was simply staring at her and she thought it only fair to tell him the rest. "The dress I was in when you came? It was my mother's wedding dress and the only thing I owned that actually fit properly. It was the only thing that I owned that looked new or like the lady I was. I wanted to make a good impression on you. I had heard you liked to play with royalty so I dressed myself up like a plaything." She wasn't ashamed of what she'd done. She wasn't ashamed she had used what she'd known to save her village and her father. "I was almost relieved when you took me with you. That first morning I was at the castle was the first solid meal I'd had in almost eight months." He seemed appalled. "The supply lines broke and there were children in the castle. I made sure they ate. The children and the soldiers needed to eat."

"Your father should have sent you somewhere safe." He said with quiet conviction.

"There was nowhere safe." She pointed out. "And no money to give anyone to smuggle me out even if there was. I wouldn't have left anyway." She watched him quietly. "I think living with you was the safest place I'd ever been." Her eyes danced suddenly as she flashed back to her first day in the kitchens. "Really, it was your larder that made me fall in love with you."

He snorted at that. "I'm not surprised. It was very impressive."

She giggled and he reached over and picked up a plate of cookies that suddenly appeared, offering them with a flourish. She grinned in delight and took one. "Why thank you."

He inclined his head. "My lady." She smiled as she took a bite of the cookie, delighted when she found they had some sort of wonderful brown chunks in them. She let out a hum of delight and looked at it with real interest, trying to work out what this was. "It's called a chocolate chip cookie." He said, answering her unspoken question.

She chewed and swallowed it quickly so she could ask a question. "Chocolate?"

His eyes glittered with sudden playfulness. "A delicacy in this world." He set the plate down and a puff of purple magic surrounded his hand for a moment. When it dissipated she saw he had a pretty foiled box in his hand. He took the lid off before she could read what was written on the top and she saw it was filled with different shaped brown candies that were cradled in pale colored, crinkled paper bowls. Curious, she leaned in and looked at them. After a moment he moved the box closer, a silent offer. Reaching out she picked a square with rounded corners out and took a bite.

She had never tasted anything so wonderful in her life. She thought her eyes may have rolled back in her head and he laughed, a real honest to goodness belly laugh, at her expression. When she finished the treat she couldn't help but ask. "Is there magic in it?" He couldn't think of any other way for something to taste so wonderful.

He laughed again. "No." He set the box in her lap. "It's made with a type of bean, milk, and sugar."

"This is amazing." She said.

He tickled her cheek with his nimble fingers and she picked up another of the treats as she pulled her legs up under her. "I'm glad you like them."

"I don't know who wouldn't like them." She said as she picked up another one.

Leaning in a little closer, he whispered in her ear conspiratorially. "The round ones have raspberries in them."

She dropped the square one she had back down at once. Raspberries had always been her favorite food. She loved summer if for no other reason than she could eat them until she got sick, which she had done more than once. One day Rumpelstiltskin had walked down to the kitchen when she was cooking dinner and found her raiding a large bowl of the small fruits. The dish was enchanted, and whenever the fruit ran out it refilled itself, from where she didn't know. She had been eating them for the better part of three hours, and somehow she knew he could tell the bowl had refilled itself about ten times in that span of time. After that she never walked into the kitchen without a full bowl of them waiting for her, regardless of the time of year it was.

Excited now, having not had raspberries in years, she took a bite out of the round one. Smiling like crazy at the flavor had his eyes twinkling in delight, happy that she was so very happy. When she finally swallowed, unable to savor it any longer without it dissolving in her mouth, she spoke. "Oh thank you."

He smiled wider. "I'm surprised you haven't had chocolate yet. It seems something Ruby would have made sure you tried."

"I keep getting hooked on the same thing for days. It seems all I want to eat anymore are eggs, and last week it was pancakes." It was one of the myriad of odd idiosyncrasies that kept cropping up now that she was out of that cell. She knew, on a logical level, that she could eat whatever she wanted when she wanted now. However, logic no longer seemed to be a very large motivating factor in her life anymore so she ate the same thing until she got sick of it in fear she would never get to taste it again. At one point in time she relied on that logic and straightforward thinking to help her survive in a chaotic world. She ran her father's household with it, and then later the Dark Castle with the same bull headed determination for order that she always had. It meant little or nothing to her that the place was full of erratic and often volatile magic. She had wrestled it into submission, all of it, even Rumpelstiltskin, at least until the last few horrible hours she had been there. Now it seemed after years of static routine that relied on order and logic she had no part in creating, it was her mind that had become chaotic. She shrugged and then made a face, conceding one point. "But nothing with peanuts."

"Why nothing with peanuts?"

"All they ever gave me was peanut butter sandwiches and some sort of watery green soup. I can't even stand the smell anymore. It makes me sick to my stomach."

Reaching over he plucked three candies out of the box and tossed them in the trashcan nearby. "You won't want those then." She appreciated that and smiled before picking out another one. She decided she also liked that he hadn't had a horrible reaction to her mentioning the asylum this time.

She simply kept talking, wanting that to be the new norm. "I don't think it helps that I'm always eating over at the inn either. I can't cook here. None of the machines work properly and I set that box thing on fire one night even though I read the instruction manual." She was annoyed with that, annoyed that she couldn't wrestle the thing into obedience.

"What box?"

She tried to recall the name of it. "The micro…micro…"

"Microwave." He supplied.

"Yes, that." She agreed as she ate another piece of candy.

"Would you like me to show you how everything works?" He asked.

She looked up at him. "Really?"

He watched her seriously. "If you'd like."

"Yes, please." He smiled a little again, as if he had been afraid she would lash out at him for that suggestion. "When did you learn to cook?"

"I had twenty-eight years to work it out." He replied. "I find it less unpleasant than I imagined. It's a bit like making potions."

"Hmmm." She replied playfully as she finished off a fourth chocolate. Thinking that was more than enough, because she suspected she would eat the whole box if she didn't set them aside, she put the lid back on and sat it on the table beside the tea. "You are rather good at it."

"Am I?" He asked in a pleased sort of way.

"You are." She said as she uncurled herself. She thought maybe she could sleep now. She felt settled. "Thank you for tea. I think I should leave before I fall asleep on this couch."

He took that gracefully, which she appreciated. He stood up with her the way that was customary from their world. "I'm glad you came." He said sincerely.

She smiled at him. "Me too." Taking his hand she squeezed it shyly. "Maybe we could go get hamburgers this weekend?"

"Yes." He agreed at once.

"I could meet you here? Saturday afternoon after I close the library?" She thought that would be enough time to process, enough time to forgive and think over what she'd learned tonight, because she was going to need to do that before she saw him again. She was going to need to understand how this fit, how to accept his past, one that appeared to be far darker and more complex than she had suspected.

"I'll be here." He said, walking her to the front door. Unlocking it he held it open for her and she hesitated in the doorway for a moment, unsure of how she should say goodbye. He settled it for her. Reaching up he ran his knuckles gently over her cheek. "Goodnight, Belle."

She smiled shyly at him again. "Goodnight, Rumpelstiltskin."

She indulged another second of him touching her before she slipped away. He watched her as she crossed the street and turned around a corner toward her apartment. Returning to her apartment that was over the library she unlocked the side door and walked up the inner steps quickly, hating the narrow space more than she could say. Unlocking the door quickly she stepped into the apartment, which was about as big as the rooms she'd had when she lived with her father so long ago, and slipped her shoes off. Leaning back against the door she let out a low sigh and wondered if she could really make it five days before she saw him again. She wondered what else there was about him she didn't know. She wondered how a man as hurt as he was could find a place in himself to love anyone, let alone her. Mostly she wondered if there was a reason Regina had put her in an insane asylum, because right now she felt anything but sane.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Waking up with a start she gasped as she fought her way up out of another nightmare. She was covered in a cold sheen of sweat and her blanket was tangled up around her ankles where she had kicked it down her body. It took her several seconds to work out that she was in neither a cell nor the asylum and tried to catch her breath. Glancing around all she saw was her cozy sitting room and tried to relax. It helped that she always kept a small desk lamp on at all times. It also helped that she slept out here now, on the couch.

Her bedroom, as lovely as it was, as comfortable a bed as she must have, terrified her. She had gone in it twice since she moved in almost three weeks ago now. The first time had really been her downfall. As she had explored the place she had gone about opening the windows to let in some fresh air. She was terribly fond of fresh air now and everything seemed better with open windows regardless of where she was. Even when she was with Rumpelstiltskin she had kept at least one window open wherever she was in the house. He hadn't said anything about it and she wondered if he had even noticed the behavior in the few days she was with him, especially with the weather being so nice.

So when she got to the back of the apartment with its one bedroom she had pushed the pretty yellow curtains aside and opened the glass panel. No sooner had it slid up and she locked it in place than a strong wind blew through and caught the door. It had slammed shut from the force and the sound and sight of it had thrown her into a panic the likes of which she had never experienced before. She nearly fell over the bed as she raced to the wood panels, terrified it had somehow locked and she would never get out again. When she got to it her suddenly sweaty palms had slipped over the round metal knob, reducing the friction and making it harder to open than it should have been. The few extra seconds it had taken her to get it open felt like small, terrifying life times. When she finally managed it she all but fell out of the room, scrambling away as if the room would grab her and suck her back in.

It had taken her an hour to calm down again and for nearly a week she hadn't gotten within five feet of the doorway, skirting around it when she needed to get into the bathroom. The idea that she could get out the window didn't occur to her until hours later when she was thinking properly again. On the sixth day it had started to rain so hard that she had no choice but to go in again and shut the window for fear that the water would ruin something, the floors were wood after all and if the floor caved in she would tumble straight down into the stacks, no doubt destroying several books and the furniture in the process. It had taken all her courage to do it, as well as a thick Atlas placed against the bottom of the door to keep it pinned to the wall so there was no chance of it closing again. Her second and final trip inside had been even swifter than her first. She practically sprinted to the window, closed it, flicked the latch in place, and run back out again.

Hating herself for being unable to stand the room did nothing to actually get her in it. Why this was a problem she didn't know because she had no trouble at all with Rumpelstiltskin's bedroom. Of course, it had been bigger, markedly so, and well, he had been there with her. Shutting her eyes she tried to push that back. She wasn't ready to revisit the idea of sharing his life that way. It hurt too much, knowing what it could be like for them, and maybe one day they would have that again, but for right now she wasn't ready and neither was he.

Taking a deep breath she told her body to relax as she opened her eyes again and looked up at the ceiling. There was no reason to fall into these thoughts right now. Today was going to be a good day. She forcefully reminded herself that any day outside of a prison was a good day anyway, so this was going to be a wonderful day. Today they were going to go get hamburgers. Letting the large lungful of air go she sat up and pushed her wild mane of hair back out of her face. Outside the sun was just starting to rise and she could hear the doves that nested under the eaves cooing happily at the dawn. Just under that she heard little cheeps and smiled at the thought of the chicks.

She had been watching the nest since she first saw it a day or so after she moved in and had been delighted when she came back from the library one evening and saw three delightfully ugly little baby birds where there had once been three pale colored eggs. The mother, instead of trying to chase her back as she poked her head out a window to see them, had preened proudly and lifted her wing so she could see better. She was starting to wonder if people were the only thing the curse brought over here because from what she read, and of course she had read about nesting birds the moment she saw the eggs, she knew she should have been attacked to keep her away. Instead, the bird seemed to be able to tell she was delighted and tried to share her joy the way the messenger dove's had back at home.

Standing, she picked up her quilt, one that had been sitting on the arm of the rocking chair in the corner when she got here, and began to fold it neatly. As she did she once again noted all the things in the apartment and really wished Rumple would have let her thank him properly instead of brushing it off. She knew all of the things here, which had been in place when she first walked in, had come from him. It wasn't just because she knew him, knew he would want her comfortable as well as offer things as a silent material apology, which was much easier for him than any other kind, but she recognized nearly everything from the Dark Castle.

The whole bedroom set had come from a room on the fifth floor of his estate, as if he had plucked it up and set it down from there. The couch she was sleeping on had come right from her suite of rooms he had given her a week after she went with him, once he had a slight sliver of trust that she wasn't going to run or had grown tired of her smelling of straw from the dungeon, and the rocking chair had been shoved in a corner of a room filled with his gold spools and an odd assortment of fiddles and violins. He didn't play either of those things so why he needed well over sixty of the stringed instruments she didn't know. Sometimes it was better not to ask. All the other things, with the exception of the odd machinery from this world, she had seen before. The rugs, the bookshelves, at least half the books, all of which were among her favorites from their last world, the small table in the corner, a vase… the list went on and on. She couldn't tell if he had been trying to make her comfortable with familiar objects, if this was all he had on hand to furnish the place on short notice, or if it was a not so subtle gesture that she belonged back with him and she was hoping she would get the hint.

Putting the quilt back over the arm of the chair she fluffed the pillow back up so no one noticed the impression on it and set it upright on the end of the couch, as if she ever actually had visitors that would notice. Yawning tiredly she went to the hall closet, which she was sure was supposed to be for either coats or oddities she had nowhere else to put, but instead held her wardrobe, which had appeared in four neatly packed boxes an hour after she got here. He must have sent them with a spell so she wouldn't need to come get them. It was both thoughtful and sad, and still reeling from the wind incident she had simply put everything in the extra closet out here so she wouldn't have to fetch them from the room. She saw no reason to move them now anyway.

Picking out an outfit and under garments she went into the bathroom and cleaned her teeth, washed her face, and tried to get her hair in order. It was becoming increasingly disorderly and she really wasn't all that skilled at dealing with it. As little as they had at her father's castle he had insisted she have a ladies maid. It was one of the few things they argued about. It was utterly frivolous when they could barely afford food for their people, but he had shown his own stubborn streak on the matter and eventually she had thrown her hands up and let him be. The result was she had someone to help her dress and keep everything neat, as well as making her utterly incapable of dealing with her wayward locks. Glaring at them in the mirror she finally just grabbed at them and tied them back with a ribbon. At least now it was out of her face even if it looked like a puffy brown cloud of destruction.

Grumbling to herself about that, and enjoying that she could grumble about something so utterly insignificant, she slid into a pale green dress with an odd sort of lined pattern that she favored. Yes, Rumpelstiltskin certainly did have a fondness for clothes and he didn't bother to curtail the impulse when it came to her. She thought it very possible he enjoyed dressing her up even more than himself, and how he could guess at her sizes, which were a ridiculously complex matter in this world, was beyond her when he took no measurements of her figure at all. Regardless, the clothes were beautiful.

Leaving the bathroom, which was the only small room she found she could enjoy she went into her kitchen and gathered up things for a sandwich. To her delight her new food of choice, which she had latched onto two days ago, didn't need to be cooked at all, simply put in cold to keep it fresh. Making a turkey and cheese sandwich with lettuce and mustard she sat at the small table shoved in a corner of her kitchen and ate quietly as she watched the sunrise from the window. Soaking in the sight she enjoyed her breakfast, savoring the taste of it, and suddenly got her very first houseguest. The soft sound of wing beats was there a moment before one of the doves, the male she noted when she saw the dark tips of his wings, landed on her windowsill. She smiled at him. "Good morning." The bird cooed at her, watching her with little bobs and quirks of his head. "Would you like breakfast?" She asked, tearing off a piece of crust and standing up slowly. Edging to him so she wouldn't frighten him she crumbled it up and laid the pieces out on the windowsill before backing away again.

The bird let out another coo and started to peck at the bread. Pleased with herself she went back to her own half eaten meal to finish. The bird placidly ate with her, and when she was finished she made a second sandwich for her lunch and then cleaned up her mess. Putting the extra food away she cleaned her plate and the knife she had used and set them in the drying rack to be put away when she came back. Before she left she stood by the sink and drank a glass of water, which she got from the tap, a lovely invention, and finished watching the world come awake. When it was up, and she started to hear people moving about outside she washed her glass and went to start her own day.

Putting on a pair of shoes she grabbed her key, lunch, and small bag that held her money and a spare ribbon for her hair. Stepping gingerly out the door she locked it behind her and then hurried out of the closed in stairwell and into the openness of the library. Putting her things under the welcome desk in a drawer she began to open everything up. It had taken her over a week to get the place in order. A solid week of cleaning, organizing, and mending books that had been too long neglected. When she was finally done and had opened the place she had been pleased and delighted when others started to come, as happy with the abundance of books as she was.

Her biggest supporter had been Ruby. The other woman had been an unexpected and wonderful surprise. She had been a long time without a real female friend and found that the other woman, who was spunky, nice, and out spoken was like a soothing balm on raw, blistered skin. The first day she had brought her a basket of muffins in celebration, taken one good look around, and nearly hugged her to death. That had given her the courage she needed to deal with all the new faces and voices that she was assaulted with that day as people began to filter in, intrigued by anything new in this little bubble of a town they were trapped in.

The townsfolk had been coming in at a steady trickle after the initial burst, which was honestly easier for her to deal with than all of them at once. There were, however, two noticeable absences. Neither Rumpelstiltskin nor her father had come in, leaving her alone as she had demanded. While her wounds from the spinner were starting to close with the help of time and understanding, she had yet to speak with her father. In some ways, a lot of ways, his betrayal had hurt far worse than that of her almost lover.

Rumpelstiltskin had gone a disturbingly long time alone, of that if nothing else she was sure. As much as he loved her, as deeply as he cared, for all his terrible cunning intelligence, he had not one iota of a clue as to what to do with her. She was an enigma too him, although she had never thought herself complex or any more special than the next woman. However, to him, she was a rarity of unequal match. Someone that loved him, and he had been a long time without that. So when he balked at sharing with her she grudgingly understood, as frustrating as it was to deal with. True, she had left his home, but words spoken in the heat of the moment had been rash and fueled by too much anger. She had held in her anger so long she was nearly numb to it, but with her fear up some of it had snaked out and struck the closest things in range.

Her father though, that had damage her deeply. She had literally given up her life to keep him safe, would have done it over and over again if need be, and yet he couldn't even give her the time to understand what she felt, or the time to tell him what had happened in the long stretch they had been separated. He hadn't even asked what happened. She had wanted to see him so badly. She had missed him in a way that he couldn't fully explain, and in under a minute of a reunion that should have been nothing but happiness and joy, one she had dreamed of for decades, he had betrayed her. He had tried to make her what she was when she was under the curse when he had no idea what the magic had done to her mind. He didn't comprehend what she would have reverted to and she shuddered at the thought as she unlocked the front door and propped it open with a spare bookend.

She didn't want this division between them. She loved her father, the only parent she ever remembered having short of a few hazy memories of a pretty woman singing to her, but she was afraid he would try to send her over that line again. Her luck had never been overly abundant and she was sure if it happened a second time Rumpelstiltskin and his magic wouldn't be there to save her. And even if her father didn't do that again, didn't try to control her or decide her fate for her, she saw little hope of him ever accepting the man she had picked as her partner, if one could call falling in love a choice. Regardless, she knew that she wouldn't be able to stay away from her father anymore than she could Rumple. Eventually she would need to go and settle things with him one way or another, but she supposed that could wait for tomorrow, or the day after.

She had barely turned back to go inside when she heard a giggle followed by a little girl dragging the young should be prince after her toward the doors. She knew who he was only because she said his name. "Come on, Henry!" She half begged and half demanded. "I want a book!"

The boy stumbled after her, having little choice with her hanging onto the sleeve of his sweater so tightly, and she suppressed a laugh at the sight. She guessed the two were about the same age and it was clear that while Henry, who she had heard a great deal about but never seen before, was at a loss on how to escape nicely. She wondered if he really wanted to with the way he was looking at the girl. He looked like a confused and love struck puppy. "But, Paige, I'm supposed to be at the stables."

"It'll only take a minute!" She insisted as she dragged him forward. "I'll help you with your silly horse chores when we're done. This is more important." She smiled when the little girl stopped them both in front of her. "Good morning." She said sweetly, and she couldn't help but connect with any girl that found books more important than horses.

She couldn't help but return her bright smile. The girl, Paige apparently, was all sunshine and eagerness. "Good morning." She replied. "What sort of book do you want?"

"_Alice in Wonderland_." She replied promptly.

She tilted her head a little. "You know, I've never heard of that one, but I'm sure it's here somewhere. Let's go find it."

Henry frowned at her as they walked farther in. "How can you have never heard of it? Everyone says you're the new librarian."

"I'm afraid I'm rather new to this world's literature. I haven't gotten around to reading that one yet." She guessed that this was a children's book and headed toward that section. "Do you know the author?"

"No." Grace answered. "But my daddy is in it and I want to read it."

This was not an unusual request. There were any number of people who wanted to either read or re-read their tales now that they remembered who they were. She had seen every reaction from hysterical laughter to a near psychotic break down as the residents of Storybrooke found out how this world perceived them. She had skimmed through a few of the books she knew were about people here, including Snow White and her husband, and Ruby and her grandmother. She had yet to find out how true the stories were, but she guessed they were at least half right in most cases. "I can see why you might be interested then." She said encouragingly as she changed courses to go to the card catalog. "You said it's called _Alice in Wonderland_?"

"Yes."

Nodding, she began to scan through cards quickly. She found what she wanted and memorized the place the card specified. "Found it." She said brightly. The girl giggled, jumping up and down excitedly as she held onto her friend. She took them to the location and in short order found the book and led the girl to the front desk. "You don't have a library card yet do you?" She asked, knowing she had never seen this girl before.

"No." The girl said. "Do I need one?"

"You do." Picking up a sheet of paper she handed it to the girl with a pencil. "Fill that out and when you come back to drop the book off I'll have it ready for you." She loved the idea of library cards. Ruby ha spent two hours teaching her how to work the program on the computer and then how to use the laminator. Once she got the hang of it and how convenient it was to keep track of everything she had embraced the whole idea. She also sort of loved using the laminator a little too much. For some reason it made her giggle happily every time it worked. Grace grabbed the pencil eagerly and started to fill out the short form, pausing when she got to the address line. She gnawed on her lip and she leaned forward to try to help. "Is something wrong?"

"No, my papa found me when the curse broke and I moved to his house with him. I'll remember the address in just a second." She closed her eyes and concentrated and Henry helped.

"It's on Forest Drive."

"Oh!" That set her memory off and she filled it out quickly. As the girl worked she read the form upside down, being sure she didn't miss anything. As she watched the girl looked up at her again. "Should I give my real name or my fake memory name?"

She had an answer to that too, having encountered the problem already. With all the other paperwork in town having everyone's fake names it seemed easier to stay on the trend until the town decided to overhaul everything. She had settled on that quickly and then stayed consistent. "Your fake memory name." The girl nodded and wrote Paige down, and she couldn't help but ask. "What's your real name?"

"Grace." She answered as she wrote her phone number and then asked a third question. "Do I count as a minor? Or is this section just for dwarves?"

She grinned, loving that question having not heard it before. "In this case anyone under sixteen."

Nodding, the girl began to fill out information on her parents so she could contact them in case a book was late. Figuring she was nearly done she opened the computer program, being sure to go through all the right steps to make it work, and the girl finished. She marked the books inner cover with her date stamp to have it checked out properly and handed it to her. "Here you go. I hope you enjoy it."

"Thank you!" She said happily.

"You can have that for two weeks, okay?"

"I understand." Paige said as she realized Henry was looking at her adamantly. She smiled at him too and picked up the form. Paige grabbed Henry again and spun him around. "I thought we had to go to the stable?"

"Oh, oh yeah." He said, shaking his head. "You'll like my horse." He boasted.

Chuckling at them she was about to sit down when something caught her eye on the form. She jolted and did a double take. Then she called at the girl. "Grace!" They both paused and the girl looked a question at her. "What- what's your father's name?"

"Jefferson Hatter."

The air blew out of her body. "Jefferson?" She asked in shock. "He's tall with brown hair? He has a scar on his neck?"

Henry was suddenly wary of her, stepping half in front of his friend. "Why do you care?"

"He helped me." She answered, and it seemed she was so shocked she convinced the boy. "He saved my life." And that was more true than not. Once the curse broke she really wasn't sure how long she would have been kept alive before Regina found a useful time to murder her.

The girl's eyes went wide. "My papa saved your life?"

"Yes, he did." She told her.

"Oh wow." Paige, or Grace, was now both pleased and proud, as if she had never expected such news of her father, but now that she had it couldn't believe she had ever thought him anything but a hero.

Henry was simply curious now, his dark eyes shinning eagerly. "What's your name?"

"Belle." She told him. "Belle French here in this world."

The boy sucked in a sharp breath. "You're _Belle_? _The_ Belle?"

She gave him the oddest look. No one had ever been overly interested in who she was except Regina when she had kidnapped her, and that was really about Rumpelstiltskin, not who she was. Her family never had enough clout to cause a stir when she was mentioned and she had no reputation to speak of. Even here it appeared no one really knew her, knew of her connection with a man they feared so much, or where she had been for all but the last few hours the curse had been in place. Short of Ruby no one was interested in finding out either. "Do I know you?"

The boy raced back to her. "You're in my book!" He said excitedly. "The one that told me all about the curse! You're the one that fell in love with the beast! I thought you were dead! The book said you were!"

She was baffled. "What book?"

"The _Once Upon a Time_ book." He told her, although that cleared up nothing at all.

Paige trotted back over. "She's really Belle?"

"Oh yeah!" Henry assured her. "I see it now! Did you have a gold dress?"

Taken fully aback she nodded. Paige sighed longingly. "Oh, you have the most wonderful story."

"Me?" She asked. "I have a story?"

Henry nodded eagerly. "It's called _Beauty and the Beast_."

Paige was in agreement. "It's my favorite princess story." She informed her. "Was the beast really hairy and horrible?"

"Hairy?" She asked, mystified.

"And did the clocks and candlesticks sing?"

"What?" She'd never heard of such a strange spell. "No."

"That's the fake story, Paige." Henry told her. "Not the real one." He turned his eyes back to her. "You had one of the stories without a full ending. It never said what happened to the beast and it said you died, but you aren't dead at all. Who is the beast by the way? I could never figure it out."

The little girl would not be swayed. "But surely he turned into a handsome prince when she broke the spell."

"I don't know." Henry said, and they both looked at her. "Did he?"

"I never… I never broke his spell."

"Oh." Paige said with real disappointment.

Henry wasn't swayed. "Of course she didn't, the story wasn't over." He looked back at her. "Let me know how it ends won't you?"

"I…"

"Henry, maybe your book will tell you when it's done." The girl suggested.

His eyes widened. "Magic!" This time he grabbed her. "We have to go see if anything showed up! I didn't even think of that! I haven't looked at it since the magic came back here!" He dragged her out and they were gone as quickly as they came. She was left standing there with a sheet of paper covered in childish writing in her hand and more questions in her head than she knew what to do with. Glancing down she saw the address and wondered if Jefferson might have any answers.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Not a minutes after Henry and Paige left she was back at the card catalog. Her fingers flew through the thick, yellowing paper at an amazing speed as she searched for her book. After several minutes of searching she found out where it was and headed toward the back corner. When she got to the spot it was supposed to be she found nothing, not even and empty space on the shelf where it could have been removed from. She searched over the entire bookcase and the one beside it in case it had been misfiled, but it wasn't there. Not one to be easily defeated she went to her computer and typed in the name of her tale with slow, steady jabs at the grey keys. She knew there was some sort of special way to use the odd jumbled letters on the board, but she wasn't sure how and Ruby hadn't had the spare time to show her. It took her a long time to put what she wanted on the screen, but she was persistent in her search for the letters.

When the full title was in she hit the enter button and the computer told her the same thing the card had. It also told her that no one had checked out the book. Frustrated, she sat there for a moment before something else occurred to her. Deleting the entry she once again began to type with meticulous care. When Rumpelstiltskin's name was in she hit the enter key again. The computer threw up several search results. There was one book with his name as the title and it also directed her to a book that was a collection of fairytales. Memorizing the places she went to the stacks indicated and was once again dismayed to find the books missing.

Suspicious now she returned to the computer and was about to delete the entry entirely when she spotted a small red flag under the second title. Ruby had told her that it was a link to extra information that wouldn't fit on the screen the way it was set up in ordered columns. Using the little rodent on the desk she moved it until the arrow was over the red flag and clicked its left ear. A small bubble of information appeared and she cocked her head to the side as she read it out loud to herself. "B level storage." She had no idea what that meant and glanced around. "What's B level storage?"

Wondering if the computer could help her anymore she went back and typed 'B level storage' into the search bar. The computer hummed for nearly a full minute before the screen blinked with hundreds and hundreds of more titles. All of them indicated they were in B level storage. Frowning, she stood up and began to go around the library searching for it, although she was sure she hadn't seen anything labeled that way, and equally sure there was nowhere here that hundreds of books were hiding. Sure enough, two hours and several patrons later and she was as baffled as she had been when she started. Not liking that one bit she put her hand on her hip and glared about as if the building were to blame for her confusion. At a loss she finally returned to her desk and sat there thinking about it for the better part of an hour. She was so distracted she forgot all about her lunch and dragged over the book she had started last night, burying her nose in it to distract herself from a mystery she couldn't solve at the moment. Eventually, it was her growling stomach that brought her back to reality.

Jumping a little she shook her head and glanced up at the clock. It was now just before three. It was nearly time for her to close, since she didn't stay open late on Saturdays. Apparently according to Ruby that was how it should be, with Sundays off altogether on top of it, so she got up and shelved the few books people had brought back before closing up. Being sure everything was secured and locked she grabbed her bag out of the drawer, left the sandwich, and went outside. Locking the door carefully behind her, and finding a great deal of power in being able to lock something instead of being locked up, she walked toward his shop.

She had picked to go out Saturday on purpose. She knew she would close at about three and also knew that was a time of day when there was a lull at the dinner. While she had a very strong fondness for Rumple she knew she was in the drastic minority about that. She thought it might be best to go out in public and eat with him when there was less of a chance of putting him in a room with a bunch of people that might have a problem with him, or well, try to lynch him, which would no doubt result in him loosing his temper and several people being cursed. No, better to start drawing him out a little at a time to avoid such things and allow people to get used to seeing him more often. She hoped he didn't pick up on that, because she was sure he would make something of it, and he simply thought it was a convenient time for her.

A few minutes later and she opened the door to the shop and spotted him standing behind the counter looking into a large black box, nearly a small trunk. It had been five days now since she'd seen him and she felt, if not better about what he'd told her, at least able to handle the information. She thought it would be some time before she really knew what to think about it, but at least she no longer felt filled with ice and sick to her stomach. Glancing up he smiled when he saw her. "Belle." He always said her name like a cross between awe and a prayer, no matter how he tried to control his voice. "I didn't expect you so early."

She wasn't really buying that. As she walked inside she sent him a look that told him she wasn't fooled. "I don't think you were really expecting me at all."

"Yes, well…" He closed the box. "It seems I was mistaken."

She raised an eyebrow. "I hope that doesn't mean you've made other plans."

"No." He said at once.

"Would you like to go now?" She asked. "I haven't eaten since this morning."

He jumped on that at once, afraid to loose the opportunity. "Of course."

Pleased she had managed this so easily she hoped her bet on the inn being empty was right. He walked around the counter and held the door open for her as she exited. Following her he closed the shop up, locking it with a key and no doubt magic on top of it. When he was satisfied they started to walk toward Granny's at an easy pace. She wasn't in a hurry and he was quietly and discreetly basking in her company. She refrained from looping her arm with his, although on some level she very much wanted to, and instead kept step with him. "How was your week?" She asked, thinking small talk was a good way to go.

"Rather uneventful." He answered, although she saw a slight upturn of his lips that told her that wasn't true.

"Was it really?" She asked.

"Well." He shrugged. "I got to heal our lovely Doctor Whaler. I never have had someone carry his own arm to me in a cooler."

She shook her head a little. She didn't know what a cooler was but understood the rest of it. "Wait, what?"

"Didn't you hear what happened?" He asked. "I thought it was all over the town by now."

"I heard a monster got loose and that someone was hurt. No one told me his arm had been taken off."

Rumple shrugged. "He was playing with forces he knew better than to toy with."

"So you think he deserved to have his arm ripped off?" She asked.

"I think he needed to learn a lesson he should have learned after his first botched attempt to bring the dead back to life." When she stopped dead at that he came to a halt with her. Seeing her alarm he soothed her easily, putting the tips of his fingers on her back and urging her forward. "The monster is dead, again."

"I thought that was impossible. You said that was impossible when I was with you."

"I suppose it depends on how you define impossible."

"That doesn't make sense." She said as they turned the corner and the inn came into view.

"He brought the body to life, and some superficial personality and memories, but you can't infuse a soul back in a body once it leaves it. That goes beyond any power that one can manipulate. A soul is the one truly unique thing in all the worlds. When you add on the excruciating pain and confusion of the being he jolted back to the land of the living it's hardly a blessing."

"That's horrible." She said.

"As I said, he should have known better."

"You said he'd done it before."

"He had." They had gotten to the door and he held it open for her. She stepped in and Ruby grinned at her from where she was sweeping something up. The smile fell when Rumpelstiltskin followed her inside. The waitress went instantly on alert, her nostrils flaring, and she smiled at Ruby lightly, trying to sooth her, as she went to a booth at the back. Rumple was pleased with the choice and settled himself so his back was to the wall and he could see the entire room. The only other person here was the old carpenter, who was staring blankly out the window and paying no mind to them at all. When they were settled he continued. "From what I understand he brought his brother back to life in the world he came from."

"The world he came from?"

Before he could answer Ruby slid up, sending her a pointed glance as she spoke. It was not lost on her companion. "Can I get you something to drink?"

"Ice tea please." She requested.

Rumpelstiltskin spoke with calmly. "Ice water." Ruby nodded and left, sending her another worried glance. "Your friend seems concerned." He said dryly.

"You scare people."

"I know." He answered without concern. "Does that bother you?"

"You scared people before and it didn't bother me then. Why would it now?"

"Things change." He said easily, his eyes half lidded.

"For someone who knows me as well as you I would think you would know better than to think that what other people think and feel about you would change what I think and feel about you."

"You are a marvelous creature, dearie, but sometimes you do lack all good sense."

Her lips curled up. "I can hardly deny it." She wasn't about to tell him off for pointing out faults she was very aware she had. Shaking his head, and no doubt making several elaborate and convoluted plans to keep her safe from herself he watched her fondly. The look had her nearly forgetting about Whaler, but she managed to grab at the thread of thought. "You really put his arm back on?"

"Yes." He agreed. "Easier to deal with than him bleeding all over my floors."

"Rumpelstiltskin." She half sighed and half scolded. Impressed that his magic could so something so very amazing despite herself.

He chuckled at her reaction and Ruby came back over with their drinks. She smiled at her and leaned toward her friend eagerly. "I want to try a hamburger."

Ruby, always happy to indulge her inquisitiveness when it came to food, relaxed. "With or without cheese?" Unsure, she looked between her and Rumpelstiltskin.

To her shock they both answered at once. "Cheese."

She grinned as Ruby jumped and he rolled his eyes. Her friend tried to get this back on track, falling back on habit in order to ignore the anomaly of having Rumple in here. "For you, Mr. Gold?"

"He's getting one too." She told her. "I won't go into this venture alone."

"Cheese and no tomatoes, thank you, dear."

"All right. I'll be back with those in a few minutes."

She walked back to the kitchen and she found a brand new set of questions on a totally different topic. "The food here is so different. Do they eat cheese on all types of pork?"

He looked at her blankly for a moment. "Beef. We're eating beef, not pork."

Her eyebrows drew together. "A hamburger is beef? A _ham_ burger?" She separated the word so she was sure she wasn't saying it wrong.

He smiled. "Yes, it's ground beef shaped into a patty."

"That's ridiculous." She said firmly. "It says ham right in it. That's just…" She searched for a good term. "False advertising." He laughed at that, the sound having Ruby leaning her head out the small window of the kitchen and Granny, who had been stepping out with a her records book stopping dead. If Rumpelstiltskin noticed he didn't show any sign of it. Encourage by that she continued on. "Next you'll tell me the cheese you both thought I should have is actually a chicken derivative or some such nonsense."

"No."

"Is it lettuce painted yellow as some sort of disguise?"

He was still smiling. "Just cheese, dearie."

She narrowed her eyes playfully. "I no longer trust the cuisine in this place I'll have you know."

"Noted." When she shook her head, having nothing else to say about this, he asked about her. "How has your week gone?"

"Fine." She told him. "At least until this morning." He raised an eyebrow. "Not that anything's wrong, but I was looking for a book and it was nowhere to be found. When I tried to figure out what was going on I found more of them gone."

"How do you know they were ever there?"

"They're in the card catalog and the computer. It said they were all in something called B level storage." He listened, but showed no sign of recognition or deceit. "Do you know what that is?"

"No." He said with a shrug. "But I would guess it means basement storage."

"The library has a basement?" She asked. "I never found a basement."

He shrugged. "It's only a guess, dearie. I didn't make this town, Regina did. I've found a few of her secret spots, but I'm sure I've missed just as many." His eyes glittered darkly and she knew they were both thinking of the asylum. "I have no idea what B might stand for other than basement."

"I'll look again." She told him.

He nodded in agreement of her plan and they began to talk about some of the books she had read in the last few weeks. She enjoyed the conversation, liking that he had different views on some things than she did. It was interesting, hearing things from his perspective. She had always enjoyed his mind. At the castle he had kept her entertained with stories and riddles, challenging her in a way no one else ever had before. She liked that, liked that he saw in her a quick witted companion when so many had dismissed her for being a woman, for being a noble lady, for being a pretty face. He, unlike anyone else she had ever met, wanted for her to be as clever as she was. For months he had prodded and poked at her intellect the way he did at a spell or new magical acquisition, looking for soft spots, looking for hidden corners and secrets, pleased when he found she was able to keep up with his intellectual demands as easily as the house work. His mind had always been sharp, always ready with a plan or plot regardless of the situation, but there were differences now she couldn't deny even if his approach to her appeared to be the same, still trying to work her out.

When he was an imp he had either been so full of energy that he was incapable of being still, or he would sit like a statue, not even blinking. She was never sure what to expect when she walked in a room with him, other than his sharp tongue. The first few times she'd seen him spinning straw to gold had been disconcerting, not because of the magic, because if she were honest with herself that was wondrous, but because of his blank, emotionless expression. He had made no indication that she even existed when he was like that, and she often wondered what he must be thinking of. It was always hard for her to tell with his flat, slate colored eyes. She had to rely nearly completely on his facial expressions, as minute as they were, to tell how he was really feeling. Even his body language couldn't always be trusted. Often his face would tell her one thing while his body told her another story completely. It was a wonder she ever knew what he was really thinking at all.

Now though… Now it was his eyes that told her so many things. And it seemed they always matched his body language. He no longer acted with such insane impulsivity or erratic flourishes. In this world he was still, dignified, and thoughtful. His mind was the same, of that she had no doubt, but it was tempered by his physical limitations and years of forced patience. This new aspect of him, this calm that he kept over his spurts of aggression and frustration, was comforting to her half undone senses. She was sure the first few days she had been out in the world that the imp he had been may well have thrown her completely over the line of sanity she was balancing so precariously on. Rumpelstiltskin the man managed it with gentle touches, soothing words, and surprising fortitude. She hadn't thought he could be this way. She had hoped, hoped he could be a man for her, hoped that if the curse was gone they could have a happy life, but truly and deep down, she wasn't sure she ever really expected it, not for more than a few brief moments.

While they talked Ruby brought out the food. Playful anticipation ran down her spine as the waitress slid the plates onto the table with practiced ease. The food smelled wonderful and she recognized the fried potatoes that were on the plate with the burgers. Before she could even ask Ruby set down a side of Ranch dressing for her. "There you go. Call me if you need anything else."

"Thank you." She said brightly as she grabbed one of the French fries and dipped it in the white sauce. Rumple shook his head when she ate it with visible pleasure.

"That's disgusting."

She smirked at him, swallowing her food before replying. "It's good." She held the small dish of Ranch toward him innocently, seeing how appalling he found this combination to be. "Do you want some?"

"Absolutely not." He said as he reached over for the ketchup.

"Rumple?"

"Belle." He replied as he flicked the top of his preferred sauce open.

"You never liked tomatoes."

"You noticed." He said dryly and she knew they were both recalling the first time she had dared to present him with the despised vegetable. He had accused her of trying to poison him and ruin his salad, which somehow, in his convoluted snipping rant, would result in the total destruction of him, his castle, all the magic in the world, and the death of every unicorn to have ever been born in the past, present, and future. When he was done with that and all she had done was reach over and pluck the cubed red fruits from his dish without so much as an acknowledgement that it was somehow her fault she couldn't read his mind, or that he had overreacted with amazing dramatics he had narrowed his eyes and insisted he could not eat a salad she had touched with her hands. She had replied there was no possible way for her to have made the salad without her hands to begin with, having regained a considerable amount of spunk after he hadn't killed, tortured, or otherwise tormented her for chipping his cup two days prior. That stumped him for half a moment before he blasted the entire bowl away with a puff of purple magic and instead ate the main course, ignoring her utterly for two days as some sort of punishment for her logic.

"Oh, aye." She said, mimicking his accent as she plucked the bottle from his hands and turned it so she could read the label. He narrowed his eyes and she could tell he was enjoying her playing with him. She raised an eyebrow and looked pointedly at the writing. "Ingredients. _T__omato_ concentrate made from red ripe _tomatoes_, distilled vinegar, high fructose corn syrup, salt, spice, onion powder, and natural flavoring." She held it so he could see it as she pointed to the word tomato empathetically.

"Are you done, dearie?" He asked.

"Simply confused." She said innocently as she gave him the bottle back.

He flicked the top open with his thump and dumped a large blob of it on the side of his plate. "It doesn't taste like tomatoes."

She tried not to laugh as his stoic defense of himself. "I see." He stoutly refused to rise to her bait and she kept picking at him because she found this utterly silly. "So they won't actually kill you then."

"I think we both know they won't."

She laughed, her eyes dancing. "So the unicorns are safe?"

"Were there any here I'm sure they would be."

There weren't unicorns here? That was disappointing. She had always wanted to see one. She brushed that aside and looked at her meal. She had wanted to try this for some time and would not let her mood be ruined by a lack of unicorns. "Small mercies." She said before she picked up the large sandwich wondering if it were possible to actually bite through the whole thing. After a moment she squished the thing together to make it smaller and took a small bite.

While it wasn't as good as the chocolate she did enjoy it. It was extremely flavorful and the variety of toppings on it somehow balanced one another nicely. Rumpelstiltskin watched her and when she swallowed he spoke. "Do you like it?"

"It's very good." She told him. "It's like someone took a whole meal and stuck it between two slices of bread."

He smiled at her for that and began his own meal. The next hour was pleasant and more relaxed than she had hoped for. Rumple kept the conversation light and interesting at once and didn't hurry her through the meal or try to fill the few silences that fell between them. When Ruby finally came back to take their plates and offer desert she had declined, being far too full to eat anything else. Rumpelstiltskin hadn't pushed the issue and slid some money under the ketchup bottle without ever looking at the bill. Even so, having been coming here for weeks now, she knew he left far more than he needed even with a generous tip to her friend. Considering he hadn't meant for her to see the amount he left she wondered what prompted such excess.

They left as several of the dwarves came in, covered in dust and looking weary but determined. The grumpy one and the older one both glared at Rumpelstiltskin, who ignored them as if they didn't exist, which she suspected rankled the younger one more than if he had turned him into a toad. Refusing to instigate anything she said nothing, pretended ignorance of the interaction, and allowed Rumple to hold the door open for her as they left.

As they walked back toward his shop, her stomach pleasantly full, he broke the easy silence that had settled between them as they put space between themselves and the dwarves. "What have you been thinking about so hard?"

She wasn't surprised he noticed. "You." She answered honestly.

"I'm not sure how to take that, dearest."

She looked over at him. "It's just… You're different than you were." He looked over at her and she clarified. "You're so much calmer than before. I thought for a while it was the magic that made you like that, but you have magic again so that can't be it."

"I'm human now, or far closer to it than I have been in a very long time. Does it bother you?"

"No." She told him. "I like you this way. I mean, I liked you all mischievous and playful too, but this is… I don't know, you seem more real. It's still you, and your mind is the same as it was…" She was struggling to articulate what she was feeling.

"But I'm a man." He finished for her.

"Yes." She answered. "You're a man."

"As I recall that was what you wanted."

She stopped and he did as well. She sensed now what had bothered him so much, what may have helped set him off all those years ago. "It was never you I was trying to change, Rumpelstiltskin, it was your circumstances. I never cared what you looked like. I never cared what people said or that you had a past. I cared that you were good to me and that you cared about me too. But I was afraid for you. I was afraid of the darkness that had wrapped around your heart. I wanted you to find peace. I won't pretend I wanted it all for you either. It was selfish of me not to think that maybe you had reasons you wanted to stay as you were, but I was young and you never said. I thought you wanted the curse gone. I thought if I broke it we could be happy in a way I never thought I would get to have before we met." His dark eyes took on that same expression they always did when he was mystified by her, when she surprised him. "But I swear I was never trying to hurt you. I never betrayed you and I was never part of some sort of plot to hurt you. I did think we could be happy together."

"And now?" He asked quietly.

"I think I was naïve to believe that it would be so easy." She told him. "It does matter to me that you have a past, and it should, because that made you who you are and it does matter. And it matters what people think of you because that impacts me too." He jerked his head in acknowledgement. "And I'm still afraid for you, because the darkness is still there waiting to lash out or escape completely. I have nightmares that one day you'll be what you were before, that you'll turn back into the almost man that took me away from home." He flinched ever so slightly.

"I understand."

"No, you've stopped paying attention." She said, knowing when he was retreating into himself. "Please listen for just a little bit longer. When I'm done you'll have time to think about it." His eyes refocused on her. "Knowing those things doesn't change that I love you. Those things help me understand you, and I think when everything is said and done I need to do that. If I don't know you I can't love you, not the way you deserve to be loved, not in a real way that matters. I know how hard you're trying to let me in. I know that's difficult for you, and I know it's hard for you to give me space. I also know that in the time we've been apart I've changed into something you don't understand anymore either. Most days I'm not sure I understand and I'm the one in my own head. You need to understand me too, and I'm not sure I'm going to make it easy either." She let him absorb that for a few seconds. "But I do think we can be happy. Maybe it's not the same, perfect, endlessly wonderful happy that I used to believe in, but it's a real happiness."

"Reality is rarely what we expect." He conceded, but she saw a sudden and amazing amount of hope in him, despite his steady voice. "I wouldn't trade anything for the real happiness we can have."

Smiled at him softly she nodded. "Then let's make this our new beginning. Let's work on making ourselves a real happiness instead of one we kept trying to build on desperate hope and loneliness. I don't want all you have of me to be a chipped cup. I want to be here." She touched a finger to his chest. "And here." She brushed his temple. "And maybe someday back in your house, once we've decided what our real happiness should be like. Can we do that?"

Catching her hand with his he held her fingers and kissed her knuckles gently. When he spoke his voice was shaking ever so slightly. "I would like that more than I can say."

Some sort of tension she hadn't known was there loosened inside her. "I'm glad."

He squeezed her hand and let her go. "I think you were right, wanting your own place." She was taken utterly aback considering how much that had upset him. "I'm not saying I like it, but you're right, we don't know each other the way we should. You know a man that was lost fully in a curse and took you away from everyone you knew. I know a woman that was trying her best to be brave and not let me see anything else because I didn't give you any other choice. There are things we both need to learn, even if I have more to do than you." He paused for a beat, gathering himself. "I can be patient waiting for you, Belle, but if I learn how to leave this town I am going to go."

Of course he was. Truly, she understood as much as anyone without a child possibly could. "For Bae."

"For Bae." He agreed. "I'll tell you before I leave though, and I want you to know when I leave I want you to come with me." She opened her mouth but he made a gesture to stop her. "You don't need to decide now. I only want you to know." He steadied himself. "And if you want to stay I'll come back for you."

"Okay." She said softly, understanding.

"Okay." He agreed, and they started toward his shop again.

"I had a nice time, Rumple."

He smiled at her. "So did I." Pleased that she hadn't been the only one her mood stayed up. "When would you like to start cooking lessons?"

Well, it seemed as if he were trying to brave for her by being the one to bring up their next possible meeting. She very much appreciated the effort, especially knowing how terrified he was of her bolting on him, rejecting him, or avoiding him forever. "I need machine lessons, not cooking lessons." She grumbled. "I know how to cook."

His lip curled. "My deepest apologies."

She shoved at him gently. "Rotten." She accused playfully. "How about Wednesday?"

"If you'd like." He agreed as they got to the front of his shop. "What would you like to try to make?"

"I don't know. Something familiar would be nice."

He thought that over. "I think I can manage that. I'll come over at seven?"

"I'll see you then." He smiled, and once again lifted his hand to brush over her cheek. "Thank you for lunch."

"Thank you for the company. Be safe, love."

Her eyes twinkled as she stepped away from him. "The only thing likely to get me are dust bunnies, but I'll do my best. Goodbye, Rumpelstiltskin. Have a good weekend."

"Belle." He said in way of farewell, and once again he watched her as she walked across the street and around the corner. As he lost sight of her she wondered if maybe this time they could work. She so terribly wanted them to work. Perhaps small steps forward were what they needed to do that because when it was everything at once it was always too much. She wasn't sure people were made to feel as much as he made her feel, but she wouldn't trade it for anything no matter how hard it was. Some things were just worth hurting over.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Ruby found her later that night as she was searching through the library desk for a flashlight. Since she couldn't sleep she figured she might as well be productive in some sense and see if there really was a basement in here somewhere. If there was it was only a matter of time before she located it. She refused to live in a place that was hiding secrets from her. She had more than enough secrets in her life, she refused to allow such nonsense from a building of all things. She heard a knock on the front doors of her workplace and looked up, spotting Ruby trying to see her through the window. Abandoning her search she went to the door and opened it quickly, smiling at her friend. "You're up late for someone that gets up early enough to serve the town breakfast." She told her friend.

Ruby stepped inside and looked around, not even acknowledging what she said. "Are you all right? Are you alone?"

She frowned in confusion. "Yes."

Her friend shut the door behind her as she sniffed the air to be sure that was true. "Did he make you eat with him?"

Taken aback she defended both herself and Rumpelstiltskin at the same time. "Of course not."

Ruby didn't seem convinced. "Belle, I'm serious. I almost threw hot coffee on him so you could run."

"I'm glad you didn't. That really would have ruined the ambience of our meal."

Her friend wasn't amused with her effort at humor. "This isn't funny! That man is dangerous!"

She sighed. Eventually she was bound to either get used to everyone saying the exact same thing to her as if she were stupid, or someone would surprise her and tell her something original. "Not to me." She told her honestly. "And what part of our meal made you think I didn't want to be there?"

"Who in their right mind would?" She threw back.

She fought off the insult to Rumple as well as the implication that she was crazy. She wasn't crazy, not anymore, and she refused to be ever again. "I know he's not the easiest man to deal with-"

"Are you serious?" Ruby asked, nearly shouting. "Even if you completely ignore all the horrible things he did before we got here, which let's face it, you can't, he has been nothing but ruthless here!"

"Not everything he did was bad, Ruby." She said honestly. "He stopped the ogre wars, all three of them. He saved thousands and thousands of people doing that."

Her friend sighed. "From what I heard he only stopped the last one because some poor idiot girl traded herself for it. The gods only know what he did to her. That's what he does, Belle. He makes deals. He makes deals that ruin lives."

"He never makes people take his deals." She said, knowing it was a weak defense at best. "There's always the option to say no."

"And that makes it okay?"

"No." She said softly. "It doesn't make it okay."

Ruby dropped her aggressive attitude when she realized she wasn't in some sort of denial by pretending he was perfect. She turned back into the sweet friend she had grown so fond of. "You have to understand why I'm worried. I don't want you hurt."

Of one thing she was very sure. "Rumpelstiltskin would never hurt me."

"Really?" She asked, putting a hand on her hip, looking not at all convinced. "You said he kept you. All this time he kept you what? Locked in his house? Is that why I never saw you before everything changed back again?"

Her mind whirled and she realized how Ruby must have taken her comment on being a kept woman. "Ruby…" She didn't want to talk about this, didn't want to think about it. "I wasn't with Rumpelstiltskin. He thought I was dead until an hour before the curse broke." She went back to her desk to search for the flashlight she was sure she had seen at some point. "He never could bring himself to keep me away from other people no matter how much he would prefer that."

There was a long silence following that. As she began to rummage around in the bottom drawer she heard her friend's high-heeled shoes clicking as she walked toward her over the checkered tile floor. "What do you mean he thought you were dead?"

"I mean he thought I was dead." She said, unsure of how to make it any clearer. "He thought I was dead for a long time." No flashlight, she moved onto the file cabinet behind her. "A very long time."

"Why would he think that?"

"Because he couldn't find me, no one could. Everyone thought I was dead."

"Where were you?"

Her hand curled around cool metal and she pulled. The large silver flashlight she remembered seeing was there and her triumph was squashed under the memories. "It doesn't matter anymore." She made sure the light worked and when it did she shut the cabinet. Gathering herself she faced her friend. "When I escaped and found him he protected me. I was with him at his house for a week, but he wasn't keeping me there. I could have left whenever I wanted." She rolled the flashlight between her hands. "He kept me safe, Ruby. Truly he did. He helped me get better. I know it must have looked differently with how we met. We had an argument, but he wasn't keeping me prisoner."

"Better?" The other woman was watching her with worry as she repeated the important part back at her. It was easy to see from the way she was acting that something very wrong had happened.

"I was… sick." She looked away again as she flashed back to her first few days with him. She hadn't been in the best shape when she finally got free. Years of solitude and inactivity, no matter if it was buffered by stabilizing magic, had taken its toll on her physically. When she had come back to him after their fight over his lying she had been beyond tired, the only thing keeping her up was a fear that she had actually been dreaming and she was likely to wake up back in her cell if she gave into her exhaustion. She had moved more in a few hours than she had in over thirty years combined, because Regina had her at her castle before the curse for at least two, although she admitted time had started to get away from her at some point so she wasn't sure exactly how long she'd been in that dungeon.

By the time they got back to his home she was stumbling and near collapse, and he had half carried her upstairs after he made her kick off the heels he had given her to wear. She could tell he was on high alert. Between the magic he had released, which was bound to cause a stir, and having her here with him he was in the closest thing to a tizzy she'd ever seen. He had taken her into a large bedroom and put her on the bed where she sat swaying as he went to a dresser and dug out a set of dark colored men's sleepwear. He had given it to her and promised a swift return with something to drink, giving her privacy while she changed.

When he came back ten minutes later she was laying quietly over the blankets completely limp and unable to keep herself up anymore after she changed and set her dress at the end of the bed. She doubted she could have eaten the snacks he brought up with him even if she wanted to. He had hovered over her with worry, cooing reassurances as he stroked her hair back. "Everything is all right now." He told her as she watched him. "Nothing will hurt you again."

She had smiled at him as best she could, wondering if he was reassuring her or himself about that. Even at his most powerful he hadn't been able to protect her. "I'm only tired, Rumpelstiltskin."

"It's safe to rest here." He promised, his fingers ghosting over her face and silk covered arm, reassuring himself she was here and real. She wondered if he thought she was a hallucination. He couldn't seem to stop touching her. It was as if he were afraid she would blow away like smoke over an open campfire.

"Is this your home here?" She asked, still afraid to allow sleep to claim her.

He nodded as he watched her, perched precariously on the side of the bed. "This is my house, yes."

"Am I very tired, or is it pink on the outside?"

His lip curled up at the question, his eyes sparking with affection and amusement. "You are very tired and the house is pink."

"Why is your house pink?"

His smile fell. "Regina thought it a great joke I'm sure."

She was quiet for a moment. "I heard whispers…" That was all she heard for a long time, whispers of guards walking by her cell. Regina had allowed no one to speak to her, keeping her utterly isolated save for the mute man that gave her food once a day. "They said she was making a curse that would destroy us all. Is that what happened? Why are we all alive?"

"The curse was made to stop people from getting their happily ever after. She wanted to curse Snow White for what she'd done to her. Death was too fast a fate for Regina. She wanted everyone to suffer. The curse brought us all to this world and gave all but a few false memories and lives. The curse kept people that loved one another apart; it made them unhappy and miserable. We've been trapped in a sort of stasis for the last twenty-eight years."

"It made people unhappy?" She asked dully, thinking she had been rather beyond unhappy.

His expression twisted, although he tried to stop it. He ran his hand over her head, trying to comfort her. "For some it was worse than others."

Worse for her because of what he felt. Worse for her because it was the queen's punishment for him. The fact that she suffered meant little to the other woman, save for the pain she knew it would bring him, for the guilt and loss of focus that would come with the knowledge that he could have saved her from so much. Saying nothing more about it, and feeling as if she might cry she finally spoke. "Is this really happening right now or is this another trick of hers?"

His voice broke. "This is happening, Belle."

She believed him. "Well-" Her voice sounded odd, odder than it did just hearing it when she hadn't spoken in so long. "-that does make me feel better."

Leaning down he kissed her temple, hovering over her. "You need to sleep, dearest." She hated that she had to agree. "I'll be in the room across the hall if you need me."

She frowned. "Isn't this your room?" It seemed it was. It looked lived in, he had his clothes here, and to be frank she could smell him all over the blankets and pillows she was laying on. She could see it in the way the objects in this room were placed just so and turned ever so slightly to face directions he would prefer as he stood or sat in here.

"It's yours now." He said as he sat back up.

Grabbing his sleeve she held onto him as best she could. "Don't leave me alone." She said, looking at him. "I don't want to be alone right now."

"If you're sure." He said softly.

"Yes." He nodded jerkily and stood up. He went to the wall and turned the light off with the switch. Walking to the other side of the bed he shook out of his jacket and tie before sitting down and kicking off his shoes. He lay down behind her over the blankets too and slipped his arm carefully over her middle. Gathering the last of her energy she scooted closer to him until her back was pressed against his chest, and then went still. She felt his heart beating hard in his chest as her eyes slid closed. "Be here when I wake up." She breathed, knowing if he was this wasn't another hallucination or vivid drug induced dream.

He set his chin over the crown of her head. "I will be." He had been good to his word that time. She must have slept a long time because when she woke up the sun was shining strongly through the large bay windows. Squinting, she held her hand up to shield her eyes, unused to the brightness and more than half blind from it. When she jerked to get away from it, if only long enough to see straight, she jolted into him. "Belle?"

"Rumpelstiltskin?" She really couldn't see at all, but hearing his voice and feeling his arm over her made her feel saner than she had ever been before.

"What's the matter?" He asked, shoving himself up on his elbow.

"It's too bright." She said. "It's all right." He got up and she heard his cane tapping on the wood floors. She wondered why he had a cane again as the sunlight dimmed dramatically. She heard soft metal clicks and rustling fabric as he continued to pull the curtains over the windows. When he was done she opened her eyes slowly, blinking the spots away. "Thank you."

"How are your eyes?"

"Fine." She told him, and it was true. She could see him now. He was in the same clothes he had been in when she fell asleep and she tried to remember a time she had ever seen him in something wrinkled and looking like it had been worn for more than a few hours. She didn't think she ever had. He also needed to shave, which for some reason threw her utterly. She sat up, her body aching in places she forgotten she had from all the activity she had put it through. Despite that she was pleased, pleased and grateful that she had done all those things. Yesterday she had walked through the woods again, something she had never thought she would get to do again. "How long did I sleep?"

"As long as you needed to." He told her in his normal evasive manner.

Her lip twitched up. "Helpful."

He smiled back. "Are you hungry?"

Constantly. "I am."

"I'll go start breakfast and let you clean up." He told her. "I'm afraid I don't have anything else for you to wear, but I'll get you some things when I go out."

"Go out?" She asked as she stood up carefully.

"To my shop." He told her. "There are things I need to get."

"What-"

"I'll tell you while you eat." He said reasonably. "You said you were hungry."

She supposed she couldn't fault that logic. She gave in to him. "All right."

He indicated the door they had come through the night before. "I'll show you the washroom."

He'd taken her to a bathroom, which was larger than her cell had been, and left her to her own devices. He pulled the door closed as he went and she flinched badly at the sound. Rolling her shoulders she forced herself to calm down, knowing he would never lock her in here. She had rummaged about for several minutes looking for soap and a cloth to clean her face, as well as a hairbrush. She took as much time as she could stand with the door shut the way it was and when she came out she had her hair in some sort of order and looked clean.

She was still in the long pants and shirt he'd given her to sleep in, but it was comfortable at least. She thought it an odd sort of thing to sleep in. It was like wearing one of his old shirts from the castle, except not so puffy. It was a deep emerald green and buttoned up, the collar was folded neatly, but came down lower than what she had seen him wearing here. Shaking her head a little she caught the cuff between her fingers and rubbed it, enjoying the texture more than she could say. Trying to get her mind back on something normal she stood in the hall and looked around for him. "Rumple?"

He must not have heard her, but a second later she heard sounds downstairs. Going toward them she looked around more closely than she had last night when they came in and saw any number of things she recognized as her eyes adjusted to the much brighter light the windows through the house were letting in. By the time she found him in a very pretty, if odd looking kitchen she was convinced he had brought most of his castle with him. He looked up from what he was doing to see her staring up at an oar he had mounted halfway up a high wall. "How do eggs sound?"

"Perfect." She said with a smile, noticing he had somehow managed to clean up and change into a different crisp suit in less time than it had taken her to brush her hair. She immediately felt frumpy, but he was watching her with such warm delight that she pushed it aside. Moving toward him she spotted a flowerpot sitting near a large glass door. "Did you bring the Dark Castle with you or fit everything in it here somehow?"

He smiled at the question and flipped a few eggs that he must have started a minute ago. "Not all of it."

"Just most of it?" She teased.

"The important bits at least." He told her as he left the eggs and began to get out plates and cutlery. "I won't be gone long, Belle. I just need to get you clothes and pick up a few odds and ends. All my maps are at the shop."

"Maps? Why do you need maps?"

His eyes twinkled. "Didn't I say? I'm taking you on a trip to see the world."

She laughed softly. "Really, why do you need the maps?"

"I'm perfectly serious." He assured her. "We're leaving this evening if you're up for it."

She stood there speechless for a second. "Yes, but…"

He frowned when he saw her hesitance. "What's the matter, dearest? I can't see why you'd want to stay here. You told me you wanted to travel."

"That's not-" She was stumbling over herself. "Of course I do, but the curse put us all here didn't it?"

"Yes."

"Then my father has to be here too." She looked at him pleadingly. "I haven't seen him since we made our bargain. He must think I'm dead too."

His expression closed down and he sighed as he went to get napkins. "Belle, I haven't seen your father here."

Her heart sank and she stood there in silent agony. When he turned back around he must have seen the devastation on her face. She tried to gather herself. "I can go look. Maybe someone else has."

"Perhaps." He agreed. "We can leave a number with someone here, so they can contact us if they find him."

"A number?" She asked in confusion.

"A phone number." When she stared at him blankly he frowned. "When the curse broke it shouldn't have erased your false memories."

"What?"

"Why don't you know what a phone number is?" He asked more directly.

"Should I know?" She asked.

He was watching her intently now. "Yes, you should. Do you know what a television is?" She shook her head. "A car?"

"The carriage we were in yesterday?" She remembered him saying his car would take them home when he saw how tired she was.

She could tell her answers weren't making him all that happy. "Electricity?"

She felt better at once. "I know that one." Why she was so eager to please she wasn't sure. Possibly because she was suddenly feeling like an idiot and that had never happened to her before, not where basic knowledge was concerned at any rate. "It makes the lights come on. Is that right?"

"Yes, that's right." He said with an odd inflection. To his left there was a loud pop and she jumped. He frowned and pointed to a small metal box. "It's the toaster. It won't hurt you."

"Oh." She said, knowing she was acting badly. She edged closer as he plucked toast out of it and began to butter it. Within a minute he had the toast and eggs on a plate and was ushering her to a table. He pulled her chair out for her and she sat. He left her to go get them drinks and as he poured some juice into glasses picked the previous topic back up.

"I'll leave my number with the sheriff. She'll call us if anyone finds your father."

"I don't understand how that works."

"Like a messenger bird, but a machine." He answered as he brought her juice and set it in front of her. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small white box with a glass face.

"You don't like mirrors." She said as she took it curiously.

"It's not a mirror." He assured her. "It's a phone."

She turned it over in her hands and when her finger brushed the glass it lit up. She dropped it at once, alarmed and he flinched as it clattered over the tabletop. "I'm sorry." She said at once, sure she had broken something else.

"No matter." He said, picking it up and putting it back in his pocket. "No harm done. Does that set you at ease?"

"Why are you in such a hurry to leave?" She asked as she picked up her fork and put her napkin in her lap, pulling out long unused manners.

"I'm not well liked here." He told her with a shrug. "I never was. Sometimes its best to step out of the line of fire especially when people remember me now."

That made sense. Wishing he was different was a pointless exercise. "But the sheriff would still help you?"

"She owes me a favor." He said with a twist of his lips.

She wondered if anything had changed since she had been captured despite their move from one world to another. She saved this line of thought for later. "If you're sure she'll contact you." She smiled a little. "I would like to travel."

His shoulders relaxed at her agreement. "I am."

Nodding, and some hope returned to her that her father might be here somewhere she began to eat. She finished two eggs and four pieces of toast before he was even half done. When she looked back up he was eyeing her again in that way that told her something was wrong and he was anything but happy about it. She smiled again. "That was wonderful."

"Are you still hungry?" She shook her head and he set his fork down. He could tell she was lying. "Belle?"

"I really feel much better." She assured him. Saying nothing he stood up and went to a large metal box that was taller than he was. Opening it he rummaged around and she leaned back to see what he was doing. She saw the box was filled with food of all kinds and he grabbed a strange clear container and lifted a lid off of it. Shutting the box he pulled a bowl down and dumped the colorful contents into it. Bringing it back to the table he set it in front of her and she saw it was filled with fresh cut fruit of all kinds. Leaning down he caught her face and kissed her temple.

"There's plenty more." He said, his voice ever so slightly strained. "Eat as much as you want."

"Thank you." She whispered.

He kissed her again before going back to his seat. He finished his breakfast as she ate the fruit, some of it being kinds she'd never had before. She was thoroughly engrossed with it and glanced up when she heard his chair scrap across the floor. He was wiping his mouth as he stood, his food half uneaten, and when he set the napkin down he spoke. "I'll be back in an hour or so. You're welcome to explore if you'd like." He said, waving at the house vaguely. "I wouldn't go out in what you're wearing though. You'll look a bit out of place in that."

"I'll keep that in mind." She said with her lips quirked. He caressed her cheek tenderly as he passed her.

"You're safe here, love. I'll be back soon." She had wished him good luck, and when he left occupied herself well enough for an hour exploring all the rooms he had. An hour after that and she started to feel decidedly odd. Things didn't get better as time ticked by and he still didn't come back. By the time the third hour passed she realized what was happening as she got violently ill in the washroom he had taken her to when she got up.

When he finally did return, hours after he told her he would, she was so ill she couldn't stand up, let alone leave the bathroom. She heard him come in, the door closing with a snap, right before she began to gag over the porcelain bowl again. All the food he'd managed to get in her this morning, and it was clear he had been more than a little alarmed over how thin she was, was long gone. She had been puking for well over two hours, unable get her stomach to settle or her head to stop spinning or pounding painfully. She hadn't felt this sick in a long time, not since the last time she had tried to resist a nurse and they stopped giving her those shots. She hadn't even remembered the incident until she started getting sick and then the memories rushed at her in a sickening wave of confusion, fear, and disgust.

The last few times this had happened the workers in the asylum had let her stay sick for half a day or so before they came in, told her this would be what happened if she fought them, and gave her another shot. It had put her in that same horrible fog she hated so much, but she had stopped getting sick. She had learned not to rebel after three or four of these forced episodes of illness. As she gagged, her stomach trying to push things out that weren't there, she heard him call to her. "Belle?" Unable to respond she let out a gasp as she managed to catch her breath and shook horribly as she fell sideways against the wall. "Belle?" He called more insistently.

She tried to answer, really she did, but she couldn't find the energy. Her head lolled, her chin falling to her chest as her body jerked with intermittent ticks. The third time he called her she heard fear creeping into his voice. "Belle?" His cane clicked on the stairs as he hurried up them and a minute later he was in the bedroom across the hall. When he didn't see her in there she felt his panic starting to take hold. "Belle?" Then he was standing in the doorway of the bathroom and saw her. Letting out a strangled sound of fear he rushed to her, ignoring his weak leg utterly as he knelt down beside her with an awkward thump, his nimble fingers running over her. "Belle, love, what's the matter?"

"Sick." She rasped.

"Yes, I can see that." He said with worry. He ran his hand over her forehead and when it came away coated in sweat he let out a low curse. "Love, look at me." Raising her head with great effort she looked at him. "Belle, what's going on?"

She jerked again, her limbs only half in her control. "Shh. It's okay." She put her hand on his chest, trying to sooth him. "It always happens."

"What?" He demanded. "What do you mean it always happens?"

"They made it happen before. I don't think it can last forever." Because if it could she was sure they would have let it go on and on. Regina had enjoyed seeing her in pain.

"What are you talking about?" He demanded.

Before she could answer her stomach rolled again and she lunged forward jerkily so she could gag over the toilet. He grabbed at her hair to get it out of the way and held her up with his free hand. Her stomach ached as it somehow managed to push up some sort of green bile, which she suspected was nothing more than stomach acid, and he was stiff beside her. When she finally stopped she answered his question as she slumped. He caught her before she could either slide to the floor or hit her head on the edge of the toilet. "It happens when they stop giving me the shots."

There was a half a second of silence. "You're in withdrawal?" He nearly shouted, although she knew he wasn't yelling at her.

"What?" She asked as a chill hit her, her entire body being run over by shivers. She wasn't clear on what that meant and didn't honestly have the focus to try to work it out.

Shifting fluidly he put his back against the wall and tugged her so she was cradled against his chest. She thought this was really not the best thing when she was likely to start loosing her stomach again, but he held her firmly to him. Holding her tightly he twisted his wrist and a bottle with shinning blue liquid magic appeared. He flicked the glass stopper off it carelessly, sending it rolling under his clawed bathtub with a clink. "Drink this."

She tried to push it away weakly, knowing she would only throw it up again, and not liking that it was magic. "No." She protested as firmly as she could.

"Belle, it's this or I'm taking you to the hospital." Her blood ran cold at the very thought, even if she knew very well he didn't mean the asylum. "I have no idea what kind of drugs they had you on. You could well have a stroke and die if they took you off something strong all at once. The potion will heal whatever it is that's ailing you." She let out another low whimper and he leaned down and kissed the top of her head. "Please trust me. I know how you feel about me doing magic, but I can't leave you like this."

Giving in, she tried to take it, but when he saw her hand shaking he put the bottle to her lips and titled it up. She drank it, feeling as if she were swallowing liquid light, and almost at once the dizziness and stomach pain stopped. Her body, exhausted from the physical toll of whatever just happened, simply gave out. He dropped the vile and grabbed her with his other arm too, holding her up against him securely. He kissed her head and began to sooth her and himself as he ran one of his hands over her hair over and over again. "It's all right, you're all right." He kissed the top of her head again. "That won't ever happen again." He nuzzled his face into her mangled curls. "Is it better?"

"Much better." She assured him softly. "Thank you." In response he kissed her again, still highly agitated. "Am I supposed to be tired?"

"That's normal." He promised. "You're soaked through with sweat, dearie."

She was trying to think. "You said there's always a price." He went still. "What was the price for that?"

"A butterfly."

"What?"

"And one of my rose bushes." He sighed and when he spoke she heard all his many years in his voice, as if she had just asked him a horribly hurtful question. "Not all prices are as high as others. Potions that heal have some of the lowest costs. I suppose it's only fair to throw in the energy I expended making it as well, a drop of sweat, the expenditure of focus. A small price to stop that."

It had never occurred to her that the price wasn't always life threatening, excepting of course to the butterfly. "Oh."

He kissed her head again. "Let's get you cleaned up and in bed. Can you sit up?" Gathering herself she pushed off him carefully. He held her shoulders until he was sure she was steady and then pushed himself up off the floor and turned on the faucets in the tub. She watched him as he moved, and he stroked her head as he passed. "Just sit there for a moment and catch your balance. The potion will keep working until you're back to normal so you should keep feeling better for the next few minutes." She nodded and he left briefly. He came back with a new dress and undergarments for her and set them on the sink. Kneeling back down awkwardly he cupped her face. "Do you think you can take a bath by yourself?"

She tried not to blush, but was sure she failed. "Yes."

"Good." Standing back up he helped her to her feet and she swayed for a few seconds, holding onto his shoulders before catching her balance. She really was feeling better as the seconds ticked by. It was amazing. Letting him go she stood on her own and smiled tiredly at him.

"I'm okay now." And really she did feel much better. "Give me a few minutes and I'll be ready to go. Did you get your maps?"

He flinched terribly and she knew something was wrong. Reaching to him on instinct she touched his cheek. "Rumple?"

He caught her hand and gathered himself, tucking things away beneath his new human veneer. "I'm afraid we can't go."

"Why not?"

"It seems the curse had more to it than I thought, Bel-."

"Belle!" She jumped at her friend's sharp call, crashing out of her memories harshly. Ruby was watching her with worry. "Are you all right?"

She squared her shoulders. "Yes." Lifting the flashlight she turned it on. "I know you don't trust him, Ruby, and I understand. I really, really do, but underneath everything he's a good man."

The other woman let out a sigh. "You were talking about him the other day weren't you?" She asked. "When you said you were an expert at rehabilitation."

"I was." She said, trying to not think about being chained to the pipes. She was starting to wonder what about her made people lock her up places all the time.

"Look, if you're sure he won't hurt you then I won't bring it up again, but I have to ask. Are you sure?"

"I'm sure." She said firmly.

"All right then." Ruby looked at what she was holding. "What's the flashlight for?"

Flicking it off again she gave her friend a determined look. "I have books missing. Want to help me find them?" Ruby gave her an odd look, glanced around, and shrugged. Taking that as a yes they began to hunt.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

The week rolled by rather slowly for her. She hadn't found a basement, despite her persistence and Ruby's evening of help. She had moved things all over the place in the library to search including shelves, books, rugs, and the card catalog, but she hadn't found anything more than a few bits of dirt that had escaped her first cleaning. She had searched diligently for any sign of a door leading down, having been in enough secret places to know that it might be hiding very impressively, but there was nothing, not even a crack in the floor that would lead her to believe that there was a secret hatch hiding there.

It had wasted most of her day off looking, and she had been so focused on finding it that Ruby had eventually walked over with food late in the afternoon when she never showed up at the inn to eat. It had been very nice of her really, although when she glanced around and saw the library in shambles it was clear her friend was more than slightly worried about this odd mania that had gripped her. Together they had put all heavy shelves back in place and the remainder of her afternoon, and most of the night, had been spent returning the books to their proper resting places.

Frustrated, she went back to work wondering where all the missing books were. Tuesday when she was having breakfast Granny suggested she go to city hall and get a copy of the blueprints of the library when she overheard her grumbling about it to her granddaughter. Having not a clue about how to go about that had resulted in a conversation that lasted through breakfast and all her lunch break. Once it was done and she was armed with this information she had headed to city hall.

Having not been there before she glanced around with interest at the building. It was by no means large, but it was prettily built and the architecture of this world was different enough to still hold her interest. Exploring the entrance kept her occupied for a few minutes before she satisfied herself and asked for directions to the document room from a passing woman. She walked into a very full office that held innumerable shelves, drawers, papers, books, and an older balding man. If the name on his desk was to be believed he was Mr. Krzyszkowski. Unsure of how to pronounce that name, and thinking that anyone that had an odder name than Rumpelstiltskin should seriously consider changing it, she interrupted him stamping things as politely as she could. "Excuse me, Mr.-" She looked at the nametag dubiously and tried to say it three times properly before he sighed heavily. Clearly, he had run out of patience trying to get people to say it right.

"Kay is fine. Just… Mr. Kay."

She was relieved. "Yes." She agreed and she saw him fighting back the urge to roll his eyes. "I was hoping to get a copy of the blueprints for the library."

"All right." He said tiredly, as if he had been trapped among these records for all eternity instead of twenty-eight years. She wondered who he was prior to this curse. "I need your ID and for you to sign this." He picked up a thick ledger that must have weighed at least twenty pounds off his desk and dropped it on the counter. It banged and she jumped at the loud noise.

"An ID?" She asked.

He stared at her as if she were an idiot. "Yes, your identification."

"Oh." She reached into her small bag and pulled out the only thing she had that might suffice. "Will this work?" She asked, handing him the laminated card that had her name on it.

"A library card?" He asked, un-amused.

"That's all I have."

"No." He smacked it down over the ledger. "This won't work."

Refusing to give up she took it back. "What do I need then?"

"A driver's license or birth certificate."

She only knew what one of those things was and she couldn't drive. "A birth certificate?" She asked. "What's a birth certificate?"

Clearly, he did not trust her or her questions. He was watching her suspiciously for signs this was a joke. "The paper they give you to prove you were born here. Your parents get it at the hospital when you arrive."

She saw a dramatic flaw in this statement. "Isn't that impossible since none of us were actually born here?"

He sucked in a breath through his nose as if she were being purposefully infuriating. "Look, if you don't have either of those things then you don't get the blueprints."

"How do I get a birth certificate then?" She asked reasonably. "Since it's clearly too late for me to be born a second time in this world."

"It should be in your records, and then there's a copy here."

She brightened. She didn't have any records to speak of, but she was already right here. "Can I get my birth certificate please?"

"Not without ID!" He said sharply.

She was baffled. "I can't get my birth certificate from you without an ID, but I can't get my ID to show you to get it without my birth certificate? That doesn't make the slightest bit of sense."

"I don't make the rules." He said firmly.

She opened her mouth to say something, reconsider what he said, and made a second attempt. "Who does?"

"What?"

"Who makes the rules?" She clarified.

"The city counsel." She stared at him blankly. Her innocent bafflement must have worked in her favor at last. Maybe she looked so clueless he simply couldn't believe anyone could feign that type of ignorance with a straight face. "They meet on Wednesday afternoons in the counsel room at the back of the building. You'll have to go and ask them for permission to access the records. If they give it to you I can get you a copy of what you want."

"I have to wait until tomorrow?" She asked with real disappointment. "But I've lost-"

He interrupted her. "Look, lady, I don't make the rules. Now, I have things to do."

"What time on Wednesday?" She insisted before he could dismiss her.

"Three."

"But that's before I close the library." She said in dismay. "I'm not sure I can close it early. No one ever said, and-"

"Does it look to you as if I care?" He asked, now fully exasperated.

"No." She sighed in response.

He narrowed his eyes, waiting for her to say something else. "If you aren't there at three when they start they won't see you."

"All right." She said, figuring this was all she was going to get out of this trip. "Thank you."

Saying nothing he went back to his cluttered desk and plopped down. Glancing around again she left reluctantly, betting she could find the stupid blueprints on her own within an hour. She returned to her apartment reluctantly and spent the evening reading up about this identification nonsense. By the time she fell into a fitful sleep in the wee hours of the morning her head was spinning from all the rules this world had. It was utterly exhausting trying to work all this out, like reading an encyclopedia backwards and upside down at once.

When she woke up an hour or two later she was groggy and had a headache, but was now more determined than ever to get this done. This was something she wanted and she was going to get it. She was going to prove that she could function in this place the same way she could in their old world. Dragging herself off the couch she got ready for the day and went downstairs to open the library.

After an uneventful morning and early afternoon she made a sign to let people know she would be out for the rest of the day and set it carefully in the window of the door. Grabbing her things she stuffed them in her bag, made sure everything was in order, and left well before three to be sure she got there in time. With her luck she would wander in two minutes late and would have to wait another week to get this done.

Walking up the steps to city hall for the second time she opened the door and stepped inside. Remembering that the council met in the back of the building she headed that way. Slightly lost within two turns she was rotating her body around and trying to work out if she wanted to turn left or right in a hallway when she backed straight into someone. She heard a grunt and spun around as she apologized. "I'm so sorry-" She saw who she ran into and reached out to steady him at once. "Rumpelstiltskin?"

He caught whatever snarky comment he was about to hurl at some poor innocent stranger for bumping into him on the tip of his tongue when he saw her. "Belle?" He looked at her in question as he straightened his jacket. "What are you doing here?"

"I have to talk to the city council." She told him. "Do you know what room they meet in?"

"Yes." He said, not moving. "Are you trying to get funding?"

"Funding?" She asked in confusion.

"For the library."

"I really don't know what that means." She told him. "I need to get something from the records department, but Mr. Kay, or whatever his real name is, won't give me anything without a birth certificate. I don't have that and he won't get me a copy of it without one, which makes no sense at all." She suspected some of her frustration was starting to show. "He said I needed permission from the council to have access to it." She indicated the building. "So where do I go?"

He snapped his fingers. A rolled up piece of parchment appeared in his hand wrapped in a gold ribbon. He handed it to her and she took it with interest. "There you are, dearie. I doubt you want to explain to everyone why you never had one, which is what you'll have to do if you want the majority of us to say yes."

"What's this?" She asked.

"A birth certificate."

She pulled the ribbon loose and unrolled the paper. She took it in, wondering why this mattered so very much. "Is it legal for you to make me one?"

"I'm on the city council so we could say I've given you permission to have it if anyone asks. I'm also a lawyer, so technically I've drawn a new one up for you, which is in every way legal."

She wasn't even surprised. "Of course you're on the council." His lip twitched up at her tone. "What's a lawyer?"

"I'll be happy to explain that when I'm not running late."

She supposed that was fair. She needed to go back to the library anyway and re-open it if that was an option. "Are you still coming over tonight?"

"Unless you've changed your mind."

"No." She said as she looked back up at him. "I've been looking forward to it."

He smiled. "Seven then." He nodded to her. "I really do need to go, dearest. I'll see you tonight."

"Have a good meeting." On impulse she leaned in and kissed his cheek. "Thank you for the help. That was much easier than arguing with that man."

He preened a little, pleased with himself for making her life easier. "I'm glad." He brushed his hand over hers as he stepped by her. He was gone a moment later, slipping through a door, and she stood there for a moment looking at the paper before letting out a wicked little giggle and rushing back to the records room. She smacked the paper down on the counter, making Mr. Kay jump this time and her grinning triumphantly.

"I would like the blueprints to the library please."

He glared up at her. "Didn't we go over this yesterday?"

"Yes, and now I have my birth certificate." He got up and checked it thoroughly before giving her the ledger to sign. She opened it and did so with a flourish as he began to rummage about a large pile of papers. As he did that she rolled the certificate back up and thought of something. She had a lot of questions about this place and was tired of staying in the center of town all the time. "Could I get a map of Storybrooke too?"

In response he sent her a glower over his shoulder, but tugged a second large parchment out of a drawer. He walked into a back room and she heard some sort of humming and clunking. She hoped it was coming from some sort of machine she had yet to learn about and suspected it was when he came out with twice as much as what he went in with. He set the original copies down and then rolled up the new ones, which were a lighter shade of paper. Finished, he handed them to her. She thanked him brightly and all but skipped outside.

Returning to the library she re-opened it, beyond pleased that whole thing had taken less than half an hour, and opened the doors to the afternoon sun. Going to her desk she dropped her bag haphazardly and unrolled the blueprints first. The large ream of paper covered most of the circulation desk and she took in the image critically. If she was looking at it right there was no sign of a basement. She saw the main floor of the library, the bathroom in the back for patrons, her apartment, and a small storage area up in the clock tower, which was no doubt where the spare pieces of the large machine were. And even if something else was there it certainly wasn't big enough to be hiding as many books as she was looking for, it really wasn't much bigger than her closet upstairs.

She was undeniably frustrated now. "This is ridiculous!" She cried to no one in particular, and was briefly grateful she was alone in the library at the moment. She didn't need anyone thinking she was talking to herself. Huffing and in a snit she threw herself down onto her chair, not even amused by it rotating right now, which honestly had kept her entertained for hours when she first discovered it a few weeks ago.

Glaring daggers at the blueprints as if they were to be blamed she finally stood up and rolled the paper up. Looking about she decided to store it away next to the file cabinet for the moment. She would take it upstairs with her when she was done since she needed to clean up her apartment before Rumpelstiltskin came over anyway.

The remainder of the afternoon was busy, apparently one of the teachers at the school had assigned a book report and the children were eager to get something new for it, something that they hadn't read at school over and over again in the time loop. By the time five o'clock rolled around she had made seven new library cards and helped fifteen kids make selections. It was both fun and exhausting, and also very informative. She found that the children gave her more information about this town and its inhabitants than anyone since they were genuinely unable to keep thoughts to themselves. Apparently in the other world one little girl had been a bluebird, which caused her all sorts of questions that she knew were inappropriate to ask. She did at least glean that she was being taken care of by a couple that owned the farm she used to nest at, so she felt better about letting her leave.

When she was with her father at the castle, during the ogre war, she had been meticulously careful with the orphans. She was always sure they were safely kept and had food, and sadly there were always too many as their parents were taken by either fighting or hunger. She pushed the thoughts away, finding them sad and hoping those children had grown up happily.

As the last child left with a book she promised to read when she returned titled _Huckleberry Finn_, she locked up and grabbed her papers before heading upstairs. It occurred to her as she cleaned up that she may possibly be taking the lost books to an unhealthy extreme, mostly because her apartment was a wreck. She was neat by nature but had been so distracted things had gotten out of hand. She barely had enough time to clean everything and herself up before there was a knock on her door.

Muttering about pesky hidden basements and unhelpful clerks she ran-hopped toward the door as she tried to get her shoes on as she went. "Coming!" She called right before she bashed into a bookshelf, thrown off balance by her attempt to put on shoes while moving. It teetered dangerously and she caught it with her other heel in her hand and bracing her one shoed foot on the ground. She got it steady before hurrying to the door and shoving her other foot in her second heel. Opening the door breathlessly she smiled at Rumpelstiltskin. He had a grocery bag in one hand and an eyebrow cocked up. "Hello."

"Are you all right?" He asked.

"Yes."

His lip twitched badly. "I heard a crash."

"Did you?" She asked innocently. "I didn't hear anything."

"Really." He asked, completely unconvinced. He knew very well how clumsy she was having saved her from herself on more than one occasion.

"Really." She assured him. Stepping back she allowed him to step inside and shut the door behind him. "How was your meeting?" She asked as a way of distraction as she took the bag from him and walked into her now very clean kitchen.

"Uninteresting." He told her as she set the bag on the counter. "Despite the fact that we have changed worlds, lost Snow White and our dear sheriff, and can't get out of this town, the entire two hours was spent discussing whether or not we needed to add new signs to the park trails."

She raised an eyebrow. "Are you serious?"

"Sadly, I am." He told her as he walked over to her table. "A bit of light reading?" He asked with amusement as he picked up the thick law book she had been reading last night off the table.

"I was trying to figure out how a birth certificate worked." She informed him. "And after reading those for a few hours I'm starting to suspect you may have created this whole world instead of bringing us to one that was already like this."

His head cocked to the side. "No, I only brought us here. No one has enough magic to make a full world. Why would you say that?"

"It just seems like you must have." After looking through a few of those books she understood why he was succeeding here with such ease. "This whole world is run on wordplay and loopholes. It's no wonder you do so well here."

"Is that a compliment?" He asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes." She said as she rummaged through the bag of food he brought over and began to pull things out. She was pleased to find chicken there, because that was a food that made sense to her. "So what is a lawyer?"

"Someone who makes a living off wordplay and loopholes." He said with a grin. He tapped the cover of the book as he closed it. "I have several of these books committed to memory."

"And I thought getting stuck in a cell was painful." She commented.

Despite himself he snorted. "You can tease me all you want, but you should let me teach you. There's some very useful information in these."

She thought there was an easier way to get that useful information. "I'll take your word for it and use my influence over you to answer any wordplay or loophole questions I might have."

"Clever, dearie." He told her as he stepped up next to her. "My sneakiness is rubbing off on you I see. I'm terribly proud."

She laughed and bumped him with her hip gently as she got out the remainder of what he'd brought over. When she saw all the items she brightened noticeably. "Herb chicken and spinach?" She asked hopefully.

He nodded and began to separate the groupings. "I always thought you liked to make this. What do you think?"

"This is a perfect. I did like to make this." She agreed, and she had. "My mother showed me how when I was little. I was never supposed to learn to cook you know. It was nearly obscene for someone of my station to be able to, but she showed me anyway. My father threw a fit a few years later when he found out I could cook and had been sneaking down there in the evening to help the staff." She was amused by the memory. "I convinced him no one in the kitchens knew so they wouldn't get in trouble."

"Why would your mother teach you if you weren't supposed to know?" He asked. "How did she know to begin with?"

"My mother's father bred war horses. My father met her right before a campaign and they fell in love. They got married when he came back the following year." She had always enjoyed that story when her father told her. For months when she was small she had demanded it be her bedtime story and would refuse to go to bed until he told her. "She taught me all sorts of things I wasn't supposed to know. She taught me to read and write, and sums too although I never enjoyed that so much. Teaching me to cook was the last thing, and this was her favorite meal."

"How old were you when she passed?"

"Eight." She told him and answered his next question before he could ask. "She died trying to bring my brother into the world. He died an hour after she did. He tried to come far too early."

"I'm sorry, Belle." He said sincerely.

"Thank you." She answered. "Now, I'm quite excited to eat this again. What do we do to make these machines work?"

He allowed the topic change gracefully. "Before that we need some pans I think."

"I could see how that might be helpful." She said as she pulled a few out. He poked around the cabinets, pulling out a few things to help. When they had everything he deemed necessary for culinary pursuits he began to show her how to use the stove. He was terribly patient and she paid attention as he went through it, asking questions to be sure she understood. Soon they had everything started and she silently bemoaned her lack of experience with the heat settings. She had learned how much wood to keep in a stove over the years so it was instinctual. It was going to take time for these knobs to be used in the same manner.

As the food cooked and they waited to turn the chicken over Rumple spoke hesitantly. "Belle?"

"Yes?" She asked calmly, knowing something was about to happen from his tone. She regretted whatever it was because she had been enjoying this lesson.

"I have something for you." He said as she turned all her attention to him.

"You didn't need to get me anything."

He nodded a little in acknowledgement; understanding that she was saying she wanted to spend time with him, not have him shower her with gifts. "I'd like to preface the gesture with a very firm admission that it isn't strictly a gift."

"All right." She said, now both curious and apprehensive.

Reaching into his pocket he pulled out a beautiful gold bracelet. It was made up of dozens and dozens of strands of wisp thin threads of gold held together at both ends by a large and ornate clasp that was in the shape of a blooming rose. Having seen any number of expensive and magical things in her time with him even she was a little stunned by the simplistic beauty of the thing. It was very much to her taste on top of it, which she suspected he knew. "Did you make that?" She asked.

"I did." He agreed, unclasping it. He held it toward her, but didn't try to put it on. "Before you take it I want you to know I've spun a spell into the gold." She looked up at him sharply. "I know you don't like that I've been using magic, but I am as I am. I'm not sure I'll ever be able to stop using it as long as I have access to it, and it's abundantly clear I will find a way to gain that access." He kept on before she could say anything. "Now, we can fight about that in a moment if you'd like, but before we do I want you to understand what I've done."

He watched her then, waiting for a reply of some kind. "What have you done?"

Relieved that she hadn't scolded or threatened he continued. "When you went missing it scared me, terribly. I've weaved the gold so that it will allow me to know where you are. I know you value your independence and your freedom. I'm in no way trying to curb your right to make your own fate, but you've lost too much, been hurt too much, because I didn't know where you were and that you needed help." She kept quiet, sensing he needed to say more. "It was because of me that you were captured. You can tell me it isn't until you're blue in the face but I know you never would have been bothered if it weren't for me. This bracelet will allow me to find you, regardless of where you are or what magic is trying to hide you from me. I swear I will never use it unless I truly feel you're in danger if you agree to put it on."

"What if someone takes it off me?" She asked.

"The bracelet will mark them for me so I can find out what's happened. Even so, the magic will be strong enough to cling to you for several weeks. I'll be able to track you for that long no matter where you go."

"It sounds like a powerful spell."

He nodded seriously, not trying to deny or downplay what he'd done. Maybe he was changing, even if it was only a little at a time. "Yes, it is."

She stared at him for a long moment as she considered this. He gave her the time, not pushing or moving in any direction, allowing her to decide. Finally, slowly, she held her wrist out. "Can I use it to call you? In case something happens and you don't know you need to start tracking me?"

He paused as he was about to put it around her wrist. "Would you like to be able to do that?"

She supposed it was counterproductive to start quibbling over adding more to an object she suspected was hugely powerful already. She didn't want to contemplate how much magic he had used to make something that could track her _anywhere_ regardless of other spells trying to prevent that. If she was going to allow him that sort of access to her life it would be smart to be sure he could tell if she needed help. That could have saved them both a lot of pain in the past. She really didn't want to repeat that again. "If you can." She admitted.

Twisting his hands he let the gold pool into one of his palms. He stared at it intently and she felt the crackle of silent power and smelled ozone as he worked. Little lines of magic and light zinged over the piece of jewelry, surrounding it and melting into it all at once. She watched in silent awe as he poured energy into it, never blinking and hardly even breathing as he focused. Then, abruptly, it was over. He rolled his shoulder slightly, the only indication that what he had done was as hard as she suspected it was, and held the bracelet back out to her. The gold shimmered just a little more than was normal, but she allowed him to put it on her. A small spurt of magic like a cool zing ran out of it and into her skin and he held her wrist to keep her from jerking. "It won't hurt you." He promised. "The magic is doing what it's been told to do. Give it a moment to work and you won't feel anything else."

She was still until it stopped and he nodded, satisfied with his work. "Thank you, Rumpelstiltskin."

"Thank you for wearing it." He said quietly, letting her go, his fingertips tickling over her inner wrist. She sucked in a small breath at the feeling, but he didn't notice.

She looked down at the bracelet and couldn't help but think how really beautiful it was. No one had ever gone to the trouble of making her something before. Not that she was unfamiliar with gifts, and he had given her this apartment, but this was different. She knew very well he could have put the spell on anything. He didn't need to go to all the trouble of making her something, certainly not something so beautiful. She had never seen him spin gold so thin either. Shifting closer she kissed his cheek. "It's beautiful." She told him. "I didn't know you could spin gold this fine."

"I never had a reason to before." He said with a shrug, but she saw he was pleased with himself all the same, in the silent way he had about him here, but there was something else too. There was a strange kind of discomfort about him. "We can start the spinach now."

She watched him for a second. "You never let me say thank you."

"There's no need." He replied, not looking at her now.

"I want to." She told him. "Why does it bother you?"

"A quirk." He replied.

She thought there was more to it than that but didn't want to push. They had been sharing a lot recently and she thought this could wait for a different day. Looping her arm in his she squeezed it warmly. "Rumpelstiltskin?"

"Yes?" He asked a little warily.

"Thank you for the bracelet." She smiled and felt herself blushing a little. "No one ever made me anything before. It really is beautiful."

He opened his mouth, closed it, and then tried again looking utterly stunned by her sincerity. "You're welcome."

Her smiled grew and his lips turned up a little at the corners. "There, that was better." He simply looked at her and she leaned more closely against him. "Spinach then?"

"Yes." He agreed quietly before clearing his throat. When he spoke again his voice was stronger. "Yes, the spinach. All we need is that pot." She let him go so she could get it. The lesson continued, and just like when they had gone for hamburgers a lovely calm companionship settled between them. It stayed that way until he left very late that night, later than either of them intended, but he had purposefully drawn her into a debate that she refused to loose no matter how playful it was. Eventually he called a draw to it and she knew it was because he thought she needed to sleep. She walked him to the door and he paused, hovering in front of her like a shy teenager who had come to call.

She always found this side of him odd when he was so brazenly fierce in other aspects of his life. He claimed to be a coward and yet he had done amazingly brave things. Perhaps though he didn't see it that way. Perhaps all he saw was a road increasingly depleted of options on the journey to find his son. He was no stranger to hopelessness or pain. Maybe to him doing what he had was not bravery, but simple acts of desperation of a father whose son was far out of reach. Thinking that was close to it she once again willingly became the brave one, knowing that was what he needed from her and finding she didn't mind.

Stepping close to him she titled her head up in invitation. His lovely dark eyes shimmered as he leaned in and kissed her gently. Warmth filled her belly and she shifted closer. One of his hands settled on her hip and guided her fully against him. He deepened the kiss a little and her hands settled uncertainly on his shoulders. The moment she did he pulled back, coming back to kiss her cheek before straightening up, although his hand remained a warm weight on her hip. "I had a wonderful evening, Belle. Thank you for having me."

"I enjoyed myself as well." She told him. "Maybe we could do this again soon."

"I would like that." He said softly. "Goodnight, Belle." Leaning in a second time he kissed her cheek gently. "Let me know when you'd like our next cooking lesson to be."

"I will." She promised. "Goodnight, Rumpelstiltskin." Smiling at her he let go of her hip and caressed her face too briefly before he opened the door and left. It only took her a few minutes to regret his absence because it seemed once he was gone the shadows that had fled in fear of his presence came back with a vengeance. Wondering what sort of magic managed that she went to her bookshelf and turned on the small desk lamp. Compared to Rumpelstiltskin it was a small deterrent to the darkness and she found herself staring at the little lamp most of the night as she lay on the couch, wondering what it was going to take to drive the nightmares from her sleeping mind.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

When she heard the familiar sharp rap on the door she all but bounced over to it. Rumpelstiltskin had been coming over twice a week for over a month now to teach her how to work the kitchen properly. Honestly, after the first two times she could have managed on her own, but she liked having him over and he liked being here with her. It was fun for both of them, she suspected in slightly different ways, but it was fun all the same.

Opening the door with a grin had him smiling in return. He had a bag in his hand and she took it, dancing backwards. "What did you bring today, Rumpelstiltskin?"

He walked into her apartment, his eyes following her every move. "You could simply open the bag and see."

"That takes some of the fun out of it." She said teasingly as he followed her retreat into her apartment.

He chuckled as he closed the door behind him and began to tease her back, which was always a good sign. He never played if something was wrong or if he was in a bad mood. "It's something we haven't had yet."

She hummed in thought, liking that he was giving her clues today. "Let's see… dragon eggs?"

His lip curled up in amusement. "No."

She spun around as she got to the entrance of the kitchen. "Ostrich?"

He was trying not to laugh. "Afraid not, dearie."

Immediately her own guess distracted her. "Can we go see a real ostrich when you manage to get us out of this town?" She asked, having read a book with the odd birds in it and wanting to know if they really were as large as the text described. It was simply hard to imagine that any bird could be as tall as her ceiling. That might possibly be even more interesting to see than a unicorn.

"If you'd like." He answered, leaning on his cane as he stood right inside the doorway. He was clearly amused that she wanted to see one and she thought she should have asked him to take her to see all sorts of creatures while she was at the castle with him. She was sure he would have, or at least brought them to the front garden for her to admire. The last three months she lived there she had noticed his interest in making her smile, she really should have taken greater advantage, although she knew very well she had been to shy to ask for something like that before. Even now she doubted she would manage more than making it a request, one that he could easily say no to, or one she would allow him to forget.

"They keep them at zoos in this part of the world." She said helpfully, hoping that he wouldn't forget. "Have you ever been to a zoo?"

"Not unless you count Granny's at the dinner rush."

She giggled at that, getting back on track. "Did you bring beefburgers pretending to be ham?"

"Close." He answered.

"Really?"

His eyes glittered with mirth. "No."

She pouted at him blatantly and his expression simply went slack when her bottom lip jutted out. She immediately tucked that information away for later as she set the bag on the counter. He rarely lost complete control of his facial expressions, even around her, and she knew that her pout had utterly derailed him. It made her feel quite the flirt, something she had never felt before this moment. Almost at once her self-esteem went up as a feminine thrill flowed through her. The last few weeks she had found a new way to interact with him, one where she appeared to have nearly all the control, and she liked that. She enjoyed this strange and exciting dance they were sharing together, enjoyed getting close and then spinning mischievously away so he would follow her. She even enjoyed the few times he did the same thing to her to be sure she would follow him back, reassuring himself of her interest and affection.

All of it was fun, and exciting, and thrilling. It wasn't the painful clash of wrenching heartache that had thrown them at one another before. Not one of their meetings had ended badly or painfully since they had gone out for hamburgers and she finally felt really comfortable with him. This new normal was nice, better than nice, and she was becoming more confident about what they had. Gradually, admittedly very gradually, he was opening up to her. He was allowing her in one small, shuffling step at a time and she was content with the progress. She had known it would take a long time, and was even more sure of that now, but her progress, while slow, was steady. She had learned when to pull her curiosity back, where to take her time with him, and when good times to get information would be. She was learning other things about him too, things that had her near to blushing just thinking about. Rumpelstiltskin, she found, could be affectionate when no one else was watching and her apartment certainly provided them with privacy. Even so, from what she had gleaned from Ruby, they had done relatively little of the things that most couples did.

She really needed to stop thinking about this right now or she would blush and he would ask her about it, no doubt tricking the real reason for it out of her before she knew what happened. He was far too clever for his own good some of the time. Opening the bag with a flourish she looked down and managed to be distracted from her less than pristine thoughts. "Fish?"

He stepped up next to her. "Trout actually."

"I haven't had fish in ages." She said excitedly. For some reason it wasn't very popular here, despite the town being right on the edge of an ocean. Like so many things here it made little sense, especially when there were fishing boats aplenty. It seemed that they were simply for show, because they were sorely lacking in fisherman to take the boats out, assuming they could with the line in place. She had no idea how far that extended into the sea and maybe no one else was either. She didn't blame people for staying well within the boarders. No one wanted to forget who they were again, or the people that they loved. "This will be great." She set the fish out and then pulled out a bag filled with rice and some mixed vegetables. This was going to be delicious. "I've never made rice before." She told him, although she had eaten it at Granny's on more than one occasion. Mostly with a wonderful chicken dish covered in an orange sauce. It was one of her new favorites in this world.

"It's not hard." He promised as he started pulling out pots and pans. "A lot like potatoes." She thought he knew her kitchen better than her at this point. When he had gotten everything he needed he hummed. "But I should wash my hands. I've been in my shop all day." He looked at the sink and she followed his line of sight, he was looking for soap that she didn't have.

"I ran out in here. There's some in the bathroom." She really needed to swing by the pharmacy and pick a few things up, but she had gotten caught up with Ruby this afternoon and had all but raced home to beat him here. She would have felt horrible if he had come and found her gone. She had no doubt he would take that badly, much like a loyal dog took pain from a missing owner. She couldn't believe she just made that comparison and tried to shake it off. Rumpelstiltskin was not a dog. If he resembled any animal at all it was a persnickety alley cat.

He turned out of the kitchen looking down at his hands as if he could sense dust on them. "I'll be right back."

"All right." She said as she started getting other things out. She would set the table now and then she could help him cook more today than she had previously. At first she had been holding back because she didn't know what to do. The last week or so she had really been letting him do the work because she enjoyed his cooking and he seemed to enjoy being able to impress her in a normal, non-magical way. Really, he was amazingly good at this despite his previous aversion to the task. Maybe it had been boredom that had really turned him to cooking more than hunger or a desire for home cooked meals. If anything she would have guessed he would have actively avoided the task if only because it reminded him of her.

She heard the water turn on in the distance and hummed happily as she put things in order. She had to move a small pile of books to the windowsill to make room for plates, but that was no matter. When he came back she was poking a fork in line with a knife so the whole thing was set properly. When she was done she looked up, smiling, until she saw his face. He was watching her carefully, the same way he had when he realized how terribly hungry she had been that first morning she was with him. Her stomach instantly dropped to her feet. "What's wrong?"

He watched her for another long second before he spoke, considering his words carefully. "Belle, where are you sleeping?"

The question confused her. "Sleeping?"

He pressed his lips together. "It's clearly not your room. The same pillow is on the floor from when I was here two weeks ago and everything is covered in dust." She flinched at that and his tone lost all sharpness. She must have knocked the pillow down when she fled so long ago now, and she kept the rest of her apartment so clean it was no wonder he notice what must now be a noticeable layer of grime on everything, even if he only glanced in from the doorway as he passed. It was her own fault for not shutting the door. Since she never even looked in there in order to avoid the fear she hadn't realized he would notice as he walked by, but she should have. He noticed everything, of course he would notice this as well. "What's going on?"

"It's ridiculous." She said softly, feeling stupid and crazy. Neither of which she was comfortable with showing him. She was the stable one. She was the brave one. She was the strong one. What was going on with her sleeping demonstrated not one of those traits and no doubt hinted to him that there were certainly deeper issues at work.

"Try me." He invited, clearly open to hearing whatever it was she had to say.

Gods, she really didn't want to say, but it wasn't right to keep that from him when he was opening up to her the way he was, especially when he was asking so directly. That would be more than hypocritical; it would be a betrayal of what they had been so painstakingly building the last few months. She had never been fond of lying and doing that now, with him, would set a very bad precedent on fairness and trust. "I've been sleeping on the couch."

"Why?" He asked with forced patience.

"The first day I was here I opened the window in the room and the wind caught the door." He was confused, it showed in his frown and the lines on his forehead. "It slammed closed and I thought I was trapped inside. I can't go in there now." He was looking at her in a way that made her heart hurt as he comprehended what she was saying. "I told you it was ridiculous." She mumbled, looking away from him as she straightened the cutlery with meticulous care.

He stepped up to her and drew her slowly to him, catching her hand and stilling it, kissing her temple when he got her away from the table. "It's not." He said gently. "It's not at all ridiculous, Belle."

She had her eyes pressed tightly closed. "I used to be brave."

"You never stopped being brave." He told her with conviction. "You are the bravest person I've ever known."

She let out a strangled laugh. "I can't even go in my own bedroom. I hate the staircase up here so much I run up and down it every time I leave or come home. It took me a week to work up the nerve to go into that stupid bedroom again to shut the window and now I can't look at chains either after Ruby locked me up downstairs."

"She what?" He asked, his head jerking up and away from hers.

"She thought she was going to eat me the first time she turned into a wolf here." She said, dismissing the incident as Ruby's fault. She had been scared and done the only thing she could think of to keep her safe, even if it was the worst thing Ruby could have done for her mindset. Still, there was no way for her to have known that when she had never told her friend what happened to her. "But I think she forgot it happened in all the ruckus and I was there for hours before Granny came and got me out, but she couldn't find the key so I had to wait another hour for her to find David to dig through the sheriff's station to find spares."

"Please let me curse them." He pleaded, only a little serious. "They would make lovely snails."

She ignored that since it was mostly a joke and she wasn't overly amused with her behavior, or that she couldn't seem to change it. "I'm not all the way right anymore, Rumple."

Cupping her cheek he looked dead into her eyes. "You are perfectly right." He emphasized it with a light kiss.

She knew he was lying to make her feel better. It was kind, but deep down she knew it wasn't helpful or beneficial. "You're sweet to say it." She whispered. "But let's not lie to one another." He hated this, he hated this and she saw it in his eyes. She saw that she was right about not being right anymore. She saw him trying to find words to make her feel better without lying even as he knew it would only hurt her more for him to say them. She felt bad putting him in this sort of spot, but what else was there to say? She had been the one that insisted on honesty, it wasn't fair to ask that and not give it at the same time. "It's still better than the way I was before." She assured him, reaching up and straightening his tie with light hands, trying to comfort him as much as her. "Hopefully you can get used to my new quirks. I seem to have collect a few."

He kissed her forehead again. "I love you."

She jumped a little in surprise. He hadn't said that to her in a long time, although she never doubted that it had changed. But since they started this, their new beginning, he hadn't said it. Warmth spread through her, easing the embarrassment and shame, and she leaned in and set her head on his shoulder, wrapping her arms loosely around his waist. "I love you too."

He rubbed her back in soothing circles, and she relaxed into him. It was easy to loose herself in him, which was one of the reasons she had left. Being this close to him addled her mind and made her loose perspective. They couldn't work on their relationship or themselves if they were constantly distracted. However, right now, she was perfectly content to let everything else go. For the moment she was willing to let him assure her in this way that she wasn't so broken that he would abandon her or turn from her. It was an amazingly powerful thing to be accepted for what she was. They stood there for a minute, until he was sure she was stable again, before speaking. "I have an idea."

"You always have an idea." She whispered into his jacket. She thought it must be exhausting to be in his head most of the time. He never let himself stop thinking, assuming that it was even an option for him. She wasn't sure he could stop thinking with how smart he was.

He smiled reassuringly at her and found her hand, unwrapping her from around him with gentle care. "Come with me." He led her out of the kitchen and through the living room. When she saw he was aiming for her bedroom she baulked, but he held her tightly as he spoke reassuringly. "I'm not going to make you go in." With that reassurance she stopped trying to pull away from him, although she hung back so much that by the time they got to the room her arm was fully outstretched between them.

He stopped in front of the door, still propped open with the atlas, and let her go after a firm squeeze to her hand. He stepped into the room so he was facing the door and pushed the book to the side with his cane. That done, he set his fingertips on the wood and a blast of purple magic covered it. When the smoke dissipated she saw the door was simply gone as if it had never been there. Even the spaces where the hinges had been were now smooth wood, painted the same as the rest of the doorframe as if there had never been a cut in the wood framing to place them there. All she could do was look at the place it had been for a moment, wondering why she hadn't thought of that herself. It was a simple and elegant solution to her problem. "There now." He stepped back into the hall with her. "You can't very well be locked inside when there isn't a door. Perhaps that'll help." Before she could say anything he caught her hand again and took her back to the kitchen as if nothing out of the ordinary at all had happened. "Are you ready to learn to cook rice?"

Stunned speechless that he wasn't going to insist she try to go in now, or even ask if she would think about it, she nodded as she watched him carefully. She had been more than half ready for him to tell her he didn't want her anymore when he found out about this, and was certain once she told him the rest he would say it without a doubt. But he had simply listened, thought it over, and come up with at least a temporary and logical solution to the problem. She wasn't entirely sure how to take this and in her confusion fell into their lesson silently. By the time the food was done half an hour later she felt normal again, at ease with him, and grateful for the way he had handled it. It helped that he had coaxed her back out of her head with such expertise, prompting her to help, ask questions, and tell him about the mundane details of her day to day life as he ran his hands lightly over her back, or hips, or shoulders as they moved around the kitchen.

When they sat down to eat she attempted to start a conversation without his help. She had no doubt her subdued attitude was worrying him even if he was making no sign of it. It was simply out of character for her to act like this. Even when she was quiet she wasn't radiating this horrible nervous energy he was surely picking up on. "Where did you get the fish?"

"Marco. He's been passing his time fishing and can't eat everything he snares." He shrugged. "I thought it would be a nice change from chicken and beef."

It certainly was. "We used to have fish all the time when I was little, living in the marshes. I always liked catfish." He raised an eyebrow, but she kept on before he could say anything. "What was your favorite meal when you were little?"

His shrugged. "I didn't have one."

"When you were older then." She asked, thinking it was odd he didn't have something he preferred. She thought all children had favorite meals, but maybe she was wrong about that.

He considered that seriously, which was rather amusing to watch. It was like she had asked him to pick the most useful spell to stop drought or something equally as important. "Cornbread." He settled on at last.

Her lips twitched like mad. "Cornbread?"

"With butter." He agreed. "Butter was too expensive to get most of the time."

She accepted that, although it was upsetting to know how hard his life had been for a long time. She had never had overly much in the way of wealth, and food had been hard to come by during the war, but before that even their poorest subsistence farmers had access to enough food. She said what she was thinking before she really considered it all the way through. "I think you had a very bad ruler in your land."

"Most rulers are." He replied sharply.

She paused with her fork buried in the fish. "That's not true."

"Isn't it?" He asked with a raised eyebrow. "You're really the exception to the rule, no pun intended."

She was quiet for a moment as she gathered her thoughts. She didn't want to make him angry and could tell this was a sensitive subject. That didn't mean she didn't want to talk about it. "Why do you think that?" She settled on. It might be easier to talk about if she understood why he thought what he thought.

"Because I've dealt with the large majority of them." He answered, clearly forcing his voice to a normal tone. The odd pause before she spoke alerted him that he had erred where she was concerned. "Very few asked for things that would help their subjects. Everything was based on their wants and whims. You're certainly the only one that was fully willing to give up something important."

"My father gave me up."

He sighed, as if he knew his words were going to start a fight. "Your father didn't give you up. He simply couldn't keep you there. He would have let your village burn before giving you to me." He continued on grudgingly. "But I would have done the same for my son, so I can hardly fault him. Selflessness is a trait most people lack."

There was another pause and he watched her as she thought, his eyes fixated on her, waiting for her to react negatively to his blunt opinion of both her social class and her father. When she finally spoke she wondered if it would be her that started the fight no matter how reasonable she sounded. "You offer your magic to desperate and terrified people and you expect valor and honesty. How would you act if the situation were reversed?"

Something went off inside him, blowing the peaceful atmosphere into a boiling mass of rage and emotion. How she knew that she had hit a soft spot she wasn't sure because his facial expression was controlled, but the chill that filled the room was so palpable that it took all her willpower not to cower away from him. In front of her was no longer the sweet, if trying man that she was in love with. Instead she truly saw a monster lurking inside him for the first time since she tried to break his curse. Despite herself she froze like a rabbit facing a dragon. Whatever expression settled on her face at least knocked him far enough out of his rage to politely excuse himself. "I think I'd best go." He stood up, setting his napkin next to his untouched plate. He didn't look at her as he turned away. "Goodnight, my dear."

Before she could gather her wits about her he was out the door, snapping it shut behind him. Unsure of what had happened she got up hastily and rushed to the door. She didn't want to fight, but she certainly didn't want to leave him in that state or wonder what she had said. Ripping the door open she didn't see anything but the stairs. It was as if he had simply vanished, and since she knew that was a very real possibility she was sure he had used his magic to whisk himself away. Thinking that was some type of cheating and they should set down rules about him poofing away in clouds of purple smoke when she couldn't do the same she went back in long enough to grab a light jacket and her keys before turning off the lights and leaving. She simply left the food out to be dealt with later, regretting that she hadn't gotten to taste the fish.

Hurrying down the stairs she walked out into the brisk evening air and headed toward his shop quickly. She found it empty, or at least it looked empty, and the door wouldn't open. She didn't stay long; instead she turned and walked toward his house. It took her over half an hour to walk there since it was at the edge of town, but she didn't waver in her intent, although she did seriously begin to consider learning to drive a car. She was out of breath by the time she walked up his porch and she was cursing herself as a fool for not changing out of her heels and into a better pair of shoes.

Getting to the door she knocked firmly. Her only answer was an odd feeling as something brushed over her body. She yelped at the sensation, and tried to bat away whatever it was, whatever spell was on her, and it ignored her as it coated her to the top of her head. As soon as it did the magic vanished and she wondered what had just happened to her. Deciding to ignore it for the moment she knocked again. "Rumpelstiltskin?" She called. There was no answer and she pressed her lips together as annoyance began to war with her worry. He was either gone or purposefully ignoring her, which bothered her far more than any fight they might get in. She would much prefer a yelling match and harsh words or cruel jibes to being ignored. She had been ignored far too long to have it happen again.

Muttering about frustrating, evasive imps under her breath she left the porch and walked around the house. She jumped awkwardly over his hip high fence, being hampered by both her dress and poor natural grace, and somehow managed to land on her feet in his backyard, although she wobbled and stumbled badly before catching her balance. Brushing her skirt back down with several impatient snaps of her wrists she marched toward his workshop, skirting the pool that took over part of his yard. As she came around a bush she saw the light on in the small basement window and knew she had found him.

Descending the small set of outside stairs she got to the door and felt the same magic start to wind around her here as well and snapped at it in annoyance. "That's enough of that!" To her surprise it backed off and she glared at the invisible magic as she turned the doorknob. She wasn't sure if she was surprised it wasn't locked or not surprised at all as she stepped inside. She had never been in this workroom before, hadn't ventured in here when she lived with him for that one week, but she much preferred the one at the castle. At least there it was in a tower and had windows all the way around it. This place was just too much like the dungeon for her to fully handle, but this was where he ran to so this was where she would deal with the situation.

He wasn't hard to find. The sound of his spinning wheel creaking as he turned it led her to him, and she came around a corner to see him sitting there transforming straw into gold. Letting out a soft sigh at the sight of him stiff and blank, his long, nimble hands turning the wheel at a measured rhythm, she moved to him quietly. She knew this was where he would be no matter what building or room she found him in, sitting in front of his wheel trying to forget. He had moved his wheel so often in this world she wondered if he was trying to find the right place for it, or if the wheel itself was the right place and he took it with him wherever he went to work. He didn't acknowledge her as she walked in front of him, or even when she sat down beside him on the narrow stool, so close that she was forced to press against him or fall off. She sat there quietly for several minutes, giving him a chance to adjust to her being there before speaking. She didn't want to risk another retreat when a little patience could prevent it.

Finally, when she sensed he was willing to listen she spoke, having had time to think of what she wanted to say on the walk over. "This is a beautiful wheel, Rumpelstiltskin, and you can do something truly wondrous with it, but it can only drive the memories away for so long. Eventually you're going to have to stop trying to forget."

"You think I don't know that?" He asked quietly, his temper cooled so far she never would have guessed he lost it unless she had been there. He was a mercurial man if ever there was one.

"I think you're used to living by yourself." She answered gently. "I think you're trying so hard to forget the bad things that you've forgotten some of the good things along with them." She sighed. "Or maybe you never got to learn the good things to begin with." Reaching out she caught one of his hands, stilling it and bringing the machine to a halt. "I'm sorry I upset you. That wasn't my intention."

He let out a slow breath. "I know that."

"Running away doesn't help anything." She told him.

"I don't want to hurt you." He said, his voice strained. "I don't want to fight with you."

"We're going to fight, Rumple." She told him reasonably. "Everybody fights. That's just life." She tugged his hand down with hers gently so they were resting on his leg. "Then they make up." He said nothing and she rubbed her thumb over his.

He looked down at their hands before speaking. "Why do you keep coming back?"

"I thought I'd made that pretty clear." She answered, wondering why this kept coming up.

"No one comes back to me." He told her, his voice breaking, and she understood why. "No one comes back and you were dead. You haunted me, Belle. I couldn't forget you." He looked up at her face. "I don't know what to do with you."

She smiled slightly, answering with gentle understanding. "I know, but you're trying. No one else would try so hard for me."

"Belle." He whispered, leaning in and kissing her with near desperation, trying to comfort, or reassure, or connect with her. Maybe he was trying to do all of that. She didn't care as she pressed back against him with equal need. He let her hand go so he could cup her face, holding her to him. Her fingers tangled into the lapels of his jacket and she moaned into him as heat suffused her. He groaned into her mouth, holding her for another few moments before tearing himself away. As she panted she felt him shaking against her and she reached up to catch his hands. He set his forehead against hers and closed his eyes, as if he were trying to memorize this moment, to store it in a place that no one would ever be able to tarnish it. "Belle." He whispered again.

"I'm going to keep coming back." His whole body hitched, although he kept his eyes tightly closed. "Okay?" He nodded slightly, pressing his forehead harder against hers. They sat like that for a long minute as she tried to give him the time he needed to integrate this, however, the basement was getting to her and finally she couldn't stand it anymore. "Can we go upstairs? Or outside?" His eyes opened and she tried to keep her voice steady. "It's just… dark down here."

He cupped her face again. "Of course." He sat away from her before getting to his feet. "This was thoughtless of me."

She followed him up and attempted to stop the guilt before it could set in. "It's fine." She assured him. "I don't mind so much when I'm with someone else." Mostly she didn't mind so much when it was him and she knew he would be able to get her out regardless of what the situation was. "It's just easier when I'm not- when I'm not-"

"In the dark." He finished gently as he took her hand and headed for the door that led up to the yard.

"Yes." She agreed, relieved he didn't want her to explain anymore. He took her outside and shut the door behind them after allowing her to precede him. She felt the magic lick at her ankles again and tried to stomp on it. He glanced over at the sound and she snapped down at the ground. "What is that?"

"A recognition spell." He waved his hand and the feeling stopped. "It was getting to know you. It shouldn't bother you again." His hand waved back the other way. "There."

"What did you do?"

"Told it you were part of the household." He replied as he walked up the small set of stairs to the yard after her. "It keeps anyone who isn't out."

"Is that really necessary?"

"Yes." He said without hesitation.

She shook her head a little and came to a halt between the pool and the house. "Do you want to talk about why I made you angry?"

He looked terribly tired. "Not tonight."

"All right." She agreed and he eyed her as if it were a trick. "Not tonight." He nodded slightly, relief evident in his expression. "But soon."

He accepted that and they stood in front of one another for a few moments. "I think our meal must be cold by now." He finally said.

"I expect so."

He indicated the house. "Let me make you something else and then I'll drive you home."

She looked at the house for a moment before shaking her head. He was crestfallen for a moment before she shifted and slid her arm into his. "I'd rather you walk me home."

"Walk you?" He asked.

"It won't hurt your leg will it?" She asked, because she knew she would be better able to handle things if she was outside a little longer.

"No." He said.

"And we can put the fish in the microwave can't we?" She asked. "Because it heats things."

His lip twitched slightly. "We could."

"Good." She tugged a little and they headed out of the yard. He took her to a door in the fence and she rolled her eyes when she saw it. Of course she had jumped it when this was infinitely easier. As they came around the house she made a request. "Rumple?"

"Yes?" He asked.

"Will you teach me to drive?"

"Erm." He managed eloquently before catching himself. "Drive?" He asked warily.

"Yes, a car." She clarified helpfully.

He looked worried, no doubt imagining all sorts of disaster with her clumsy self in a large machine. "If you'd like." He finally got out haltingly, clearly finding no legitimate reason to say no.

She tried to suppress her smile. "We could start Saturday afternoon."

"Yes, well-"

She cut him off before he could come up with an excuse. This was a different sort of situation than her wanting to see an ostrich. This was a useful life skill to know here. "Saturday then."

"Saturday." He agreed with a sigh and when she giggled he sent her a look that told her he was bracing himself for all sorts of disaster and mischief. She thought it was rather amusing that it was now him looking at her that way instead of the other way around. She gave him a sweet smile and kissed his cheek as they walked and all the fight just drained out of him. Finding that interesting she filed it away with the pouting and wondered what else there was for her to put it that little section of information she was gathering.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

"Stop!" He all but shouted and she slowed the car to a stop in the empty school parking lot. Putting it in park she looked over at him with sheer exasperation. He was holding onto the handle of the door as if his life depended on it and she was loosing patience as she brought the car to a standstill for the twelfth time for no apparent reason that she could discern.

"What now?" She asked, for once being the one whose temper was fraying. They were getting nowhere in this lesson, literally.

"Are you sure you really want to continue?" He asked, nearly pleading with her to give up.

"Oh for heaven sake, Rumple!" She snapped. "It's bad enough you tricked me three weeks ago about this!"

He looked offended. "Trick you? I didn't trick you! You're the one set on following the rules in this land! How is it my fault you had to pass a paper exam prior to operating a motor vehicle? I didn't make that law!"

She narrowed her eyes. He had done it on purpose to stall them actually getting in a car and she knew it. She had all but bounded into his shop after she closed the library that weekend, beyond eager to learn this, and instead of leading her out to his mechanical coach as she had been anticipating he had presented her with a very dusty and battered looking operating manual. The thing looked as if it had been run over at least twice, and that suspicion was confirmed when she turned it over and saw a tire track along half of the binding. When she asked him what it was he had informed her, with not nearly enough suppressed relief to be at all believable, that she first had to pass a written exam before she was allowed to drive, even with a teacher. If she didn't have a permit she could be fined or arrested, which he said was the last thing he wanted. She suspected it was the second to last thing he wanted, the first being her not getting behind the wheel.

Deflated and annoyed she had accused him justifiably of treachery, and took the book from him in a huff. He had been trying to defend himself since then, but was gaining no ground with her. It hardly helped that when she came back into the shop two days later with her permit, having promptly committed the book to memory and then acing the exam the next morning while Prince James administered it at the sheriffs department, that he looked so utterly crestfallen by her swift success. She had no doubt he had been hoping she either failed the test entirely or it would take her several weeks to study for it, giving him more time to come up with a reasonable Rumpelstiltskin sort of excuse to get himself out of this. Since then he had been hemming and hawing around the issue as cleverly as he was able, which was saying something, until she put her foot down. Actually she stomped it hard enough to set some of his wares rattling, but that was neither here nor there. Her obvious annoyance over him ignoring her wish to learn, and her subsequent and candid irritation over it had him all but cowering in her presence. For once she didn't even feel bad about it he was acting so ridiculous. He had finally given in and taken her to the parking lot as if he were being led to the hangman's noose.

They had been here for an hour, forty minutes of which he had refused to get out of the drivers seat as he insisted on going over every single detail of the car, twice, before she snapped at him to trade places with her before she made him. He had taken the threat seriously and changed places with her with as much dignity as he could muster. The last twenty minutes had been absurd. She hadn't even made a full circuit of the parking lot yet as he kept insisting she was going too fast, or forgot her turn signal, or remarked rather frantically on the dampness of the pavement and the fear the car might careen wildly out of control into the school building and kill them both, and quite possibly several children to boot, which seemed unlikely as it was Sunday and there was no school. He kept muttering about hydroplaning under his breath. She might have taken that seriously had she actually managed to get the car over five miles an hour for more than two seconds in a row, or if there had been more than a single puddle lurking about the area in what he must consider quiet the menacing manner.

"You tricked me!" She insisted, because he had. "And you did it on purpose! You know how I feel about that!"

"Dearie-"

She cut him off. "Rumple, if you do not start teaching me how to drive this car properly I swear by all that I consider holy I will drive us straight into that elm tree over there and kill us both!" She pointed firmly at a large tree in particular that was full on the other side of the lot from where they were, perhaps two hundred yards or so past the play set. "It would be worth my life to be sure you were dead at this point! You are driving me utterly mad and I have had quite enough of your nonsense for the next several weeks!"

He pressed his lips together and sulked, actually sulked, in his seat. "I'm trying to make sure that you learn to drive safely." He said reasonably.

"You are trying to be sure I don't learn at all!" She all but shouted. Really, she was loosing her temper.

"That isn't true." He retorted at once.

"It is true!" She snapped back.

He latched onto that at once. "If you're going to get this emotional about it then perhaps it would be a good idea if we stopped for the day."

Her eyelid twitched, she felt it happen. All at once he had thrown her from frustratingly annoyed with him to really angry. She wasn't sure he had ever truly seen her in that state before, and so wasn't at all equipped to deal with the consequences. Oh, he had angered her before, most notably when he first sent her away from the dark castle, but that had been heavily shaded with hurt, regret, and a terrible sort of disappointment. Right now she was simply enraged with no other emotion to temper it down. Her voice dropped to a near normal volume. "You feel _I'm_ the one being emotional?"

To his credit he was not a stupid man. At once he realized that not only had he erred badly in that statement, but that there was no good way to respond to that question. Sadly, his intelligence wasn't so great as to get him to keep his mouth shut, which in her opinion was the only thing that would have resulted in even a sliver of hope for him. "I simply think that it would be best not to push-"

"I see."

He went quiet when she cut him off, watching her cautiously, and when she put the car in drive his eyes flicked down to her hand and then back to her face. "Perhaps you could simply pull into one of the parking spots and we could discuss it reasonably."

"Okay." She said, turning the wheel and pressing her foot to the gas.

He was relieved for half a second before their speed increased rather dramatically and she had the car aimed straight for the elm tree. "What are you doing?" He asked tightly.

"I think I told you already." She remarked, oddly calm as she set a collision course for the tree.

"Dearie." He said, thinking she was bluffing. "Don't be unreasonable." She said nothing, pushing the pedal down farther at the accusation that she was the one being unreasonable, and the car jolted forward, bouncing them both between the seat and the straps. He looked between her and the rapidly approaching tree as he slammed his palm against the dashboard. "Belle! Belle, stop!"

"Are you going to teach me this or not?" She asked, really trying to give him another chance.

"Stop the car!"

"I think I won't." She replied, knowing they were soon going to reach a point where she wouldn't have time to stop before they did hit the tree, but refusing to back down.

"Belle!"

"What, Rumple?" She asked.

"Stop the damn car!" He yelled.

"No." She said, still urging the car forward.

He cursed nastily and all at once magic exploded out of him and the engine died. The car jerked and began to slow down at once, his magic dragging it to a stop altogether, as if he had tied an invisible weight to the back. "Are you crazy?" He shouted as they rolled to a halt not three feet away from her intended target.

That question helped his cause not at all. She turned on him at once. "You know how I feel about you using magic!"

He had the nerve to splutter at her, as if she were at fault. "You were going to drive us straight into a bloody tree!"

"I warned you what I was going to do!" She threw back. "It's not my fault you didn't listen!"

"It's not _my_ fault you tried to _drive us into a tree?_" He asked incredulously.

She would not allow him to turn this on her. "Rumpelstiltskin, I am about to throttle you!"

"Still better than death via tree!" He retorted. "With the way you cause havoc we most likely would have blown up on top of it!"

"What is the matter with you?" She shouted. "Why don't you want me to learn this?"

"I never once said I didn't want you to learn!" He yelled back.

"You hardly have to! You have been doing everything short of erasing my memory to prevent me from accomplishing this! You have tricked me, stalled, added obstacles, pushed me until my temper snaps, and now are blaming me for your actions! I will not be baited or manipulated by you!" She was on a role now, all out ranting, her voice echoing in the small cab. "So what is it?" He said nothing and she narrowed her eyes. "Look, I'm going to learn this one way or another! There are plenty of people in this town who would teach me! You have three seconds to tell me before I storm out of this car! I am at my limit with you today!" He growled under his breath, clutching at his cane as he searched for an answer that was no doubt a lie, but might satisfy her. "Two seconds, and so help me if you lie to me I will throw a real fit and I promise you it won't be anything near so pleasant as this!"

"I don't want to make it any easier for you to leave!" He snapped.

"What?" She asked in exasperation. He let out a low breath, not looking at her. She really wanted to crawl over the seat and smack sense into him, and she wasn't really prone to violent behavior. "I'm not leaving! I told you I wasn't going to leave! I have told you that half a dozen times! Why don't you believe me?" Once again he said nothing. "Why?" She demanded.

"You don't have a reason to stay." He said, defeat evident in his voice.

"I love you!" She yelled.

"You love the man you think I can be." He said, calm now, and resigned.

"I love _you_, Rumpelstiltskin!" She shouted, because clearly he didn't listen when she said it calmly, or sweetly, or lovingly. "What do I have to do to prove it to you?" She really had no idea what to do right now. "What? What else do I have to do? What else do you need to know to convince you that I love you?"

"I do believe you-"

"You don't believe me!" She screamed. "Gods!" She ripped her seatbelt off and twisted, grabbing his shoulder hard and shaking him as she nearly fell over the center consul of the stupid machine. "How long, Rumple? Thirty years? Thirty two?" She snarled. "Do you want to know what happened in all those long years where we were apart? Do you want details? Is that what it's going to take to get it through that impossibly stubborn head of yours? Is that what you need to believe me?" He had that look again, the one that told her that the fear he had for himself had shifted to worry for her. "Because we can't keep doing this! You either need to trust me or send me away again!"

"Belle." He said, his voice breaking.

"I can't make you believe me!" She cried raggedly. "I can't do that for you no matter how much I might want to!" She shook him again. "I can't constantly be the one holding us up like this! I love you!" She repeated, her voice falling dramatically. "I love _you_. I love the man that you are right now the same way I loved the imp you were when I met you!" She felt tired all at once, and terribly drained. "You think because I say it that it's easy for me. It's not easy to let someone in. It's not easy for me either. It's not easy, and it scares me, and I'm afraid you'll leave me too."

Once again, she threw him. "What?" He asked sharply. "Why would you think that?"

She pressed her lips together before answering, knowing very well that this would hurt him and not wanting to do that no matter the fight they were having. "You never came for me."

She might as well have put his still beating heart on a hot poker. " I thought you were dead." He said brokenly. "I would have ripped apart the world to get you if I had thought for one moment you were alive."

"I know." She answered, and it scared her that she knew he would have gone to such an extreme in a lot of ways. "But Regina said you knew where I was and you didn't care, and I knew she was lying, but being alone that long…" She shook her head. "All you have to do is sit there with the thoughts and I didn't have a wheel or a cup. All I had were my memories and they start to fade around the edges." She slid back down into the seat and sighed, looking out the front window instead of at him, her temper now gone. "I don't know what else to say to you. I don't know what you need that I haven't given you, or at least tried to give you. I don't know if it's me you can't trust, or if it's because of your son, or some other part of your past you haven't told me about. I don't know what to do. What should I do, Rumple?"

There was a long pause and she waited for some sort of answer. Finally, she got one, although it wasn't what she expected. He took hold of her seatbelt and pulled it out of its holder, wrapping it back around her and clicking it into place so she was secure. Letting it go he lifted his hand up and turned the key in the ignition. The engine purred back to life and he sat back in his seat. He spoke quietly. "Put the car in reverse." She looked over at him and he continued, not quite meeting her eyes. "The hardest part will be learning to turn the wheel the opposite direction when you go backwards. Either that or parallel parking." When she just looked at him he went on. "I don't want you out on the road today, but we can get the basics down in the parking lot."

For a moment she was still before slowly reaching down and moving the stick to the R setting. She began to back up and he spoke in the same quiet, calm voice. "Check your mirrors before you move. You might hit something otherwise."

She did what he said, responding much better to this attitude than his original panic and snipping. For the next hour she practiced, with him instructing her in the same tone of voice. For most of that time he had her parking in empty spots until she was perfectly centered in each place. While it was a dull exercise compared to what she had been expecting, she did understand the need to do the thing properly and so made no protest as he had her repeat it nearly endlessly. Finally, the perfectionist in him was satisfied. "Well done, dearie." He said as she peered out her side window to see where the line was in relation to the car. She turned her attention back to him. "Would you like to try something else or take a break?"

She was pleased he was giving her options, rather than telling her one way or another. "A break please."

He made a hesitant suggestion. "Would you like to go get lunch?" Honestly, she wasn't sure she did. She was still frustrated with him, and confused over what exactly they were doing. She wasn't sure if they were fighting or making up, feeling as if they were in an odd place in between. When she hesitated he spoke again. "Please, Belle?"

She couldn't very well turn him down when he asked that way. "Okay."

"We'll need to drive." He said.

Saying nothing she got out of the car and changed places with him. He drove out of the parking lot and confused her when he didn't head to her apartment, Granny's, or his own home. Instead he headed the opposite direction and she looked out at the trees with interest. Truthfully, she had been eager to get back out into the woods, had often looked at the map that she had gotten from the records office longingly, but it seemed whenever she set her mind to it something would come up and prevent her from more than a short walk through the park.

"Where are we going?" She asked curiously.

"I thought you might like a picnic." He said, his eyes darting to her, waiting for her to either agree or have him take her back to town.

"In the forest?" She asked inanely.

"Yes."

"Oh." He was pleased when he saw her eyes light up eagerly in the reflection off the glass as she turned fully to look out the passenger side window. "I would like that a great deal. Are we going to go back to the well?" She didn't know any other place they might be going.

"No, a different place." He told her. "The well is to the east of here."

She stored that away and then fell quiet, nearly mesmerized by all trees, by the beauty of the place they were in. She had gotten so used to grey; the green was a wonderful change. They didn't drive very long, only fifteen minutes or so, before he turned off the main road and onto a dirt one. Having not seen a dirt road in this world she was intrigued by it. He slowed down as they went and another five minutes later he pulled into a smallish sort of clearing.

It was a very pretty spot, with the trees all around and a small stream running down one side, nearly hidden by all plants that were crowded along the bank. On the other edge, just in sight, was a small wooden house. It was well built, but looked a little neglected, with dusty windows and ivy growing untamed up one side and over the railings of a small porch. The shutters too spoke of age, the green paint faded and chipped, and one was hanging crookedly, as if hit by a strong wind sometime in the recent past.

She took all this in as he parked the car and opened his door. She got out behind him quickly, eager to explore this new place. "Where are we?" She asked with real interest. "Whose house is this?"

"Here they consider this a small summer home. A place to go on holiday, no one lives here for more than a week or so at a stretch."

She couldn't understand why. It was a perfectly charming little place. The only thing she could think that it needed was perhaps a fresh coat of paint and a good scrubbing, both of which could be accomplished in one or two very productive days. She rather thought she could live here very happily, as long as she could move some books in with her. "That seems a waste." She said as she walked over to it. "It's lovely." He said nothing to that, fiddling about with the car as she went up the porch. Going to one of the windows she looked in after wiping the grime off it as best she could, unable to temper down her inquisitive nature. Having a narrow space cleared she gazed inside, seeing a sparsely furnished space that looked as if someone had run through it knocking things all over. "Rumple, I think someone broke in. This place is in shambles."

"No one broke in, dearie." He replied calmly. "I simply haven't bothered to clean it up yet."

She turned her head. "It's yours?"

"So the deed says." He replied as he opened the trunk and began to make noise. It sounded as if he were moving things about in there. "I thought you might be more interested in the woods than an old cabin though."

She supposed she was, but she looked back inside all the same. "Do you own everything here?"

"Not everything." He said, but he way he said it told her he owned almost everything. She supposed she had already sussed that out though. She was anything but stupid and had heard people talking, or whispering under their breath as the case may be. No one wanted to anger Rumpelstiltskin. She couldn't blame them for it either, not with his reputation, not with the things she was sure he had done. They needed to work on that, she thought tiredly. He couldn't keep on like this much longer no matter what he thought.

Eventually it would catch up with him. Eventually it would catch up his son if he ever found him. She wondered if he ever considered that or if he was too obsessed with getting to Bae to be able too. He needed to start mending some bridges or he could well find himself fully isolated, unable to rely even on the good nature and intentions of those people that would help him even without a reason. Truth be told she was worried that something would happen to her and he would be alone again, fully and completely. The thought scared her, because she really wasn't sure how many more times he could come back from loss sane. Rumpelstiltskin, a man that had torn a world apart when he was in his right mind… well, the thought of him mad, of the destruction he was capable of with no checks or will to live, that, if nothing else, truly terrified her.

Slowly, she turned away from the cabin and went back over to him. When she came around the back of the car she saw him closing a wicker basket's lid before he closed up another odd looking white and blue box. He shoved that one to the back, out of the way, and glanced up when he saw her beside him. He grabbed for purchase in this awkward atmosphere they had somehow created together. "You always seemed to do better in sunlight." He glanced around the forest. "I thought this would be a good idea." He said it in a way that told her he now thought he had been wrong about it.

"It is a good idea." She told him, because it was. Unfortunately, they hadn't had the best morning. She supposed there was no point in dragging this out any longer. "Rumple, I'm worried about you."

"There's no need to worry about me, dearest."

"There is a wide and varied assortment of reasons to worry about you." She told him. "I believe quite rightly that I've decided to partake in all of them." He flinched ever so slightly, his hand resting on the basket. "Rumple?" She said softly.

"I'm sorry." An apology was not what she was expecting. "I have no right to question you and every reason to believe you. You've never once given me a cause not to." He sighed. "It's unfair of me to keep doing this to you."

Fair wasn't really the issue she was concerned with right now. "Why is this so hard for you?"

"There's been little trust in my life." He told her honestly. "I learned not to trust anyone before I could walk. Whenever I tried afterwards I was sorely disappointed."

"I need you to try again." She said with the firm understanding that this would be on par with getting him to give up magic. "You need to try with me." He nodded, but she pushed. "Rumple, I mean it. This won't ever work if you can't trust me, or believe me when I say something to you. You've spent your life covering yourself in secrets and schemes and now that's all you seem to be able to see. I can't spend my life like that. I can't spend my life with someone who can't trust me when I say something that matters so much. I can't spend it with someone who keeps shutting me out."

"I know you can't." He said.

She nodded, her face serious, and shifted a little closer into his space. "I would never hurt you." She told him, and she knew without a doubt it was true. What had she gone through to keep him safe? True, he had never told her much, but even under duress from the queen she hadn't spoken about what she had learned, having no idea what might be valuable to the woman. She had paid for that silence, in ways she wouldn't say, but she had held her tongue. For all his power she knew everyone had a weakness, and she was sure there had been one long before she showed up in his life. She refused to help destroy him. "And I never betrayed you."

"Maybe you should have."

"What?" She asked.

"Regina may have let you go."

"No, she wouldn't have." She was sure of that. "Nothing would have changed, except she would have hurt you in any way she could."

"I can handle Regina."

She wasn't so sure of that. "Would you have betrayed me?"

"It's not the same." He said.

"It's exactly the same." She insisted.

"You're worth something."

"You're worth something." She said firmly.

"No, I'm not."

"Yes, you are!" She snapped. "You're worth something to me! More than something!"

"Dearie-"

"Don't you dare say you're not!" She said, jabbing him in the chest. "Do you think I would have come back if you weren't?"

He actually took that in and turned it over in his head. "I don't-"

"The answer is no, Rumple." She sighed.

He shifted, clearly uncomfortable with this. "But-"

"Rumpelstiltskin, stop this." She ordered. "I will bully you into agreeing with me eventually, so you might as well save yourself the trouble."

"No one bullies me." He told her.

She sent him a look before reaching into the trunk and grabbing an old blanket out of it. "Please, I do it all the time." Stumped, he tried to work that out, seemingly only just realizing that was true, as she turned away. "Now, I'm hungry." She informed him. "So decide if you want to do this the easy way or the hard way and bring the basket."

As she headed toward the stream, which seemed to offer the better view, there was a pause before she heard him moving. When she was fifteen feet ahead of him the trunk shut and then he was following after her. She didn't walk far before picking a spot, was only just out of sight of the car and cabin, and flipped the blanket open, spreading it over a patch of grass under a large maple tree. By the time he caught up to her she had seated herself and was spreading her short skirt out around her, wondering how she had gotten used to so much of her legs showing. The first few times she had been beyond uncomfortable, even with memories promising her this was more than appropriate, and even more of them telling her that at some point in this fake life she had run about town in pants so short there was hardly anything to be left to the imagination. The very thought nearly had her fainting from embarrassment, because no proper woman would dream of showing her knees to the whole world, and pushed the idea from her mind. Even the short dresses and skirts she had were more acceptable to her than pants, although it seemed she was the only woman here who still thought that. She simply couldn't bring herself to wear them no matter what Ruby said.

Setting the basket beside her Rumpelstiltskin sat down, careful of his leg. She looked at it again, wondering what had happened. He had never had a limp before. He caught her watching him, no doubt knowing exactly what she was curious about, but didn't answer the unspoken question. He simply set his cane down along the edge of the fabric and opened the basket as he settled his back against the tree trunk. She watched him as he pulled things out and smiled when she saw another box of chocolates. This package looked different from the first one, but she knew it was the candy all the same. A moment later and he pulled out a clearly chilled bottle of wine and two surprisingly tall glasses for it.

"Wine?" She asked with interest. She hadn't had wine since before she went with him so long ago now. She hadn't had any liquor at all, with the exception of one glass of hard cider that she had to celebrate with the dwarves when they found all the diamonds in the mines. Having spent so long without having any it had gone straight to her head.

"Champagne." He corrected.

"What's champagne?" She asked curiously.

"A special sort of wine." He told her.

"Why is it special?" She asked as she plucked a blueberry out some Tupperware and began to snack on the fruit. She quite liked these dishes that sealed the food in. It was a lovely invention, keeping food fresh so very long.

For the first time all day a small smile pulled at the corners of his mouth. "I would hate to ruin the surprise."

She tilted her head and he broke the pretty foil around the top and tossed the trash in the now empty basket. She wondered how he had fit so much in it, or why he had. There was enough food here to feed them three times over even if they overindulged themselves. She did like what he chosen though. It was all light finger foods; as if he had brought every sort of hors d'oeuvre he could think of. Truly, it was perfect for a picnic and she was eager to try some of the things she didn't recognize, as well as eat some of the things she hadn't had in decades. Without a word he set the bottle down and carefully pulled at the cork, twisting it as his hand tightened on the neck of the bottle hard, as if it might try to jump away from him. She watched on and when the cork came out with an audible pop she jumped and let out a squeak of surprise.

He chuckled at her, amused, and picked up one of the glasses. He poured in the light golden liquid and handed it to her when it was filled. She took the glass and held it up, fascinated by the bubbles fluttering up from the bottom. "How pretty." She said happily. He continued to smile as he filled his own glass and then waved her on.

"Best see if you like it."

She sipped at it at once and found she liked the taste, and the feel of the bubbles on her tongue even more. Swallowing, she felt them tickle up her nose and couldn't help but laugh. "It tickles!" She said in delight.

"I suppose it does." He agreed, taking a sip of his own drink before setting it to the side and opening a container of strawberries. "Try it with these. It brings the flavor out."

She took a berry out of the squared bowl and bit into it, licking her lips as she did. She caught his eyes fixated on her and blushed lightly as she chewed and swallowed, taking another sip of the bubbling wine. It certainly did change the flavor, adding new layers to it, or bring out ones she couldn't detect before. "I think you've introduced me to a very dangerous drink." She told him.

He chuckled again. "Indeed I have."

She smiled and he relaxed fully, busying himself with opening all the containers. Most of them had more than one sort of food in them, and he had pilled them on top of one another as well as beside each other. It seemed he was a packrat in every aspect of his life. It was endearing really. "Did you bring the entire market with you?" She asked, laughter thick in her voice.

"I didn't know what you might want." He told her reasonably.

He must have spent hours getting all this together, because she was sure he must have made most of this himself. The thought warmed her and she scooted closer to him. He glanced over just as she settled beside him and she leaned in and kissed him before he could say anything. He kissed her back at once, no doubt having resigned himself to a lack of affection after the driving lesson incident. One of his hands fluttered over her side and she pulled away gently. His hand fell at once and she reached up to caress his cheek. "This is very sweet, Rumple, but you didn't have to do all this for me."

"I wanted to." He said, and she saw the sincerity in his eyes.

Touched by that she kissed him again. This time when she broke away she shifted again so she was sitting with her back to his chest. Clearly shocked his hand settled on her hip lightly and she leaned back into him, using him as a backrest. It was obvious he wasn't used to being so close with someone, and really she wasn't either, but she did enjoy the contact. Reaching out she picked up and puffy, bite sized pastry, twisted, and held it up to his mouth. Shock was rapidly replaced with darkening, lust filled eyes. Slowly, he opened his mouth and she fed him, thinking this was wonderfully intimate.

As he chewed his arm slid all the way around her waist and he watched her silently. She wondered what he was thinking, going shy, but refusing to back down. Stretching out his other arm he plucked a thin cracker with a small slice of salmon and cream cheese up and offered it to her. She opened her mouth at once and he set it on her tongue, his thumb brushing her lower lip as he pulled it away.

The exchange continued, slowly morphing into a sweetly playful exercise, to something new and fun. He began to intersperse bites of food with light kissed on her jaw and neck, tickling and teasing her with mischievous nips at her skin, as if he were tasting her as much as the food. She began to giggle as they turned it into a flirtatious game and he smiled at her. She became full far too soon for her taste, and he knew it. As he presented a last piece of chocolate to her she took it, purposefully kissing at his fingers as she got it, wondering where this boldness was coming from.

No sooner did she swallow than he swept her to her back over the blanket. He followed after her with surprising catlike grace, kissing her deeply as he settled half over her, his arms propped on either side of her body. She shifted closer to him as she wrapped her arms around him. One of his hands tangled in her hair and she moaned softly into his mouth as heat suffused her body. Instead of backing away when he heard her, which was normally what he did, he kissed her more deeply.

They tangled up together almost at once. Much to her surprise it felt normal instead of making her nervous, and Rumpelstiltskin was somehow lighting her on fire and soothing her to calm all at once. Little sparks were erupting all over her body and she shivered, reveling in the feelings. Twisting his head he began to trail his lips along her jaw and she turned her head to make it easier, having no idea what he was doing, but knowing it felt wonderful. Shifting slightly he kissed the place behind her ear and she let out a sharp breath as a jolt ran all the way down her body. When he heard that he kissed her there again and she felt the tip of his tongue dart out to taste her for a half a moment. Her hands tangled into his jacket hard as her whole body quivered and her eyes pressed tightly closed.

Nuzzling at her jaw with his nose he reluctantly raised his head and meet her eyes when they fluttered open, no doubt hazy with lust. Lifting his hand he brushed her curls back and smiled at her softly, his eyes warm and inviting. She blushed as she smiled back, hooking her finger under the knot on his tie and tugging it playfully. "You're the only person I've ever met that would get this dressed up to go on a picnic."

He laughed softly, the sound rolling over her pleasantly. "I only want to look my best for you."

She pulled him down with his tie and kissed him again. "That's very considerate of you." She mumbled against his lips. "But I think if I had to pick I would prefer the dragon hide vests and leather pants."

He laughed into her mouth as he kissed her. "Hardly respectable for a businessman."

She found this conversation entertaining as she tangled her hands in his hair and held him against her. He hummed in satisfaction and kissed her back eagerly. When she finally let him go, mostly so she could breathe, she panted. "You're rich, can't you be eccentric?"

He kissed her again before shifting so he could lie down beside her. She turned toward him at once and he smiled, caressing her with real contentment. "Perhaps not the wisest course of action at the moment, but I won't deny I miss the dragon hide."

She giggled, liking this. "I'm glad I'm not the only one."

He tickled her cheek and sat up, taking her with him despite her slight pout. "The champagne will get warm." He handed her the glass back. "And we've a whole bottle to finish before that happens."

"Well, I suppose we better get back to that then." She teased, kissing his cheek. "But I'm blaming you when I start to get silly. I never drink and these bubbles are clearly suspect."

"Something I will willing take blame for." He promised as she settled back against him. He leaned back into the tree trunk so it was easy to support both of them and sipped at his own glass after kissing the side of her head, his lips tickling her hair. Sure enough by the end of the bottle, and somehow he scammed her into drinking much more than he did, she was giggling at nothing in particular and he was tickled pink by her behavior, claiming to have not seen anything this funny in at least a hundred years. She lay back down on the blanket and he watched her with real contentment as she laughed and gazed up at the trees. At one point she picked a thick blade of grass and turned it into a whistle. He surprised her when he made one too, playing his twice as well, telling her he used to do this all the time in his youth and with his son, who had laughed and laughed at it.

When the sun began to head toward the horizon and the afternoon got late he packed the basket back up, with her hindering more than helping the whole process. He took her back to the car and drove her home, walking her up the stairs to be sure she didn't fall in her state and kill herself. When they were inside her apartment he made her promise to drink three glasses of water, which she didn't understand and lost track of the conversation when he told her why. Shaking his head at her inattention he kissed her forehead and wished her goodnight, reminding her to call him if she needed anything before he left. Full and happy she drank the water before curling up on the couch with her pillow. It was the first time since she left his house that she didn't have a nightmare, the memories of picnics and sunshine driving the shadows away.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Dinner was not going the way it normally did, at least not the way it did for her. Rumpelstiltskin had barely set foot in her apartment before her mind went all kinds of jumbled. She hadn't seen him in a week, which in itself was odd for them now as they spent at least two or three evenings together, not to mention most of the day on Sunday. He had called her twice now about meeting, and both times she had begged him off, insisting that she was ill, and in a way she was. She supposed his impromptu stop by the library the second time she gave him the same excuse must have been convincing enough to not have him thinking she was somehow bolting on him, or having second thoughts about this. She was sure she looked about as good as she felt, although she hardly had a cold.

She was upset, badly, and was paying for the visit she had finally paid to her father in a way she hadn't been expecting. What she had hoped would be a sort of tentative reconciliation had turned quickly into something close to a nightmare, and more disturbingly reinforced everything the dark queen had told her about her value while she was imprisoned. What she had once assumed was nothing more than cruelty meant to try to break her, was in fact a disturbing reality where her father was concerned. As she filled the sink with warm soapy water to clean up the mess they'd made cooking and eating she tried to push the whole incident away, but it came to the forefront of her mind despite her efforts, and it hardly seemed to matter that Rumpelstiltskin was less than a foot to her left. Generally just his presence was enough to chase dark thoughts away, but not today. Turning off the hot water when the sink was full she shuddered and turned to clear the table, hoping he didn't see her haunted expression as she allowed the memory to run her over in the hopes it would cycle off when it was done.

Taking a deep breath she stepped into the flower shop, looking around with interest. Why her father had become the owner this type of business in this world was beyond her. He had never been overly fond of flowers. He was a knight, and if hard pressed could do any number of other things to help his village. He had done everything in times of crisis from fighting to farming, with some fishing thrown in for good measure. Her father was nothing if not hands on, and after her mother had passed had seemed incapable of sitting still. Looking back she wondered if the small castle they had was too filled with her mother's ghost for him at the start.

His absence that first year throughout the day had been hard, even with her nanny, but had been a sort of proving ground she hadn't known she could handle. By the time she turned nine she had learned more about the real work of a lady than women three times her age. Many things had fallen to her, although she knew she had been far too young to get them, but even then she had been clever enough to cope, to learn what she needed, and to excel in a way that had shocked everyone. By the time she was fourteen she had taken full control of the management of their estate and village, leaving her father to other pursuits, which came quickly in the form of swarming ogres.

Reaching over she let her fingers brush over the petals of a rose sitting in a clear vase near the door. As she adjusted to the array of scents she heard him in the back. "Just a moment!" She heard a thud and winced, hoping he hadn't broken anything of value and wondering how he had survived so many battles when he was as coordinated as she was. She knew very well that she was nearly identical to her mother in looks, but she had inherited his natural grace without a doubt. It was a wonder any of the vases were in one piece really. A moment later he bustled out holding a large bunch of dripping tulips. "How can I help-." He stopped speaking abruptly at the sight of her, the first one he'd had in over four months now. "Belle?"

"Hello, Papa." She said quietly. She had waited too long to come here, she knew she had, but she had needed to piece at least part of herself together before this happened. It had taken her nearly a full month to even consider forgiving him for what had happened, and another after that to work up the courage she needed to speak to him alone, which she knew was what she should do. Her father was a private man and wouldn't like an audience no matter what the outcome of this was. The following two months, well, perhaps she wasn't as brave as Rumpelstiltskin accused her of being because she always managed to find some excuse not to come here.

He seemed at a loss as he stood there with the flowers dripping water onto his shoes. He knew better than anyone how stubborn she was. She had no doubt he was shocked she had come to see him after she so flatly told him she never wanted to see him again. "How- how are you?" He asked at last, the awkwardness palpable.

"I'm fine." She answered quietly, hovering near the door in case he was going to try something, like grabbing her and dragging her kicking and screaming over the line. "I'm working at the library now."

"Yes, I know. I heard." He said, finally setting the flowers down on the counter, breaking the head off at least two of them in his haste.

She wished they could go back to when they spoke so freely, to the time when she could share anything and everything with him. Everything felt wrong and out of sync. The years they had spent apart had done more than change her, they had changed him too, and the relationship they once had. Deciding it might be best to go straight at the heart of the matter since he was a straightforward man if ever there was one, she jumped into it. "He let me go." Her father said nothing. "After a year he told me to go home." Or he might as well have when he sent her off to get straw. That was what he had been saying under the teasing and false promise of the story of his son. Rumpelstiltskin had been sending her back to her family, back to what she loved, back to a place he thought she would be safe and content. "He broke our deal so I could come home. I know you hate him for what he did, but he was always good to me. He was polite, and kind in his own way. He made sure I was comfortable and I always had plenty of food." She smiled a little, sad recollections of the past, bittersweet memories invading her mind. "He spoiled me really, even worse than you did."

There was a brief pause. "How can you love him?" He asked bluntly. "He's a beast."

"He's a man." She said softly. "And he has hurt. He isn't a beast."

"He's ruined your life."

"Stop saying that." She ordered. "He saved all our lives."

"In return for what, Belle?" He asked angrily.

"All magic comes with a price." She said softly, repeating Rumpelstiltskin's favored warning. "The price to stop the war was me." This price, in the end, was heavier than he could know, but that didn't change that it had been the right thing. It also didn't mean she was going to burden him with what had happened to her when she left Rumpelstiltskin's estate. "My life, my freedom, it was a small price compared to what we got."

"It wasn't for me." He stated, his voice going gruff. "You're all I have."

She nodded a little. "Then maybe the price was both of ours." She felt tired, terribly so. "I'm sorry for the pain it caused you. Truly, I am, but what choice was there?"

"We could have fought."

"We would have lost." She told him honestly. "And we would both be dead along with our village. I couldn't let that happen and you know it. I couldn't let you die when I could stop it. I think Rumpelstiltskin knew it too. He could see how much I loved you."

"He tricked you."

"Yes." She agreed. "But it was a fair bargain all the same. Maybe one even better for our side if you look at it logically."

"Belle." He sighed. "You never valued yourself enough."

"There was never a reason when you valued me more than any father should." She told him. "I don't want to fight, Papa. I don't want us at odds. I don't want to worry that you of all people are going to betray me. I want us to be a family again." He looked down in shame at her words. "But I won't change myself for you. I won't allow you to decide my fate for me."

"You expect me to stand idly by while you as good as court disaster?"

"I expect you to let me make my own choices." She answered. "I'm a grown woman, and have as good as been since I was fourteen." She felt as if she were a pet parrot, constantly repeating the same phrase over and over for other's entertainment. "It's my life to live, papa."

"I can't do this, Belle." He said as if he had all the pain in the world resting solely on his shoulders. "I can't watch you walk to your own doom this way. I can't let that man ruin your goodness any more."

"Why do you think I'm ruined?" She asked, torn to the quick as he said it again. As if the time apart had made her into something wrong, or broken, or disgusting. She didn't understand. "You think that loving someone has ruined me?"

"He isn't _someone_. He's Rumpelstiltskin. He's evil. You don't need to take my word on, you can ask anyone here and they'll tell you the same. The gods only know what other deals he's made." He gathered himself. "Just let him go, my rose. Let him go and we can forget it all. No one here knows what happened. No one needs to know what he did to you, what he made you do."

"What he made me do?" She asked, unsure of what he was talking about.

"I'm not asking." He said at once, not meeting her eyes. "We don't have to discuss it unless you want to." He looked terribly uncomfortable and all at once she was sure of what he was saying.

She was more angry than embarrassed. Angry he thought that Rumple would abuse her or hurt her after all the trouble he went to in order to find her when her father kidnapped her. She thought if nothing else it would prove to him that he did care for her, that she was not another possession or deal to the other man. That she mattered more to him than a woman he had simply bedded as a matter of convenience. "All he made me do was clean his estate! I was his caretaker!" She snapped. "He never touched me!"

"As you say." He said in a way that conveyed utter disbelief.

"I do say!" His attitude was not placating her. Rumpelstiltskin, while a fickle master at first, had never hurt her. He had never raised a hand, his voice, or even hinted that he would abuse her in such a way. The worst thing he had ever done to her was ignore her when she annoyed him, and even that had only happened for the first month or so. Disregarding their final fight of course, which she often tried to disregard. That had just been a disaster. "He would never cross a line like that! He would never force me to do something I didn't want! He would never hurt me!"

"He already has!" He yelled back. "Look at you! You aren't the same girl I lost!"

"I'm not a girl!" She shouted back. "I haven't been a girl in a long time! We can't go back to that! We can't go back to when you protected me from everything! That's not the world we live in! It's not in me to let you take care of me that way! I don't need taken care of! I need you to listen to me! I need you to be my family!"

"Why can't you just let it go?" He all but begged. "You could have a good life with a good man. You could be happy. A good man would make you happy."

She was at a loss. "Papa, why does it matter who I decide to be with? Why does that change who we are to each other?"

"How could it not?" He asked. "He'll twist you until there's nothing left of the woman you should be."

"I am the woman I should be." She said half in anger and half in hurt. "Has it occurred to you that I might be the one changing him?" She asked.

"No." He said bluntly. "Because no one can change a monster into a man. You're trying to fight a battle you can't win. You can't change someone like that." He was so sure he was right, so sure she would fail and she didn't know why. Never once had she failed anything she set her mind to. Never failed at anything that had been placed in front of her.

"Evil is made." She said. "There's no reason it can't be unmade. I'm helping him."

"Which means you're speaking to him again?" He asked, anger clouding his voice.

She certainly wasn't going to lie about it. "I am."

"Belle." He pressed his lips together. "I can't do this. I can't watch you do this to yourself. Either leave him or…or…" He floundered badly.

"Or what?" She asked.

"Or I can't have anything to do with you." That struck her like a blow. She watched him in mute agony and he looked away from her. "I'm sorry, rose, but I can't watch you do this. You have no idea how much it hurts me."

"I have no idea how much it hurts you?" She asked emotionlessly. "I gave up everything for you time and again, and because I won't do what you say you'll make me choose between you and the man that I love?"

"Stop saying that!" He snapped.

"That I love him?" She asked, feeling as if he had shattered the delicate glass her heart was now made of. "Not saying it won't change anything. I do love him." She began to back toward the door. "Making me pick between you is the beastly thing."

"You think he didn't try to keep you from me?" He demanded.

"I was coming home to you." She said, too broken now to raise her voice. "When I finally remembered who I was I started looking for you again. He helped me make a poster."

"He threw it away!" He snarled. "He knew where I was! He owns this building! He's the damn landlord!" Before she could say anything he kept on, refusing to hear her side. "He nearly killed me during the damn curse!"

"What?" She asked, thrown.

"Didn't tell you that either did he?" He asked. "No, he wouldn't. He wouldn't tell you anything that might keep you away from him. He kidnapped me and beat me with that damn cane of his. If the sheriff hadn't shown up I'd be dead now. All over some stupid, damn, chipped trinket!"

"You stole the cup?" She asked in a cross between horror and understanding.

He was only angrier when she seemed to know what it was too. "What is it? Some sort of bloody magic trinket?" He snarled. "Is that what he almost killed me over?"

"It's not magic." She said. "It was mine. It was all he had after I left."

"What-"

She cut him off, unable to stay here any longer. "I won't choose between you." She said softly. "But I won't try to change your mind either." He looked as if she were stomping on his heart, as if this were all her fault, as if she had been in control of any of this. "Goodbye, Papa. You know where I am if you want to talk."

He said nothing as she turned and left, pulling the door to the shop closed quietly behind her. She felt as if a chapter of her life was closing with it, and found it hurt too much even to cry. It was like she had lost her mother all over again, although the circumstances were drastically different. She had somehow made it through the afternoon at the library and then retreated to her apartment where she had done her best to distract herself, although it was a pointless exercise. She had contemplated talking to Ruby, but in order for the waitress to fully understand she would have to tell her about her past, and she really wasn't ready for that. She had almost gone to Rumple as well, but was afraid of either him loosing his temper and doing something rash, or of him questioning her in ways she wasn't ready to be questioned. If she were honest she couldn't handle thinking anymore, so instead she had ended up doing the one thing she knew would distract her from thoughts of her father.

Bracing herself she had stepped into her bedroom, a place she had refused to get near even after the door was removed, and promptly sat down on the floor just inside the entryway. Her anxiety had crested at once but she had gritted her teeth and flatly refused to give into it. She wasn't sure how long she sat there before the fear began to come down a little at a time, but she did manage it at last, although she wondered if anyone would ever understand what a monumental effort it had taken. Most likely no one ever would, but she had been able to reason that if she could do this, if she could sit by herself in a small room voluntarily, then perhaps she could also deal with what her father had said, with what he had decided to do. At least half settled by that she had tried to sleep, but only managed to doze fitfully.

Her sleeping had gotten no better as time progressed. If she were to guess she hadn't had more than four or five hours since the fight, which was now nearly eight days prior. She was sure that was why Rumple thought she had been sick, and most likely still did. Her skin was about the same color as oatmeal and she knew she had dark circles under her eyes. She also suspected she was loosing weight again since she hadn't been eating, having no appetite to speak of, and her clothes were getting baggy once more.

As she turned to stack the dishes he reached over and tucked her loose hair behind her ear. "Are you still sick, dearie?"

"I'm okay." She told him, feeling bad about her state. "Only tired now. I'm sorry I'm not being very good company."

"Don't be silly." He told her. "Everyone gets sick."

She half smiled. "Even the invincible Rumpelstiltskin?"

He huffed. "I'm only nearly invincible." He informed her. "And sadly I do get sick here. I forgot how bothersome that was."

"I bet you're a grouch when you're sick." She said, imagining it. "I refuse to deal with you in that state."

"A very loving sentiment, dearest." He said with laughter in his voice.

"Even I'm not that self sacrificing." He barked out a laugh as he put the leftovers away in her fridge for her to eat later. He had been doing that a lot, making enough for her to eat for a couple of days after he left. Apparently he wanted to be sure she didn't go hungry, and now that she could work the microwave it was really convenient. She didn't have to go to the inn so much now, and while that meant less time with Ruby it was allowing her to save some money for things other than food and utilities.

Deciding the dishes weren't worth doing until they soaked she put as many as she could in the hot water and dried her hands as she spoke. "I see. It's good to know what your limits are." She smiled a little in response and he seemed to deem that her fridge was at least marginally well stocked. She wouldn't be at all surprised if more food appeared in it overnight as he put things in with his magic. He tended to do that, which was sweet, if disconcerting when she opened her pantry to find things she knew hadn't been there only a few hours before. She had gotten paranoid over it for a few days until she was sitting at her table looking at a book and a box of cereal materialized on the counter in a puff of magic, letting her know she was not forgetting things or imagining them, which was deeply disturbing to her. She had jumped a good two feet in the air at the sight and sound of it before settling down and rolling her eyes. Her mentioning it hadn't stopped him from doing it and she figured it was an eccentric behavior she would simply leave alone. If he had as little food as he hinted at growing up it was no wonder he wanted her well fed. She had no doubt it was a sign of affection for him and didn't blame him for it. "I would have come over you know."

"I know." She told him, appreciating that he was willing to deal with her if she were actually sick. "I didn't want to pass it on though." And that was a flat out lie that she immediately felt bad about. She pushed that away in the place where she put other things she regretted and tried to think no more of it.

He shook his head as he shut the icebox. "Whatever you say. You need to go shopping. You're almost out of food."

"I have enough food for at least a week." She told him as they went into her living room, because she really did. "I'm a woman, not a dragon. I don't eat quite as much as you seem to think."

"By the look of you it seems as if you think you may be one of your doves." He surprised her by tugging at the side of her dress as he referred to her outside neighbors, who had come to inspect him more than once as he visited. He had brought her a small bird feeder for them from his shop when she excitedly showed him the fluffy chicks. He frowned when he saw how loose the dress was. "Are you dropping weight?"

"I haven't been hungry." She shrugged.

He shook his head. "I suppose you did eat at super." He was a little mollified by that and changed the subject as she flipped the overhead light on. "Maybe I should cook for you tomorrow too."

"Okay." She agreed and he tilted his head, happily surprised. She never invited him over two days in a row. He had never said anything about it, but he had noticed she always kept them apart at least one full day before seeing him again. That had been so she was sure they didn't fall back into bad habits, but now she wasn't so sure she wanted to be by herself as much as she was. It also seemed as if he might well be the only family she had now. "Maybe we could go to Granny's again instead of cooking." She suggested.

His eyes glittered knowingly. "Ready to see if I behave in public when there's more than one person in the restaurant?"

"I don't know what you mean." She said innocently.

"You know exactly what I mean." He said as he watched her. "That was very well played. I give you full credit for it."

She blew out a little breath. "Stop being so clever." She ordered.

He smiled. "I can't help myself."

"You don't even try." She said, a surge of playfulness wiggling out from some corner of her that wasn't so very tired. "You enjoy proving it."

"Perhaps I do." He agreed as he tugged her to him. "But you like watching me prove it. A stupid man would never please you."

"You're on the other end of the spectrum from dull." She told him. "You've found another extreme entirely."

He liked that, she could tell, she could tell how pleased he was that she admired something about him that he admired about himself. She knew he didn't find himself handsome or physically strong, nor did he delude himself into thinking he was the kindest or gentlest of men. He did know he was smart, no matter how he might use his intellect he was intelligent. Leaning down he kissed her warmly and she returned the affection happily. Her stomach, which had been in knots for days, finally began to settle a little.

He broke away after a few moments and sat on the couch, tugging her after him. She smiled as he slid her to him and after a moment he gathered his courage and took hold of her legs and pulled them up and over his. She cocked her head but didn't protest as she ended up sitting sideways and facing him. He relaxed when she simply shifted a little to get comfortable and he set his hand on her leg right below her knee. His thumb began to run little circles over her skin and she liked that. In return she reached up to tug at the ends of his hair gently.

He watched her as she played with his hair. She wondered if he could tell she had something to say, most likely he did. She never had been very good at hiding her thoughts, mostly because she had so many she didn't know where to start trying to begin with. Perhaps she should ask him since he did it so very well. "What are you going to do after you find Bae?" She asked at last as the silence dragged on.

His hand twitched slightly. "Hope he'll speak to me."

She sent him a look. "You're his father, of course he will. He loves you." He didn't seem so sure about that, but she had another topic to discuss. Not sleeping all night certainly gave her plenty of time to think, and she had been thinking, a lot. For the first time since she was nineteen she felt as if she actually had a future worth having. She thought she finally had a place where she could do what she had always dreamed of doing. It was simply an irony that the curse had brought them to a place where finding your dreams wasn't supposed to happen. "I meant after that."

"I can't say." He said honestly. "I haven't thought about it. Why?"

She was quiet for a moment before answering. She wasn't entirely sure how he was going to take this. She wasn't entirely sure if she was ready to know, but she had made up her mind. He deserved to know what she had chosen for herself now that she had the good fortune to be able to choose. "I'm going to stay here, Rumple."

He nodded. "I'll come back here then, after I find him."

"No, that's not what I mean." She said. "Not here in Storybrooke, but here in this world." He frowned deeply, but she wasn't put off. "I know everyone else wants to go back to our world, but I'm not going to."

He had gone sharp and alert in an instant. "What are you saying?"

"I'm saying I'm staying here." She repeated. "I don't want to go back there."

"Why would you want to stay here?" He asked as if she had just told him she quite enjoyed being mauled by bears.

She shrugged one shoulder. "This world is different than ours. There are schools here that I could go to. Universities where they would let me learn the way I always wanted to. Being an educated woman here is respectable. It's encouraged." She wasn't sure he could understand this being a man from their world, but she thought he might have some insight knowing what she did about his early life. He could understand a lack of options. "I could be more than someone's daughter, or a pretty wife married off just to have babies. That was never the life I wanted." She met his eyes. "I could be someone in this world. I could change things and take care of myself. I could travel whenever I wanted to. There are opportunities here I would never get if I went back." She took a breath in slowly. "So I'm going to stay."

"I… see." He clearly had no idea what to say to this and she could understand that. He would need time to absorb this, and she would let him have it.

"I want you to stay with me." She continued, and he watched her with a closed expression. "I'm not asking for a decision." She wanted to be clear about that. "But you gave me time to think about going with you to find your son, and I would like to do that." His expression sparked at that, but quickly reverted back to expressionless mask. "I know a lot depends on Bae, and I understand that, but I want you to stay here in this world with me." She hesitantly stroked his cheek, knowing this was upsetting him in some way, although exactly how she wasn't sure. "You won't have the power you did before, and maybe not as much magic, but you'll still be a wealthy man. We can find a new place to live and you can do whatever you want." She really hoped he would think about this. "You do better here, Rumple."

His eyes flickered. "You're doing this for me." He stated unhappily.

"No, I'm doing this for me." She told him truthfully. "I'm going to stay here regardless of what you choose to do, but that doesn't change that you do better here. I can see the difference even if you can't. I know this is a lot to ask, I know how much security it gave you being what you were before, but you were never happy. We've been happy here since the curse broke, at least I have." She saw him struggling to say something but she didn't want him to do that now. "Promise you'll consider it. That's all I'm asking from you right now."

He was quiet for so long she thought he was going to deny her that, but at last he answered. "I promise." He said quietly. "Belle, do you understand what it will mean for you if you stay here?"

"Yes." She answered, because the full magnitude of that sort of change had settled deeply in her heart. "I do. I know I don't know very much about this place, but I'm learning, and I'll keep learning." That was the least of her fears. "We don't have to talk about this anymore today." She told him.

Letting go of her leg and slid his arm around her back and surprised her by lifting her up onto his lap. Her arms went around his shoulders as he settled her and he simply looked at her for a moment. "Are you ever going to stop surprising me?" He asked. "I've never met anyone that could do that more than once."

She smiled at him softly. "I hope not. You get the funniest expression on your face when I confuse you." He sent her a look and she shifted, tucking her head onto his shoulder. "Although I don't know why. I'm not a very mysterious creature."

"You are, without a doubt, the oddest woman I have ever met." He informed her.

"I'm taking that as a compliment." She informed him.

"You should." He told her. His arms settled more firmly around her waist and she nuzzled her face against his neck. He let out a sigh and stroked her side absently as he relaxed fully back into the cushions. After a moment he surprised her by returning to the topic of her staying here, which she had been sure he wasn't going to do. "What is it you want to study?"

"Creative writing." She told him, having spent a great deal of time thinking of that. Ruby had taught her to find things out on the computer as well. It was astonishing that she could access almost anything through a net. Or perhaps the net caught the information for her and hauled it back, she was a little unclear on that, but had been so smitten with what it could do she hadn't asked about it. "Can you believe they teach that?"

He patted her side. "I have no doubt you'll be publish inside a year."

A surge of warm affection tore through her and she kissed his neck right above his collar. At least he believed in her even if he had never anticipated her deciding to stay in this world. He was even aware of how little she knew and thought she would succeed here. He let out a quiet breath as her lips touched his skin. Tired of talking she moved her hand from his shoulder and tugged at his tie without lifting her head off his shoulder. His arms tightened further and one of his hands flattened out over her ribcage. Unable to undo the knot with one hand she sat up, kissing his jaw as she went, and used both hands to get it loose.

Tugging the patterned silk had it slipping out from under the linen of his collar and he was watching her with cautious anticipation. Leaning in she kissed him warmly as her fingers began to undo buttons. He let out a shuddering groan as her knuckles brushed over the small triangle of skin she exposed. Pulling her head back a little she kissed his cheek and then began to work her way down his jaw, pressing one feather light kiss to his skin after another.

She shifted in his lap so she could kiss at the skin she exposed more easily and he let out a breath as his hands tightened further. Not a moment later she felt him get hard below her and blushed as her head dipped down below his chin, which he had tilted far back to give her room. Ignorant by practice as opposed to information she said nothing about it. She had never liked not knowing about things and had learned how this worked long ago, only a few weeks after her cycle started when she was thirteen. Ruby had not been shy about sharing her own experience on the subject either, which had embarrassed her deeply, and then there was plenty of literature on the subject as well. She was sure if anyone from her old life knew that they would faint dead away, but she had never found less knowledge to be better than more.

Rumpelstiltskin shifted below her, rubbing against her for several moments before getting a better hold on her and twisting them about. Before she knew what was happening she was stretched out on the couch below him and he had captured her lips with his. He settled so he was laying half on top of her and she was happy to let his weight settle over her. Lifting her hands she tangled one in his hair to hold him against her and set the other on his shoulder. One of his hands began to trace over her body lightly, exploring carefully, and she felt the apprehension in the way he was holding himself, in the way he was touching her. She kissed him more deeply and he gained confidence that he was welcome to touch her back.

She knew the moment he acknowledged it by the way the contact changed and sighed into his mouth as he increased the pressure of his touch. His thumb brushed the side of her chest and she let out a little moan, pressing into his hand. He became bold then and she couldn't help but approve as he cupped her breast and sent thrills down her body. Heat pooled in her belly and she let out a little whimper as her hands slid under his jacket and began to map him out with her fingers, touching him much more shyly than he was touching her. Shifting a little toward the back of the couch he settled his side on the cushions to make it easier to hold her and the arm he had been using to prop himself up slid under her shoulder. A moment later his hand was cupping the back of her head and his fingers were tangled in her hair.

He pressed his mouth a little harder over hers as his other hand slid down over her belly and settled on her hip. Gripping her, he used the hold to turn her toward him, and when she was half on her side facing him he rubbed himself against her leg. Turning his head he nudged her face to the side with his nose and began to nibble at the base of her jaw. She began to squirm as hot, unfamiliar sensations suffused her and his hand slid to the inside of her thigh, slipping up under her skirt. She bit her lip as she quivered all over and he pressed his lips right behind the shell of her ear, the same place that he had found when they were at the picnic. She wondered briefly how she could have never noticed that spot on her body before, let alone known that it could feel so good to have him kiss her there, when the thought was thrown to the background. His fingers brushed over the juncture between her thighs and she let out a sharp gasp as her whole body jerked at the sensation.

He hummed into her skin, pressing her back down and returning his hand to her center, tickling the spot gently over the terribly thin material of her under things. Heat surged through her as her hips jerked against his hand. She knew well enough that she could feel good if she touched herself there, but it had been so long since she had any interest in that, since she had been at his castle at least. In the queen's tower she had been terrified all the time and thoughts of escape and worry predominating her waking hours. After that, well, she suspected the drugs had dulled more than her mind. Even so, even knowing that, no one else had ever touched her there, and he was certainly better at this than she had ever been when trying to accomplish the same goal. Of course, she had always been a little ashamed of herself for this, but Rumpelstiltskin had no such qualms.

She gripped at his shirt as her head turned back toward his and he captured her lips at once. A low whine escaped her and her breathing got quicker as he stroked her patiently, pushing her toward a place she hadn't been before. Her whole body began to quake as he touched her and he became more focused as her reactions increased. He ran his finger in a tight circle over her and she broke away with a gasp as her head began to spin and an odd, sharp fog began to settle over her. As the pleasure began to build to an unmanageable level she squirmed desperately, unable to stand it. Her hand shot down to try to still his but he wouldn't be swayed. "Rumple." She whined. He kissed her again, deeply, and rubbed her more quickly. A wave of white-hot pleasure crashed through her and she let out a shout as her body went stiff all over, breaking away from his mouth.

Panting quietly she turned her head and buried her face against his shoulder as her body went wild. Her fingers tangled into his now loosened shirt and he slipped his hand out from under the skirt of her dress and smoothed it back down her legs, covering her back up while she lay pressed against him, utterly unraveled. He relaxed next to her on the sofa, still hard against her leg. Wrapping his arm around her he held her against him as she gathered herself back together. She had never felt anything that good in her life and now she felt wonderfully sated and fuzzy around the edges. Rumpelstiltskin said nothing as she cuddled closer to him, only adjust her so she could fit more snuggly against him before kissing the top of her head. Brushing his fingers over the small of her back lulled her and her mind went pleasantly blank, all thoughts of fear and abandonment gone. When she finally found her courage and shifted her head back so she could see him she was rewarded with a warm kiss that all but radiated his satisfaction. No, dinner had certainly not gone the way it normally did, although she thought she could get used to it being this way.

**Author's Note: Thank you for all the reviews, they've been lovely! I do enjoy getting them, so leave me your thoughts. Seriously, the button is right there. Click it…. Click the button… you know you want to ;)**


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

Exhausted beyond belief she trudged toward the inn knowing she needed coffee. She rather thought she should invest in one of the machines that made it now that she knew what the liquid could do, although she suspected she would never really enjoy the taste of it. However, it was the results she was after, the alertness the coffee brought, and so taste was irrelevant. Often she drank it so fast she scalded her tongue, something Granny admonished her for several times a week, but she wasn't overly bothered by the maternal grumbling. It was actually nice to have that again, to have someone treat her like a family member, to have another woman treat her that way. She thought she had missed too much not having her mother and prayed that if she ever had a child, as unlikely as that seemed, that she would not be forced to part from it in such a manner. She often felt cheated for loosing someone so important when she was so young, although she knew she was hardly the only one. Their last world had been a harsh place in a lot of ways. Children loosing parents was all too common.

Shaking the morose thoughts away she stepped inside to find the restaurant packed beyond its capacity. She was jostled almost immediately and shuffled to the counter, pressing through the throng, in an effort to get out of the way. If she hadn't been so desperate for a drink she would have retreated to her apartment and made herself a sandwich for lunch, but this was serious. She hadn't slept again last night after Rumple left, although she felt she should have been able to with the way he made her feel, with the comfort he brought her after, talking with her for nearly an hour about nothing of real consequence as they lay together on her couch. He had left her reluctantly last night, so much so that she nearly went back home with him because she found she didn't really want to be away from him. However, eventually he had left and she spent the rest of the night thinking over and replaying what had happened between them. She thought it was possible that she would have rather welcomed more happening, her curiosity now peaked, but he had made no move to do anything else. She fought a blush down at the thought, not needing anyone to see that in here, and managed to get Ruby's attention as the diner buzzed with noise.

The waitress came over to her looking harassed and in need of at least one extra set of hands to help her. She knew it must be a crazy day if that happened because Ruby truly loved the inn. Her friend was almost always happy to be here, telling her it felt good to make people happy and few things made people as happy as a full stomach. Having had a stomach that was generally empty for a large portion of her life she had to agree. "Hey, Belle." Ruby greeted nearly breathlessly. She wondered how the other woman could run around like this all day in heels even higher than the ones she was wearing. After a moment of thought she decided she didn't want to know as her own feet reminded her what it was like to be in them all day.

She smiled at the waitress. "I just need a large coffee please."

"When I'm not so busy we're talking about this new addiction of yours. It's not healthy the way you chug it down like this." The woman said as she turned toward the large carafe behind her and began to fill a foam take away cup, no doubt sensing her urge to flee the large crowd, or maybe it was simply a representation of her own desire to get out. As Ruby searched for a lid she reached into her purse to get some money. Pulling out a few dollars she glanced up and caught sight of her father at the other end of the counter. He appeared to be finishing up his own meal and must have heard her voice. He was watching her, and the moment she met his eyes he got up quickly and left, using his large size to wrestle his way out to the door as quickly as he could.

Her stomach clenched unhappily and she wondered if she could even keep the coffee down now. Ruby placed the cup in front of her and she handed her the money, which the waitress shoved in her apron as she was called to the other end of the room by a man in blue overalls that was covered in dark smudges. He was talking to James about something, looking neither happy nor upset, only very focused on the discussion. She thought she had seen him in that auto body shop more than once, but didn't think about it very deeply. All she wanted to do was get out of here now. To get away from the thought of her father no longer wanting her for reasons she had practically no control over, if she ever had any at all. But she had some control now, and she could leave this place if she wanted, and she did want to.

As she reached for her coffee she heard a horribly familiar feminine chuckle behind her, the one that often haunted her nightmares. "Trouble in paradise?" Her head whipped around and she found Regina right behind her with a coat over her arm. She was dressed in a well-cut pin stripe blue suit with a fitted vest over a crisp white blouse. She was smiling meanly, although that was no different than any other time they had interacted in the past. Hatred bubbled up inside of her and she turned away, grabbing her coffee. She had no interest in dealing with this woman, knew it was best simply to walk away. She stepped past her toward the door with her drink, refusing to even acknowledge the queen's existence. When she refused to respond the woman decided to push her luck, no doubt feeling secure here surrounded by people, even if no one was paying the slightest amount of attention to either of them. "What's the matter, dear? Doesn't daddy love you anymore? I told you not to get your hopes up if you recall."

Regina had picked the wrong day, the wrong moment, to cross her path and torment her. Adding a snide comment on top of everything else she was dealing with was the last straw. She was so past the edge of her control in a single instant that she didn't care that they were in a very public place, that the inn was filled to capacity, or that the sheriff was here. Her temper utterly and completely detonated at the self-satisfied smirk on the woman's face.

Without thinking she slapped her so hard the woman reeled to the left, her side slamming into the counter as her coffee fell, coating the floor with steaming liquid. The sound of flesh on flesh in combination with Regina's shout of pain and a stool hitting the ground as she knocked it off balance caught everyone's attention. A hush fell over the diner as she rushed forward and grabbed the sides of the other woman's vest. Wrenching her straight she immediately slammed her backwards over the counter hard enough to have her head smacking into it and bouncing back up. Regina let out another shout as she no doubt seriously bruised her back and head, the edge of the laminate digging into the queen as she held her at a terrible awkward angle.

When their gazes met she watched the woman steadily, the rage rolling off her palpable. "Say it again." She hissed demandingly.

Regina was silent as powerful things passed between them. They both knew the only reason the queen was still alive was because of her. At this moment she really thought she might change her mind and allow Rumple to kill her, or simply reach over and grab the knife that was sitting not six inches to the left and take care of it herself. The former queen was terrified, an odd turn around in their relationship, but trying to hide it by puffing up. The queen snarled. "Let me go or I'll make you."

She didn't blink as she looked down at the woman, her fingernails digging into Regina, her shirt a flimsy shield against the fury rolling through her. "Try." She hissed. "Nothing in any world would save you then." Regina shivered below her, unable to suppress the reaction no matter how much she was trying to hide her real feelings. To her shock and horror she began to taunt the woman, something she never thought herself capable of. "Well? Come on. Show everyone that you can make me let you go." She felt small spots of warmth under her fingertips and knew she was drawing blood, her nails having punctured the fabric of the woman's blouse as well as her ivory skin. "Let's have the whole town see what power you really have left."

Suddenly James snapped out of his shock and shouldered his way through the stunned crowd. "Belle!" He grabbed her around the waist and tried to drag her off the woman. "Enough!"

"Yes, dear, enough." Regina said as she straightened up, thinking she was now secure and safe. Unfortunately for her the prince didn't have the best grip on her. Surging forward out of his hold she lashed out, her hand connecting solidly with the other woman's nose. She screeched this time as she heard and felt a snap. A moment later Regina was bleeding all over the place as her broken nose gushed and satisfaction coursed through her as drops of red mixed with the brown puddle on the floor.

James cursed and grabbed her, actually picking her up off the ground as she fought to get to the woman that had tormented and tortured her. The crowd backed hastily away as she snarled threats at the former queen, flailing in the sheriff's arms. "You think Snow was bad, you hateful thing? Wait until I'm done with you!"

"Enough!" James barked at her as he somehow held onto her struggling form and yanked the door open at the same time. He pushed her out into the crisp fall air and she stumbled in her heels. "Go for a walk!" He pointed away from the diner. "I mean it!" He stepped forward when her gaze slid back toward Regina and grabbed her shoulders, turning her around and herding her out onto the sidewalk. He dropped his voice so only she could hear, although it was still firm. "Walk it off, Belle. I don't want to put you in a cell to cool down."

The thought sent a chill down her. It cooled her off just enough to turn on her heel and stalk off, but not before she spat something at him. "You should have let Rumple have his way. He was right to want her dead."

The man watched her warily, clearly having never expected anything so nasty or dangerous to come out of her mouth. Turning away she left quickly. Knowing she would most likely go into a fit and tear her apartment down around her ears if she went back there she simply started walking. She had never felt rage like this before and was utterly unprepared to deal with it on top of the morning she'd just had with her father, no matter how short the interaction was. As she headed west at random she heard hurried footsteps behind her. "Belle?" Ruby panted as she caught up with her. "Belle, are you all right? What was that about?"

"Go away!" She snarled.

Her friend was taken aback by her anger. "Belle?"

"Just go, Ruby!" She kept walking. "I'm not talking about this!"

The waitress stopped, she suspected largely because she heard her grandmother call for her from the front of the inn. As Ruby swayed in indecision she stepped around a corner and into an alley between two buildings, leaving her friend in the middle of the road. As her anger began to lower, which took a long time, she found herself walking toward Rumple's house without conscious thought. Considering it was just past noon she knew very well he wouldn't be home, but now that it occurred to her where she was headed she didn't change course.

Ten minutes later she was walking around the house, knowing she couldn't get inside and not wanting to anyway, and went into his garden. Taking a deep breath to try to calm down she went to a bench he had sitting prettily at the end of a little pathway that was surrounded by his rose bushes. He seemed nearly obsessed with the blossoms, although she had no idea why. He had never been interested in gardening before. He had rarely even gone outside before, detesting the sunlight as it went against his nature. Why he would want to spend so much time tending them, because bushes like this were certainly well taken care of and he was about as likely to allow a gardener in here as he was to turn into a fluffy bunny, was beyond her. Collapsing onto the bench she thought vaguely that she should go back and open the library again. It was Thursday after all, and she was supposed to be open until six, but she found herself utterly out of energy now that she was sitting.

Her mind began to wander down dark paths she tried so hard to push aside and she didn't have the will to fight them off anymore, she was too damn exhausted. Her nightmares were getting worse instead of better, and she didn't know what there was to do about it other than avoid sleep, which was ultimately impossible. She knew very well the fight with her father wasn't helping, he had torn down the few defenses she had managed to erect over the last few months, and now she had done something she was ashamed of. It was something she would have rightly been angry over Rumpelstiltskin doing. It was something they would fight over, something they would really have to talk about, and yet here she was.

By the time he found her she didn't know how long she had been sitting there except it had been long enough for her to get chilled all the way down to the bone. She had left her coat at the library and hadn't dressed very warmly today to begin with, thinking she would only be outside long enough to walk to Granny's and back again. She heard his back door open and close, and then he stepped around a bush and spotted her. He approached her calmly; not at all surprised to see her here, and she wondered if he had located her with the bracelet or if he simply had a hunch she would be here. However, how he knew where she was didn't much matter because she was a hundred percent sure how he knew about what happened. Ruby had gone and told him, or called him, or shouted it as she stood in the doorway so she wouldn't have to go all the way in the pawnshop. She knew this because her sky blue coat was folded neatly over his arm. Clearly he had been sent after her when she chased Ruby off. He had most likely called the jacket to him when he realized she didn't have it, or went to the library and her apartment to find them empty and locked.

Walking to her he sat down beside her without a word. She stayed silent too, staring blankly at the last of the roses that had survived the frost a few days before. Without a word he unfolded her jacket and put it over her lap. It fell over her bare legs like an oddly shaped blanket. She didn't move at all and she figured he had known she wasn't going to be helpful about this so he didn't even try to get her to sit forward so he could put it around her shoulders. After that he simply sat next to her quietly, turning his cane idly as he waited patiently for her to do something.

When her shivering became more noticeable he finally spoke, taking this into his own hands when it became clear she was going to be stubbornly quiet. "Would you like to go inside?" She was silent for several seconds before nodding in agreement. He stood up and offered her his hand. She took it and he helped her up as she caught her coat. He paused when she was standing, pulling her hand up higher and uncurling a few of her fingers with his thumb. She followed his line of sight and saw that she had dried blood under her fingernails. He simply raised an eyebrow before turning and leading her inside.

The back door slid open on it's own the way the doors had in the castle, and he ushered her in before pushing it shut with his cane. Without a word he led her to the kitchen sink and turned the water on before taking her coat from her. Reaching out she pushed the soap dispenser down and began to wash her hands, scratching at the underside of her nails to get rid of the blood. When she was done she washed the soap away and he handed her a small towel. She dried her hands and set it down on the counter. When she was done he finally asked her a question about what happened. "Did she hurt you?"

"No." She said with surprisingly little emotion or interest. All she could feel now was her fatigue. She knew later she would feel more, but right now there was nothing and she was glad of it. She wasn't sure she could handle feeling anything else today. She wasn't sure she could handle feeling anything else for the foreseeable future if she were honest with herself.

He was watching her closely now, but what he was looking for she didn't know. "She said something then." She shrugged and he frowned as her gaze wandered over the kitchen. She hadn't been in here since she moved out so many months ago now. She found she missed this house the same way she missed him. "What did she say?"

"Nothing important." She replied.

"I find that hard to believe." He responded, still as calm as ever. "You aren't inherently violent." A shiver ran down her that had nothing to do with her still being chilled from sitting outside for far too long. Reaching out he cupped her cheek gently, all but forcing her to feel something with the touch. "She won't bother you again, dearest."

No, she wouldn't. She doubted Regina would ever get near her again unless circumstances drastically changed, and Rumpelstiltskin certainly didn't need to confront Regina about it. The impact of what she had done hit her all at once and her lip quivered badly. His expression shifted to alarm as she fought back her emotions valiantly, not wanting to deal with them in front of him. Despite her best efforts a single tear tracked down her cheek and he made that same odd crooning noise he had the first night she was here and he was trying to assure her she was safe. She was amazed he wasn't bolting for the door at the sight of her this distraught. It must have shown on her face because he drew her to him carefully as he tried to sooth her. "It's all right, Belle."

Exhausted, upset, and cold she leaned into him and tucked her face into the spot between his shoulder and his neck. He held her to him, rubbing her back and neck in an effort to calm her down. "I'm so tired." She whispered at last.

"Why don't you stay here for a little while and take a nap?" The thought of that, of the dreams that were sure to come regardless of where she was sleeping pushed her all the way over the edge she had been teetering on for the last week or so. There was no way to stop the emotional dam now that he had neatly broken right through it with his simple, well meant suggestion. A sob tore out of her and he went stiff against her at the sound. "Belle?" Her only response was to cry as she held onto the front of his jacket so hard there was really no way for him to get away unless he used his magic or cut the garment from his body with one of the kitchen knives. "Hey…" He tightened his hold on her. "What's wrong?" She shook her head and kept crying, unable to speak, which she was sure was causing him to panic. His whole body went rigid in alarm at having her break down in his arms. He wasn't good with emotions unless he was manipulating them in other people to suite his purposes.

When the sobs got so strong that her entire body was shaking she heard the fear get the best of him. "Belle, Belle, it's all right." He tried to hold her, rub her back, and rock her all at once, which was a complete disaster as he nearly sent them toppling to the floor twice. She was leaning all her weight on him and he only had one good leg to begin with. After several minutes he nearly started to beg. "Stop, love. Please, I don't know what's wrong." He kissed the top of her head as best he could with her hunched into him. "What's wrong? I can't fix it if I don't know."

"You can't." She cried, barely understandable around the tears. "You can't fix it. I'm too broken now." And she must be. There was no other reason for her to be acting this way, no other reason for her father to have turned her out, no other reason for her to have attacked Regina.

"You're not broken." He said, filled with concern and hurt for her. "There's nothing wrong with you." He was trying to make her look at him. "There's never been anything wrong with you."

Another hard sob ripped out of her. "I feel that way."

"You aren't." He said. "You're only upset right now."

"No." She cried. "I am broken. You hate things that don't work right."

"You aren't a thing, you're a person." He said, now really trying to calm her down. "And you're my person." He hugged her tightly. "Stop this, dearie, there's nothing wrong with you. I could never hate you for anything."

She started to relax at that promise and her crying slowly eased off. She figured it helped that he was murmuring reassurances into her hair about her being perfect for him. Considering her state of mind that helped a lot. When she finally calmed down enough that she was only sniffling he kissed her head and she felt bad for doing this to him. "I'm so sorry, Rumple."

He simply handed her the silk handkerchief out of his jacket pocket and slipped it into her hand. She took it and lifted her head so she could wipe at her face, thinking he should have given her this when she started crying since the shoulder of his jacket was now a total mess. She was sure she wasn't looking much better than the fabric at the moment either. "Let's sit down and I'll make us tea."

She hiccupped. "You and your tea."

He still had a hand on her side as they stood there. "Constants have a way of keeping us stable." He told her gently. "Come on, dearest." He took her into his sitting room and set her on the couch. He left her briefly and when he came back he brought the tea on a tray full of snacks he knew very well would tempt her. They were all her favorite things. She hiccupped again at the sight, touched that he had all of the things she liked in the house on the off chance she might come over. He set the tray down on the table in front of the couch and sat down beside her.

Feeling all out of sorts she wiped at her eyes again. "You always have raspberries for me."

He shrugged and picked up the bowl of fruits and set them in her lap. "You like them."

"I'm a wreck." She said as she pushed her hair back out of her eyes. It had come loose from the pins she had holding it back somewhere along the line.

"You're beautiful."

"Liar." She rasped as she set the bowl back on the table. "Can I use your washroom to clean up?"

"You don't need to ask, Belle."

She nodded and got up, still wiping at her eyes. "I'll be right back."

"Take your time."

Walking up the stairs she avoided looking at him. She was embarrassed, near to mortified, and she knew he was just being nice about this. She was relieved when she reached the top of the stairs and turned around the corner so it was impossible for him to see her. Stepping into the bathroom she shut the door and pulled a washcloth out from the cabinet he kept them in. Turning on the taps she soaked it in cool water and washed her face off. When she was done she pressed the cloth against her eyes and let out a low sigh as she tried to finish calming down. After a few minutes she removed the cloth and looked at herself in the mirror. Yes, she was a mess. Sighing, she knew there was little she could do about her still puffy eyes and red nose, but her hair was a different story.

Reaching back she took out the bobby pins she had it up with and set them on the edge of the sink. Grabbing his comb out from behind the mirror cabinet, which still fascinated her, she brushed it back in order and then gathered it up and twisted it up into a bun the way Ruby had showed her when she came begging for tips on how to deal with it. Pleased that she got it to work she repined it in place and slowly let her hands down, waiting for it to fall or spring rebelliously out of the grip of the pins. When her hair stayed firmly in place she felt a little better about herself for getting it to work so well the first time.

Knowing she couldn't stay up here much longer without him worrying even more than he no doubt was she opened the door and headed back to the stairs. She was just about to turn out of the hall, had braced herself to face him again, when she heard a firm knock on the front door. She froze where she was, hidden behind the wall, and heard Rumpelstiltskin moving downstairs. A moment later he opened the door and spoke. "Charming." He said calmly. "What can I do for you?"

"Is she here?" She heard.

"Who?" He asked.

"You know who." The other man said in annoyance. "I need to talk to her."

"It's hard to help when you aren't being specific." He said in that teasing lilt he used just to annoy people.

"Belle." James snapped. "Regina is threatening to press assault charges. Her nose is broken and she definitely has two black eyes. If she'll apologize I think Regina will-"

"No." Rumpelstiltskin interrupted.

"What?"

"Belle won't be apologizing for anything." He said in a way that reminded her very, very much of the dangerous imp that he was. "And if Regina would like to press charges I'll be paying her a visit to discuss it as Belle's legal representation." There was a slight pause. "Be sure to mention that when you talk to her."

She had a feeling the two were sizing each other up. "What's going on, Gold? I've never even heard Belle raise her voice before. She went off like a bomb."

"As I recall we had a deal. You stay out of my business and I'll stay out of yours. Belle is my business. So far I've kept my end of the bargain. Don't break our agreement, dearie, you won't enjoy my attention."

"It becomes my business when your lover attacks someone." He responded. "Like it or not assault is illegal here."

"Regina is hardly just someone is she?" He asked. "Now, I'm entertaining my lover as you so _charmingly_ put it. Off you go to tame your werewolf, or sword fight with the little prince, or whatever it is you do when you aren't annoying me."

James let out a low growl. "Look, tell her I'll be talking to her soon. You can't keep her hidden in here forever." She heard the porch creak as the larger man turned around. "And at least give her a half decent story to tell if I'm not going to get the truth. Most of the town saw that."

The door shut with a slight snap and Rumpelstiltskin muttered something under his breath that she was rather thankful she couldn't hear as she suspected it was not very flattering to James. She stepped down the stairs and he glanced up when he heard her on the landing. Her eyes slid from him to the door and then slowly back again. "The tea is getting cold." He told her as if nothing odd were happening, as if he weren't doing damage control or coming up with a story right now to let her tell that would no doubt smooth this whole incident over. As if he weren't planning all sorts of nasty things for Regina if she didn't back off at this very moment.

Slowly, she walked down the stairs and he waited for her at the bottom. When she got to him he rubbed her arm gently and they walked back into the sitting room together. She sat back down and tried to smooth out her wrinkled skirt. He busied himself with making them both tea, but she knew very well he had all his considerable attention on her as she fidgeted, despite evidence to the contrary. After he had hers ready he handed it to her and she took it with a soft, raspy thank you. He relaxed back into his seat as she sat there uncomfortably. She finally broke the silence. "Aren't you going to ask what happened?"

"No." He said as he sipped at his tea. "I assume you'll tell me if you want me to know." Unsure of what to say to that she watched him nervously. She really had been expecting him to demand some sort of explanation, especially after what she heard James say. "Belle, I'm not here to judge or punish you. If you want to talk about this then we will, if you don't then we won't." This was certainly a different approach to issues than the one she had taken with him. She wasn't sure if she liked it any more than he liked her questions. Him giving her space like this made her incredibly nervous, although she had no idea why. She'd much rather have him either get angry or admonish her than allow her to slink out of consequences.

"I hurt her." She had never in her life hurt anyone on purpose before. The woman hadn't even been trying to physically harm her, which would have been the only reasonable excuse to such violence in her mind.

He was less than concerned with Regina. "She hurt you first, and far worse."

"That's not an excuse." She told him.

"It's a reason." He told her. "You don't seem eager to be excused."

She flinched noticeably at his very accurate perception. "I should feel bad about it."

"Why?" He asked.

She looked up at him warily. "That wasn't right, Rumpelstiltskin."

He was watching her closely. "It wasn't entirely wrong either. She provoked you and you reacted. You're human and she can be incredibly stupid. If Regina had any sense she would have stayed far away from you and not just because of me." Setting his tea down he took hers and set that aside as well. Reaching over he caught her hands. "You are one of the sweetest and most giving people I have ever met in my long life, Belle." She met his eyes in surprise. "But you were put in a dark hole and abandoned for a very long time. That would change anyone. Frankly, I'm amazed you're like this."

"Like this?"

"Like you were." He answered. "You have no right to be. You should be enraged, or twisted, or insane. You should be hell bent on destroying Regina for doing that, or me for letting you get caught that way." He squeezed her hands. "But you're all but unchanged despite it, at least in the important ways." He really had no idea how unstable she was. Maybe it was better he didn't know. At least if he believed she was okay she could pretend it was true right along with him.

Pulling her hands away she surprised them both by shifting forward and hugging him tightly. His arms went back around her, this time without the worry of before. Pulling her legs up under her she leaned into him and he shifted them so he could hold her more easily. She allowed him to move her and soon they were cuddled up snuggly together with her all but in his lap. She was curled up against his side with her legs crooked up over his the same way as last night. Lifting is own legs up he flicked his finger and the footstool in front of the chair floated over and slid neatly under them. Pleased, he relaxed fully, kissing her forehead warmly as he held her in an easy and now sure embrace.

When he felt her finally begin to unwind he hummed in approval. Letting her go briefly he grabbed a blanket off the back of the couch and unfolded it before draping it over her in much the same way he had her coat. "You can't be comfortable with your shoes on." He commented.

"If I get any more comfortable I'm going to fall asleep." She told him.

"Why don't you want to sleep?" He asked, having sussed out from her break down that this was troubling to her for some reason.

"Nightmares." She whispered unhappily.

He stroked his hand over her hair. "You won't have a nightmare here. They're afraid of me." Despite herself she smiled slightly. "I'm quite serious, dearie. Did you have any nightmares when you were here with me?"

Only when she woke up alone in bed. "Not when you were with me."

"I'll be here with you." He promised. She only hesitated for a moment before she kicked her heels off. They plunked to the wood floor and he rubbed her side soothingly. Resting her head against his shoulder she caught his hand with hers and rubbed her thumb over his knuckles once she had his arm looped around her waist firmly. He allowed her to move him anyway she pleased and that made her feel a little better.

When she went still she felt him gearing up to ask something else and she simply couldn't bear to hear whatever it was. Even if he was going to try to justify what she had done, or distance her from her own actions, she couldn't stand any more right now. She didn't want to talk about this anymore, didn't want to talk about herself. It made her feel guilty when there was something much more important going on, so she simply changed the subject. "Have you learned anything else about the line?"

Rumpelstiltskin sighed heavily. "A little, but not enough to break it yet."

"Can I help?" She asked, really wanting to.

"Not in any way I can think of." He answered, his eyes fixated on their hands. "If you can I'll let you know."

"I want to help you." She told him, thinking it wasn't right that he was the only one that truly wanted out of here for a real reason. She couldn't imagine how frustrated he must be so close to the one person he had been trying to get to for centuries. How hard it must be to try to fix a mistake made so very long ago.

"You are helping me." He told her, resting his cheek on the crown of her hand. "You've been helping me for a long time."

"You help me too." She told him.

"I never helped you the way you needed help." He said softly.

"You're the only one helping me the way I need help right now." She told him honestly. "And before you were the only person that ever really knew me."

"That isn't true." He said.

"It is. That's what I needed before. Someone to know me." She replied. "You were the only person to ever listened to me. No one else listened. They heard me sometimes, but they didn't _listen_."

He shifted a little and murmured into her hair. "I'm still listening."

"It's hard for me to talk now." She admitted.

"I've learned some manner of patience since I let you go, foolish as that was. Take your time. I'll be listening when you're ready." Squeezing his hand she lifted it up and kissed it gently. He just kept tracing their hands with his gaze. She allowed them to slide back down to the couch and let herself close her eyes. She didn't think she could fight sleep off any longer, not with him against her, not with the lull of his heartbeat under her ear.

Still, she had one more thing to ask before she gave in. "Wake me up if I start to dream."

"You won't have a nightmare." He murmured gently. "Rest now. This place is safe. You don't have to fight so hard here."

She shivered at that, realizing she was fighting most of the time, even if it was only with herself, and her past. "Rumple-"

"Shh." He murmured. "I can feel the shadows clinging to you." He leaned back a little, getting comfortable so she could be comfortable. "You don't need to explain it to me. I already know."

That made her hurt for him. It was so much easier to hurt for him than for herself. Letting out a low breath she watched the sunlight coming in through the large bay windows. Finding it unlikely that he could keep her from dreaming she shook her head, but closed her eyes anyway. It was impossible for her to stay awake much longer and she'd rather have him wake her up then end up flailing awake alone on her couch, or worse, be jolted into wakefulness when she fell off it again. Perhaps this once she could allow herself to believe that it was safe to sleep, although how he could protect her from her own mind she didn't know.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

When she woke up late in the night it wasn't due to fear or panic, not this time. She woke up because it seemed that on occasion Rumpelstiltskin snored. The sound was so out of the norm for her that her eyes fluttered open and she looked around in confusion. Not only was she lying down now, with him warm at her back and snoring into her ear, they were in his bed and snuggled warmly under his comforter. He must have moved them to a more comfortable location while she was sleeping and she found she didn't mind. Behind her he snored again and she laughed quietly, turning over to face him. His arm was draped limply over her middle and she saw it was dark out, although what time it really was she didn't know. He didn't have a clock in his room for whatever reason. She thought it was quite possible that after three hundred years or so time started to loose it's meaning. It certainly hadn't mattered to her as she sat rotting in her cell, no more than it meant another long day of boredom, regret, and sorrow. Regardless, she supposed it didn't matter because she was still tired and he was still here.

Pressing her head under his chin she shook him gently. She didn't really want to wake him up, but there was no way she could sleep with this kind of noise right beside her. He muttered something unintelligible and she mumbled sleepily. "You're snoring, Rumple."

"I don't snore." He insisted, still mostly asleep.

She rolled her eyes, amused. "Fine, you're channeling a dragon in your sleep."

"Ridiculous. There aren't dragons here." He said before readjusting himself around her and drifting somewhere between sleep and wakefulness, although she thought he was hovering closer to sleep than anything. She cuddled closer to him, enjoying being able to snuggle with him. He grunted softly as she jostled into him and promptly conformed to her. "Going to knock us off the bed." He informed her.

"You won't let me fall." She responded with surety. "Is it time to get up? I don't want to get up yet."

"No, it's not time to get up." He reached up and began to stroke the back of her head gently. "You can go back to sleep."

That was the best news she had heard in a long time. Murmuring her approval of this information she slid her arm over his slim waist and made herself comfortable. Despite her waking him and bumping him she could tell he was content. His fingers dug their way into her hair and soon he was rubbing her scalp in the loveliest manner. She let out a hum of approval and stretched out along him. "Nice."

He rubbed his way down to her neck and she cooed. Her whole body tingled at the sensations and she pressed into his hand. Palming her neck at that reaction he rubbed her for several minutes until she went limp and still again and then kissed her head and pulled the blanket more firmly over them. At some point her shoulder had become exposed to the night air and he couldn't have her getting cold. He must have thought she was asleep, and she nearly was, because he rubbed her back gently and mumbled to himself. "My Belle."

She supposed in a lot of ways she was, but he was hers too so she wasn't overly bothered by his possessive comment. Feeling content with that she slipped easily back to sleep and didn't wake up again until midmorning. She probably would have slept longer, the gods knew she needed the rest, but she found herself alone in bed. Rumple was trying to get a clean suit out of his closet quietly, so as not to disturb her, but she woke up anyway. She wasn't sure what part of her was alarmed by him not being next to her, but it certainly alerted her to his absence. "You let me sleep too long." She told him as she stretched out under the comforter and noted the brightness of the room. Already she knew she was late to work with the way the sun was shining in the windows, but simply didn't want to move.

He shrugged as he pulled out a crisp grey suit. "You needed the rest." He told her. "The library can stay closed one day."

She hid her face in the pillow, not wanting to get out of this ridiculously luxurious bed. It was much softer than the couch at her apartment. "Ruby will think something happened. I'm always at Granny's in the mornings."

"She'll think you've decided to sleep in. Stop your fretting." He headed toward the door after snagging a tie off the special rack he had for them. "Besides, they know you're with me. Do you want breakfast?"

What she really wanted was for him to come back to bed with her. However, she'd been asleep for twelve hours easily, and it was probably long enough. "I can help."

"I'd rather you be lazy." He told her as he checked a seam on the shoulder of the jacket he was holding. "You've gone too long without rest."

"I was lazy all yesterday afternoon." She informed him. "I think it's your turn to be lazy. I don't mind making breakfast."

"Another day." He said as he walked by.

She shocked herself by pouting at him, on purpose. "Rumpelstiltskin." He actually paused at the tone, swaying mid-step as she watched him. "How long would it take you to make breakfast?"

He answered, his eyes locked on her lower lip. "Half an hour."

"I'm not hungry. Come over here and be lazy for that half an hour you would have spent cooking." Looking pleased by her logic he set his clothes over the back of a chair so they wouldn't wrinkle and then sat down gingerly on the side of the bed. Refusing to have that she grabbed his hand and tugged. "We spent all night pressed up against one another, I don't see why you've gone and gotten all standoffish now. Especially after you moved me up here from the couch. Finding myself in your bed is a bit suggestive really."

He looked doubtful all at once. "I wanted you comfortable."

"Good news." She pulled again and he slid down beside her with a soft wump as he hit the sheets and pillows. "Because I'm more comfortable when I can use you as my pillow." Letting out a shocked little laugh he stretched out on his back and she promptly put her head on his chest. Before he could do anything she had her arm over his waist and was pressing her cheek against the spot over his heart, hearing it beating a little faster than normal. Lifting his hand up he set it on her shoulder and his thumb ran over the fabric of her dress. "This is much better than breakfast." She informed him.

Turning his head he set the side of his head on the top of hers. His lips were resting on her forehead and his nose tickled at her curls. "Are you bothered I brought you up here?"

"No." She answered honestly. "This is much more comfortable than the couch."

He let out a low breath and she let herself relax fully into him. Lifting the hand that wasn't caressing her shoulder he ran his fingers over hers as they rested on his chest. Her breath caught as they ran up to her wrist to touch the bracelet he'd given her. "You're still sleeping on your couch?"

"Yes." She answered, her finger tracing a button on his shirt. "I can go in my room now, but only for a few minutes at a time. I can't sleep in there."

His lips pressed warmly against her forehead. "Don't worry yourself about it, dearie."

"It's not normal." She sighed.

"Nothing about our lives is normal." He told her. "We could move the bed into your living room."

"As a reminder I can't sleep in my own room?" She asked, sarcasm tinting her voice.

He ignored her annoyance with her own limitations. "So you can sleep properly."

"That has nothing to do with the couch."

He kissed her forehead again. "It would be a good thing to try, love."

"Maybe." She admitted, although she still didn't want to do that. It felt a lot like giving up and that wasn't in her nature. She believed that if she kept trying eventually she would be able to succeed at this.

He tried a different route. "You didn't seem to have a problem sleeping in here."

"No." She agreed, knowing what he was trying to do. She could hear him trying to weave a deal in the way his voice subtly changed pitch. She didn't know if that said more about him or about her that she could tell, that she was always listening for it. "I'm not ready to move back yet, Rumple."

"Okay." He said, dropping the subject the moment he knew she was onto him. At least he had enough respect for her not to push it at her.

She felt bad at once, although she knew she was right about this. "We've been doing so much better like this."

He let out a low sigh. "I know." And she heard that he believed it. "I didn't mean to force the issue."

Lifting her head up she shifted up the bed and met his eyes. "You're not the reason I haven't come back yet." She said honestly. "I think yesterday proved I am. I'm not going to make you deal with someone unstable."

"Dearest." He said gently, his arms going around her and drawing her down to him again. "You aren't unstable. You aren't broken." He shifted so they were on their sides facing one another, holding her close to him. "You've been hurt. That's what happened. That's why you act the way you act. You aren't an issue to be dealt with. You're my princess."

She watched him, tracing his jaw and liking the stubble that was growing there despite herself. She was curious to know if anyone else had ever seen him so unkempt before or if she were as unique as she thought. "I'm not a princess." She told him again tiredly. "I'm not even a lady anymore. I'm only a librarian."

"You're a princess to me." He told her seriously before beginning to tease, trying to lighten the mood, which she half appreciated. "I'm going to make you a crown so you believe me." That got a small amused smile out of her and he relaxed a little as his eyes sparkled. "Gold and pearls I think. And sapphires to match your eyes."

She watched him, knowing very well he would make her one if she showed an instant of approval of that idea. But she didn't want a crown, or gold, or dresses, or whatever else he thought a princess should have. She wanted something else, she wanted an answer to something she had been curious about for a long time. "Why am I special?"

He frowned. "What?"

"Why am I special to you?" She clarified. "You've met so many people. I know you're older than you look. You've been alive since at least the first ogre wars, if not longer. You've met so many other people, so many other women, and we were apart for so long. I don't understand what about me made me matter to you. I'm not anyone special. I never had money, or grace, or magic, or any of the other things that make someone special. Why wasn't I just one more deal?" He was watching her as if she was asking him the most ridiculous question he had ever heard. He was simply mystified, as if it were so simply she should know, but she didn't. "Why?" She insisted.

"How can you think you aren't special?"

"Because I'm not." She answered. "I'm just…me."

It was clear he had not a clue where to begin. It was as if he were trying to find a way to describe something so very vast that there was no place to start, no way to articulate what it was about her that made her matter. After several seconds he tried. "I may have listened to you, but you saw me. No one, not one person save Bae ever looked at me and saw someone worth caring for. I was a poor man, or a cripple, or a coward, and later a beast that spun lies and deals. That was all I ever was save for a few short years where someone called me father. You…" He stroked her face, his hand sliding back into her hair. "You saw a man worth being brave for. You saw someone worth loving. You made me think I might be able to be more than a monster."

She wished he would stop thinking of himself that way. It was a hateful thought that was slowly wearing away at the humanity he was somehow hanging onto. "Rumple, you aren't a monster."

He shifted closer still. "That's why you're special." He whispered. "You see with something more powerful than your eyes." He cupped her neck and pulled her face to his, barely touching his lips to hers. Shivering at the sensation her eyes fluttered closed and he whispered to her as he pulled back a little, his rough brogue vibrating through her. "That's an amazing gift, to be able to see a man instead of a beast." He smiled a little sadly. "Maybe one day living with me again won't be so unappealing." She kissed him at once as her stomach knotted, and after a moment she drew away as guilt pooled in her belly. He saw the unease in her expression and frowned. "Belle?"

"I need to tell you something." She said softly, bracing herself. "I should have told you before."

"All right." He said.

She shifted uncomfortably. "I did move out at first because of our fight…" She hesitated badly before pushing forward. "But that's not why I haven't come back yet. I do want to come back to you, Rumpelstiltskin."

He frowned more deeply. "Then why don't you?"

She wasn't sure how to get into this. She had been avoiding it for a long time now. It would have been smart to think about it before, but she had been too frightened of him leaving her to even contemplate it. She thought she might be even more terrified now that her father made it clear where he stood, which appeared to be far away from her. Taking a breath she steadied herself. "I needed to be sure I could take care of myself again. I needed to be sure I was stable. I couldn't risk finding out I wasn't when we were together all the time. I was scared you would send me back if I wasn't better, or that I would disrupt whatever it is you were plotting here. I thought if I wasn't it would be easier to hide living alone."

"Hide? Hide what?"

She rubbed the spot over his heart, loosing eye contact. "That I might be crazy."

"Belle, I told you that you aren't broken."

"Rumple, I was crazy." She lifted her eyes again. "That was what the curse did to me. You know my happiness was always the control my thoughts gave me. That's what always made me feel safe, being able to think through things. The magic must have known." She wasn't sure what else it could have been. She doubted even Regina would have thought it up even if she did want her locked up somewhere secret. "That's why I don't know how to work anything in this world. That was why I had no idea what a phone was when you showed me yours that morning. You were right, when the spell broke I still had all my false memories, but the fake me had always been in the asylum, at least since I was very little. The fake me used to hurt myself all the time. I saw and heard things that weren't real. That's why I was there." She gulped as horribly understanding flooded his face. "The only reason I managed to find you when I got out was because they had switched my medication a few weeks before to something that actually worked. I was having a good day on top of that too. It's actually fairly amazing I didn't forget what I was supposed to do when I got outside with the way I was. I honestly don't know how I managed to find you, or even remember the name I was given to ask who you were when I did find you."

She pushed on, wanting to get this all out. "I really thought all this was another delusion after we got back to the house that night. I didn't think you were real for almost four days. I didn't think anything was real." She felt as lost now, at this moment, as she had then. "And then when my father tried to send me over the line… I knew what would have happened. I would have been crazy all over again. That's why I was so angry when you got me loose. If you had been any later you would have had to send me back to the asylum." She made a helpless motion. "I didn't really mean what I said about not wanting to see you again. I was just so upset with everything."

Rumpelstiltskin was trying to find a place to start. "Your father tried to send you over the line knowing that?" Rumpelstiltskin all but spat. "The gods only know what would have happened to you out in the woods in that state!"

"I'm not sure he knew what had happened to me. He didn't seem to know I wasn't with you the whole time." She said. "And I never got a chance to say before that man dragged me to the mines."

"How could he not have known?" He was gearing up for a real fit now.

"Maybe we weren't related in this fake life." She suggested, having wondered this herself. They wouldn't be the only ones that happened to in this town, that was for sure. She was certain, even with their disagreements that her father would have never wanted her to be insane. At least she hoped he would have chosen having her in love with a man he hated to that. "I don't have any fake memories about him. I don't have any memories of anything before the cell. Nothing clear at any rate. I think the drugs and magic muddled it all together on purpose." He growled low in his chest, pushing himself up so he was sitting again. When he looked toward the window she sat up too, tucking her legs underneath herself to stay balanced. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I was afraid I was still crazy and if you found out you would send me back."

"You're never going back! I can't believe you thought I would ever let that happen again!" He snapped as he stood all the way up. He moved to the window, his cane tapping angrily on the wooden floorboards, and yanked the curtains open so hard they were nearly ripped from their metal hooks. She said nothing as he snarled out at the world, her hands toying with the coverlet as she watched him nervously. After a moment he turned back to face her. "You're the one constantly insisting on honesty and trust and yet you kept this from me." He wasn't yelling, but his voice was clipped.

"I know." She said, her voice strangled. "You're right. I should have told you." He was right to be angry about this. She didn't blame him for it at all and so she made no attempt to defend herself.

He said nothing for what felt like an eternity as she fidgeted, looking down at her hands. Finally, he spoke. "Is there anything else you haven't told me?" He asked. When she visibly flinched she heard him tap the cane hard on the floor as he tried to vent his frustration. "Well?" He asked.

"I had an argument with my father last week." She said so quietly she was actually amazed he heard her.

"You've gone to see him?" She couldn't tell if he were bothered or relived. She doubted he cared for her father's sake, but maybe he thought it would make her life better. "Why did you feel the need to hide that?" He must have known eventually she would go to see him the same way she had come back to him. He was no doubt simply waiting for it to happen, had most likely made any number of plans and provisions for when it did. He saw no reason to be bothered by it, other than his general dislike of her father, which she supposed he was willing to deal with if it kept her happy. Of course, he didn't know what had happened between them or he may well have done everything in his power to keep her away from the flower shop to save her the pain. Either that or thrust her at it to assure himself that he was the only thing she had. Both scenarios seemed equally as likely to her.

What was there to say? "I don't know." She said after a moment. "I didn't know what to think. I didn't know what to do, or what to say. Maybe I needed time to think."

"Think about what?" He asked with rather strained patience.

"Why did you hurt my father?" She asked quietly. She knew he had taken the one thing Rumpelstiltskin cherished here, but knew there was more to the story than that. "He said you hurt him, Rumpelstiltskin." She was all but begging him to explain with her eyes. "Over my cup?"

He looked sharply back out the window and he said nothing for a long time. "I thought he was the one that… Belle, I do regret that. I took my anger out on the wrong person."

"You thought what?" She prompted.

"I was told when you got home to him in the other world that he had you sent to clerks to be cleansed. They hurt you, tortured you. They broke you and burned you until you couldn't stand it anymore. Eventually you threw yourself off a tower and died to end it." His face was blank and his voice devoid of emotion. "That's what I knew. I even went to the place looking to be sure. Regina planted men there that told me the same. The villagers nearby told me they'd seen a woman jump, seen her taken away broken and bloody. They said she had chestnut hair and thought she must have been pretty before the burns. That's why I was so sure you were dead. Clearly I should have dug up the grave as well, but I couldn't bring myself to disturb the peace I thought you had finally found." His hand tightened around the head of his cane as he remembered his grief, and no doubt his rage too. "I thought he sent you to that hell. I kept away in the other world, because I knew you would have hated me for killing him no matter what he had done to you. Believe it or not I did understand the sacrifice you made to save him. I know the strength of family bonds better than most. I tried to stay away from him here too, but I couldn't, not for that, not with him so close. I harassed him and took his truck when he was late on a payment. Regina told him to steal your cup from me to get even. I lost my temper."

She could only imagine what that must have looked like. "Why didn't you tell me he was here when I asked?"

"Because I am as I am. I'm a selfish coward." He answered. "I don't have an excuse for that." He kept his eyes on the glass. "I couldn't stand to loose you a second time, although I nearly did anyway." She said nothing, taking in the information and simply putting it away once she looked at it with no more interest than she had for horses or sword fights. The silence must have stretched longer than she thought, because he jolted her out of her thoughts. "Belle?"

"Yes?"

"Are you angry?"

"No." She replied. "Although I think I should be. But to be fair you should be angry with me too."

He let out a low breath and finally turned back to her. "What happened then?" He asked. "You wouldn't have kept it from me unless something happened."

"My father thinks I'm ruined." She answered dully. "He won't see me again as long as I'm associating with you."

He tapped his cane again, clearly thinking deeply, before nodding to himself. "I understand." He said, his voice tight. "It's all right, Belle."

"How is it all right?" She asked, really wanting to know.

Shaking his head he turned away from her so his back was to her completely. "You go back. I'll stay away, I promise."

"What are you talking about?"

He stared out the window, his back ramrod straight. "Go back to your father." He said simply.

She felt as if he had stabbed her in the heart. "Don't you want me either?" She asked after she managed to find her voice.

His shoulders twitched. "You shouldn't have to pick, dearie." He said calmly. "Go home."

"No, I shouldn't." She said tightly. "And you're trying to pick for me." He stilled again and she watched his back with a look of devastation on her face. "I _shouldn't _have to pick. Are you going to try to make me do that too?"

"No, Belle." He said softly as he rotated back to look at her. "I'm not, but this isn't simple. We'll always be at odds your father and I. There's too much history between us for it to be any other way."

"I won't pick." She said stubbornly. Because she shouldn't have to. No one should have to pick between two people that they loved, two people that they considered family.

He watched her seriously. "Haven't you already?"

"I've chosen to make my own life. I can't force either of you to be in it. All I can do is ask you in and hope you accept the invitation. For now my father has decided to stay away, but I told him where I was if he changes his mind." She shook her head a little. "There are other things I haven't told you, Rumple, but I'm honestly not sure I ever will. I'm not trying to lie about it." She didn't know how else to say this.

"Perhaps that's one thing we are forced to accept in one another."

Maybe it was. But wasn't that was what it meant to be with someone? Didn't you have to accept the good with the bad? "I'm sorry I kept things from you. I shouldn't have done that."

He sighed softly, looking outside yet again. "Fear touches even the most steadfast of hearts. It's no fairer of me to expect constant bravery from you than it is for you to expect constant restraint from me."

Slipping off the bed she stepped up behind him and set her forehead on his shoulder as a sign of contrition. "I do want to come back." She said again softly. "I just need to be sure about myself first. I have to be sure I'm strong enough to be the partner you need."

His lip curled up at the corner. "I think your thrashing of Regina proves you're strong enough."

"I think that proves I'm farther from my goal than I thought." She rejoined. "My heads not right."

Turning, he dislodged her from his shoulder and she straightened up. She watched him and he studied her quietly for some time, reaching up to cup her face. After a few seconds she pressed into his touch and she saw any remaining anger drain out of him. "Then let's work on getting it right." Well, that wasn't a disagreement. She knew he would never be satisfied with her living away from him, but he wasn't making her feel guilty about it, and he wasn't trying to trick her back here.

"I don't know how to fix it." She said softly. "I only know that something isn't right anymore. I don't feel like I used to."

He was quiet for a moment. "I think I know someone that might be able to help you."

A blast of hope filled her at that. "You do?"

"I do." He agreed as he rubbed her cheek again. "I'll call him once I get you to work." He smiled at her, although it didn't reach his eyes. "You're a bit of a mess, dearie. Let me get you back home so you can clean up."

Jumping on the good will she gave him a small, perky smile. "Can I drive?"

He groaned, letting his hands drop. "If you'd like."

She giggled happily as he gathered up his clothes. "Give me a few minutes to get dressed."

As he headed toward the door, no doubt headed toward the bathroom, she stopped him. "Rumple?"

He paused and looked over his shoulder at her. She smiled a little, hoping to win him over before she made her request. "I don't really want to be by myself today. Could I sit with you in your shop?"

He was pleased, she could tell. "What about the library?"

She shrugged a little. "I'm already late, and besides it was closed for twenty-eight years before I opened it again. I don't think one more day will make much of a difference. I'll stay out of the way."

"If I wanted you to stay out of the way I wouldn't let you near me." He told her. "You know I have some books there you may not have seen before."

"You do?" She lit up at that and his lip twitched as he left the room. She thought that was rather a terrible tease, to not tell her before leaving, and rolled her eyes. She heard the bathroom door shut and turned around. Going to the bed she made it quickly, fluffing the pillows back up before she left it alone. She was sure Rumpelstiltskin would be more annoyed that she did this than leaving it a mess, he seemed to have a problem with her cleaning up around him now, but she did it anyway. She couldn't stand to leave the room a wreck when she left. Finished, she walked out and went down the stairs to wait for him. Hopefully today would be a much better day than the one before.

Author's Note: Thank you for all the reviews! They've been lovely!


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

She thought it very possible that this was the least productive day Rumpelstiltskin had ever had in his shop. Not only was he hours late opening due to the morning they'd had she was apparently a horrible distraction. She had tried to help the first hour, seeing all the dust on things after she got there from her apartment after changing into fresh clothes, but he had quashed her good intentions. He had plucked the black and white feather duster out of her hands and told her firmly she was not a maid. That had her rolling her eyes at him and throwing back that the place was a disgrace of un-cleanliness and filth. He had eyed her and promptly tried to dust her, which had her laughing in delight as the feathers brushed her skin and running into the back to try to hide behind the curtain he used as a doorway between the main shop and his office. He had chuckled at that and told her there was a bookshelf hidden inside a closet that would occupy her far better than worrying about the state of his wares.

Intrigued, she had spotted the door and shoved a few boxes and a small chandelier out of the way to get to it. When she managed to pry the door open, and she thought it must have been closed for a very long time with the way it stuck, she let out a sound of happiness. The walls of the large walk in were packed full of books from floor to ceiling. Eyeing the large cupboard she glanced toward the curtain, spotting him walk by as he did something, and felt safe enough to step inside it. These books, unlike the ones at the library, were clearly expensive. They were nearly all bound in leather and were very well taken care of, looking all but untouched. She didn't recognize any of them from the castle and called a question out to him. "Where did you get all these?"

"Online." He called back.

That had her poking her head out of the closet. "You can get books from the computer?"

"Yes, dearie." He answered from the other room.

"How?" She asked. "Does it have to do with the net? I don't understand how it catches things."

There was a brief pause before he snorted out an utterly amused laugh. "What?"

"Ruby said it brings you things. It's really very impressive, but I've never seen the net. Is it like electricity? It's there but you can't see it?"

The curtain came open so he could see her. "Oh love, no." She sent him a baffled look. "It's not an actual net."

"It isn't?" She asked, baffled. "Then how does it get things?"

He tried to make it simple; she saw it in his facial expression. "Think of it like a very large text book. If you look up a word in the back it tells you the definition and gives you an example. In this case when you look something up it brings up every example of it that exists in the Internet."

She took that in. "So… it's a giant encyclopedia?"

"In a manner of speaking." He agreed, still smiling at her misunderstanding. "But I wouldn't trust everything you find on there."

"And you can buy things on it?" This was truly fascinating.

"You can." He agreed. "The curse may keep us here, but it doesn't keep other people out. We still get deliveries from the outside world when we order them, although the people that deliver the items appear to forget they were ever here when they leave. That's why the market is still stocked and the few clothing stores we have contain new wares, but no one new ever moves in or visits." He shrugged. "I ordered most of your clothes from Boston or New York. They have much higher standards than this place."

"How do you put the money in the computer?"

"You use the number on your credit card."

"A what?"

He stepped into the office and pulled his wallet out of his back pocket. As he opened it she walked over to him and he pulled out a thin square of blue plastic. "This."

She took the odd cold card when he handed it to her and she inspected it. She didn't see how this was comparable to real gold, or even the green paper used here. "I don't understand. How is this money? Almost everything here is made of this material. It can't be worth that much."

"The bank keeps track of how much money you have and allows you to give the card to shopkeepers. They run it through a machine that automatically moves the money from your bank account to the account of the person you're paying. The card is used just like money. It's a record of how much you have and you can decide if you want to use it."

"How do you know they aren't taking more than you want to give them?" She asked, seeing how that could go very wrong.

"You have to sign your name on a receipt before the transaction. The paper has the amount you agree to pay. If they take more than that you contact the bank or the police and the merchant will get charged with a crime and your money returned."

"How do you sign your name on a computer?" She asked.

He shook his head. "You ask better questions than most people that have been using credit cards all their lives." He took the card from her and flipped it over. Pointing to a set of small numbers in the center he continued. "On the internet these three numbers are your signature. They're unique to every card."

"Oh." She said with interest. "And what happens if someone steals it from you? Do you loose all your money?"

He hummed in approval of that question. "No, you call your bank and they turn the card off so it can't be used."

"That seems a very impressive invention." She told him, now engrossed with this whole idea.

"As long as you don't overcharge it." He agreed. "Which is a problem many seem to have."

"They spend more than they have?"

"In this world that's really a necessity for most people." He shrugged. "I'll explain that later. We really should get you a credit card, Belle."

"I don't need one."

"You need a proper credit rating if you're set on staying in this world." At her look of confusion he shook his head again as he tucked the card away and put his wallet back in his pocket. He moved to his desk and pulled a drawer open. Pulling out an odd flat silver box he set in on the top of the desk after brushing some oddities to the side to make room for it. Reaching to the center of it he lifted the lid and her eyes went wide in recognition.

"It's a computer?"

"Yes, a laptop." She got closer so she could see as he turned it on. "It works just the same as the one you have in the library except you can carry it around." Interested she sat on the top of the desk as he sat on the chair. She was forcefully reminded of his table back at the castle and liked this. That had always seemed to be the place they were most comfortable with one another, the place they had silently agreed was where they could share, where they had started forming a friendship. He began to type on it quickly, with a speed she envied, and a few moments later was on a bookstore website. He turned the computer so she could see and she cocked her head to the side in interest. "What sort of book would you like?"

She smiled in delight. He was going to show her how this worked and get her a gift at the same time. "_Beauty and the Beast_, please." She said at once.

He blinked at that, no doubt recognizing the title. "_Beauty and the Beast_?"

"It's missing from the library and I can't find that B level storage area even though I searched everywhere and got blueprints for the building. I don't think it exists and is some sort of trick of the magic. I want to read my fairytale. Did you know I had one?"

"Yes." He said slowly. "How did you?"

"Henry told me." She said. "I want to read it." He nodded and typed the name into the search bar at the top. A moment later four different books with that title appeared for them to see. "Are they all different?" She asked as she looked at the images.

"Only the covers. People like options." He looked them over and decided on one that had a very nice cover and a picture on it that looked eerily like her. Beside her was a large, well, beast. She frowned at the sight of it. The creature was very large, covered in thick brown fur, and had horns. It was an odd cross between a wolf, a bear, and a bull. She had never seen anything like it before and was reminded of Grace asking her if Rumple was really covered in fur. She supposed if this was what all the artwork looked like for her story it was a valid enough question.

As the screen changed to one that started asking for payment she couldn't help herself. "Why is the beast hairy? You weren't hairy, only sort of shimmery."

"Shimmery?" He asked dryly.

"Like a dragon's scales." She agreed, having seen one of the great creatures when she was very small. A passing knight had killed one and brought the body back as proof. She had been distraught by the whole thing having never liked killing. The creature had been so lovely as well and it had upset her beyond reason seeing the large gaping hole in it's chest. Her father had been disgusted when he saw the size of it. He had sent the man away with the horse-sized corpse, telling him no real knight killed a nestling with pride. The man, who had been looking for a place to find his footing, had not been pleased with the dismissal from her father's small court, which was neither wealthy nor influential. Clearly, he had thought it an easy place to start making a name for himself and was irked to find otherwise.

Rumpelstiltskin glanced up at her from the computer and sent her the oddest look at her comment. She smiled at him at the expression on his face and continued. "I always thought you looked like a dragon with the way your skin was. And then you hoarded all that treasure around you. I rather thought you must be a real dragon for a few months and could hide it with a spell. I kept waiting for you to change into a full one and burn the place down when you went into a temper."

He chuffed at that and motioned for her to get closer so she could see what he was going to do. "Dragon indeed. Those things are all size and no brains. Come here, I'll show you how to do this."

Instead of stepping next to him she slid onto his lap, which surprised him, but was rapidly becoming her favorite place to sit. "I thought you were a handsome dragon." She continued, as if he hadn't interrupted her. "Your skin would change color in the firelight the way a blackbirds feathers do in the sunlight." He simply watched her at that and she kept on. "And your hair was curly."

"It was." He agreed.

"I liked it." She informed him before pecking him on the lips.

One of his arms slipped around her waist. "Is that so?"

She hummed in agreement and he shook his head a little as he used his other hand to order the book. He explained as he went and she watched him as she settled one of her arms around his shoulder to keep her balance. When he was done he set his other arm around her. "That should be here in a few days."

"Thank you, Rumple." She said cheerfully.

"No matter." He told her. "We do need to go to the bank and get an account set up for you. Pick an evening and we'll go over and take care of it."

"You don't have to come."

"I would prefer to." He told her. "It's a ridiculously complex matter. I want to be sure you get the options that will be best for you, not the bank. I also want to be sure all the questions you have are answered and don't trust the teller to do that."

"You say that like they're evil."

"Not evil, sneaky. Banking is a business and they will try to pick your pocket in every way they can."

"Then why do people use them?"

"Expediency and security." He told her. "The benefits do outweigh the costs most of the time."

"I'll take your word for it." She agreed as she looked over the small computer. "It all seems rather inconvenient to me."

"You'll need to get used to it." He told her. "If you plan on staying here."

"Then I suppose I will." She said easily. "I think I need to learn to use a computer better too. They seem to use them all over and all the schools I looked up recommended that I know how to type." He said nothing to that, although nodded slightly in agreement. Feeling better than she had in weeks, which was no doubt a combination of getting a solid block of sleep and her confessions, she flopped back against him like a cuddly kitten. He grunted a little at the impact, because she certainly wasn't graceful or gentle about it since it wasn't in her nature to be that way, and proceeded to play with the small purple square of silk in his jacket pocket.

"Must you constantly tousle me?" He asked with a false sigh of annoyance.

"Yes." She replied with a small smile. "It drives you mad." He rolled his eyes and she giggled a little. "Besides, I like you tousled."

Batting her hand away he readjusted the handkerchief, tucking it neatly back in his breast pocket. As he did that she flipped his collar up and he huffed at her, knowing she was being intentionally bothersome. "Stop that." She smiled wider and kissed his cheek as she snuck her hand up and ruffled his hair. "Belle!"

She giggled at his gripping and carefully smoothed his hair back down, although she ignored his popped collar. "Rumpelstiltskin?"

"Yes, dearie?" He asked distractedly as he went to work fixing the collar himself with only one hand.

"Is this what you looked like before you had magic?"

He was quiet for a few seconds. "More or less."

"What does that mean?"

"I was thinner." He told her. "My hands were calloused from hard labor." He shrugged a little. "I carried myself differently."

She found she was unable to hold her curiosity any longer. "And your leg? It wasn't like that when I lived with you."

"I was injured a long time ago, when I was a young man. The dark curse healed it. With my magic gone the wound returned."

"Was it an accident?" She asked. "How did you get hurt?"

"War." He said in a clipped tone.

She knew that was the end of the information for now, although with the way he answered it might be the end of it forever. She didn't push him about it knowing that many men that went to war preferred not to speak about what happened. There were some things one learned as a knight's daughter that other ladies simply didn't. Not all men found pride in killing, no matter what the cause. "I imagined you would look different if your curse broke."

He gave her a self-deprecating smile. "Did you think I would turn into a handsome prince?"

She sent him a confused look. "I thought you would still have curly hair." She told him honestly. "I always thought you were handsome."

He snorted. "No need to flatter me." He told her.

"I'm not." She replied. "Well, handsome isn't the right word I suppose." He shook his head. "Attractive." She nodded at that, thinking it was more accurate. "In a horribly dangerous way at first. I also recall thinking you were rather mad for a few weeks while you got used to me being there with you." He shook his head. "But I did quite like the way you looked. Not that I don't now."

"You are a strange creature, dearie." He told her on a sigh.

"You don't think you're handsome." She accused.

"I know I'm not." He said calmly. "It wasn't my looks that drew you to me."

"No, it was your mind that caught my attention." She agreed. "Don't pretend you didn't like me for the same reason." Leaning in she let her lips brush over his as she spoke. "That doesn't mean I don't think you're handsome."

He pressed his lips against hers and she returned the kiss eagerly. Using his good leg he shoved the chair away from the desk and the back of it bumped into the shelf he had stacked with items against the wall behind them, but it gave him enough room to move his arms without slamming his elbows into anything as she twisted her torso enough to face him. His hands began to roam over her body in a nonsensical sweeping pattern and she began to touch him as shyly as she had when they were on the couch, although they were a bit more limited as far as movement went in the cramped corner of his office.

Rumpelstiltskin didn't seem the least bit bothered by that and she wondered if he felt more comfortable here, in his space, because he was certainly touching her more possessively than he had any other time before. Pulling her legs up so they were resting over the arm of the chair she tried to make it easier for him to continue stroking her. The moment her legs were in range he ran one of his hands over them as he slipped his other arm around her to hold her in place. She began to shiver a little as his thumb ran up under the hem of her skirt, her mind returning to what he had made her feel two days before. Just the thought of that had her flushing all over with heat. Wanting to feel that again she kissed him deeply and he returned it, although his hand ran over her skirt instead of under it, creeping up over her hip and back.

Finding the top of her dress he grabbed her zipper and pulled it down slowly. The sound of the metal parting filled the small room and she pressed closer to him as her back was exposed bit by bit to the cool air of the shop. When it reached the end, stopping at the base of her back, his hand slid under the pale violet silk of her parted dress. His warm hand chased the chill away from her skin in its wake and still she shivered. Breaking away from him her breathing came out haltingly and he watched her as he caressed her bare back as she kept her chest pressed against him to keep the dress up as it was clinging precariously to her shoulders.

Rubbing his hand up to her neck he traced two of his fingers lightly down the length of her spine. She sucked in a soft breath as small, warm shocks radiated out through her body from where the tips of his fingers brushed her skin. Arching her back into his touch had him catching her lips again. Sighing into his mouth she reached down and fumbled with the buttons on his jacket, wanting to touch him too. No doubt pleased with her intentions his hand flowed back up toward her shoulder and began to brush the fabric off her.

Making no protest she pressed her lips more urgently against his and let her hands wander up to his shoulders under his jacket. Tearing his mouth from hers he lowered his head a little awkwardly due to the way they were curled up with one another in the old wooden chair and kissed at the skin he had just exposed. She let out a small sigh at the feeling and arched her neck as she shifted in his lap. Kissing her shoulder she felt his lips part, his breath flowing over her skin as he said her name and she began to tug at his tie.

"Gold?" James barked from the front of the shop as the bell over the front door rang loudly.

The call had her jerking her head up she turned toward the sound, beyond startled, and Rumpelstiltskin actually let out a low growl of annoyance. She heard footsteps rapidly approaching and nearly fell off him as she clutched at the front of the dress in order to keep it on. The only thing that saved her from hitting the ground, and possibly her head against the side of the desk, was Rumple's swift reaction. His hands latched around her, hauling her up and steadying her as he snapped at the door. "I'm closed!"

"This is important!" The man snapped. "Henry is hurt! That necklace you gave him isn't working! His arm is burned!"

Reaching behind her she tugged at her zipper as Gold stood up hurriedly. She wondered what the man was talking about as Rumple answered and found that all her lust had vanished in the face of being startled. "Just a moment." He said, although the venom in his voice was gone. He got up, straightening his jacket quickly as she struggled with her own garment. She was too flustered to manage, and why she had thought they would have privacy in his open shop was beyond her. Although she supposed she had thought very little beyond the feelings they managed to bring out in one another. Seeing her struggling, and no doubt blushing like crazy, he stepped in front of her and took over as his hands circled behind her and caught the zipper, bumping her fumbling fingers away.

As he was closing the piece of clothing fully James jerked the curtain aside without Rumpelstiltskin's invitation and caught them in what could only be construed as a compromising position. She blushed harder as Rumple's hands fell away from her and she moved back from him as she pulled her hair hurriedly out from under her collar. The prince froze, took in the scene, and quickly withdrew back into the main shop. "Sorry." She heard as the man cleared his throat in embarrassment.

Rumpelstiltskin looked fit to spit fire at the invasion of what he rightly considered private space and she was mortified. Unable to even look him in the eye she darted a look at the curtain, seeing the other man's shadow as he waited in impatient anxiety, and spoke softly. "I should go."

It only annoyed him more that James had sent her into a full retreat. "There's no need for you to leave."

"I really should." She replied. "I can hardly help anyone the way you can, and if Henry is hurt Regina will be there." It wasn't a secret that the queen's one love in life was the boy. The whole town knew, even she knew and her understanding of the connections people had here was limited at best. She also knew very well she should stay as far away from the other woman as possible. She didn't think she had the self-control necessary to keep herself from attacking her again right now. "I'll only be in the way."

"Dearie-" He started, but she interrupted him with a swift kiss to the cheek.

"You go and help." She finally looked him in the face. "It's good you're helping. Henry's a nice boy." He sighed, but she could tell it was one of agreement. "I'll see you later."

He nodded and she slipped to the back door, weaving between things and sending him a smile over her shoulder. His posture relaxed a little at that and she was about to leave when he called to her. "Wait." She paused with her hand on the doorknob. Moving to the left he picked her jacket off the coat stand where it was hanging next to his and came to her. He held it open for her and she slid her arms in the blue wool. As it settled over her he kissed her behind her ear and she shivered. "You keep forgetting this." He whispered.

"Thank you." She said, a small hitch in her voice.

He kissed her again, one of his hands sliding over her hip, and she only managed to drag herself away from him when James cleared his throat loudly to get their attention. Blushing again she pushed the back door open and left quickly. Rumpelstiltskin caught the door and pulled it closed, his eyes resting on her briefly before turning away toward the prince. She heard him speaking as the door slid shut. "If he's hurt it's nothing to do with the necklace-"

Hoping he would tell her what was going on when she found him later she walked down the three steps between the door and the alley. Dodging around the dumpster she turned around the corner of it sharply, when she crashed into someone.

"I'm sorry." She said at once, and when she looked up was shocked to see someone else she had been working up the nerve to go see. Jefferson was holding onto her arms to steady her, and seemed as shocked to see her in this alley as she was to see him. "Jefferson?"

He let her go at once, as if she had stung him like an angry wasp. "My apologies. You aren't hurt are you?"

She wasn't sure where this attitude was coming from. He seemed… afraid of her. It was nothing at all like the way he had been when he broke her out of the asylum. He had been nothing but calm and focused then. The man in front of her looked a nervous wreck and she wondered briefly if this might be Jefferson's twin she was speaking to. "No."

"Excellent." He said, edging around her carefully. "You have a nice day."

He took off and she changed direction, following him deeper into the alley instead of out to the street and then the library, which had been her original destination. "Wait!" He flinched and kept going, his pace increasing, and she hurried to catch up, her confusion over this odd encounter momentarily overshadowing her good sense to simply go home and not bother strange men in allies. "Please stop!" She cried, catching hold of the back of his jacket. "Please!"

He stopped, mostly because she was getting loud. He looked around like a startled deer expecting a wolf to leap out of the shadows. "Yes?" he asked, a nervous whine in his voice.

She watched him oddly. "Are you all right?"

"Fine, fine." He assured her, his eyes flying about as he tried to brush her hand away from him.

That was rather hard to believe with him acting so strangely. She was rather starting to think he might be the one that needed help at the moment. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to keep you, but I've been wanting to thank you."

"Thank me?" He asked. "Thank me for what?"

She shook her head a little. "For helping me escape the asylum."

All at once he grabbed her, shoving her against the side of the mechanic shop they were next to roughly. His hand went over her mouth and she was just about to scream or kick him when he let out a low shushing noise, shaking his head frantically, clearly far more afraid than she was. "No, no, no." She let out a muffled demand that he interpreted correctly and he cooed oddly, nearly psychotically. "So sorry, my pet, so sorry. Have you told _him_ I was the one to let you out?"

Reaching up she jerked his hand down. "Him who?" She asked. "You mean Rumpelsti-"

He pressed his hand back over her mouth at once. "Don't say it!" He hissed. "He hears his name! He always hears it! You must know that!"

Annoyed, she dragged his hand down again. "If you do that again I will bite you." She told him, sensing no real threat from him despite being pinned against the wall in a questionably traveled alley. At any rate she thought if she screamed loudly enough Rumpelstiltskin would hear her from inside the store. It was after all, only five feet away. And then of course she always had the bracelet. "And no. Why?"

"Don't!"

She was confused. "Why not? You saved my life and I still haven't had a chance to thank you for it."

"You want to thank me? Then don't ever tell him it was me."

She frowned. "Why not?"

He laughed hysterically. "Because I don't need him coming after me the way he came after dear Regina. He set a wraith after her! A bloody wraith!"

"You aren't making any sense." She told him.

"Think, you clever fool!" He hissed, leaning so close she could smell his aftershave. "How do you think he'll react when he finds out I knew you were there all this time and didn't tell him? You think I'll make it long when I kept that from him?"

She processed that quickly. "How long did you know the queen had me?"

He looked cagey then. "I have a daughter to protect. Getting caught in between those two? That's a death sentence."

"You just left me there?" She asked, her stomach rolling sickly.

"Yes, how dare I pick a stranger over my only child. I'm a cruel man." He said angrily, his mood shifting as swiftly as the winds. All at once he was the man that had freed her again. "I'll take your thanks in the form of silence if you'll be so good."

"How do you know him?" She demanded, realizing she had once again been mixed up in some sort of convoluted plot.

"The same way everyone does." He said, his voice lowering as he pressed closer to her. "Now-"

Ten feet away the side door on the auto shop opened and a plain looking man in his thirties with an oil stained blue suit stepped out with a bag of trash in his hand. It was the very same man she had seen with James in the inn yesterday. He saw them at once and barked at the man. "Hey, what do you think you're doing?" Jefferson let her go at once, backing away quickly. The other man hurried forward. "I'm calling the sheriff!" He snapped. "You've no business cornering women in allies!" Jefferson took off and the man hurried to her. "Are you all right, Miss?"

"Yes." She said, looking after the odd man. "Yes, I'm fine. Thank you."

He nodded, watching her with worry as he looked toward where Jefferson had run off too. "Come inside while I call the sheriff."

"There's no need, but thank you. He wasn't going to hurt me."

"That's not what it looked like." The man said.

"I know." She tried to smile at him, but was too distracted to manage. "Thank you, really, but I'm fine."

He didn't seem convinced, but didn't try to stop her as she turned and went the same direction that Jefferson had. The man hadn't answered her question, or any of the questions she had yet to ask him. The library was already closed for the day and Rumpelstiltskin was busy doing something good for once. There was no one to wonder where she was going, and no one to follow her either. If Jefferson wanted to remain her anonymous benefactor he should have thought more carefully when he got her free. He had given her his name when he did it, which seemed foolish if he were this afraid of Rumple.

Turning around the side of the building she caught sight of his dark jacket as he hurried toward a road leading out of the center of town surrounded by the forest. Recalling that Grace had said they lived on Forest Drive kicked her memory awake and she saw the address she had put on the girl's library card in her minds eye. Waiting a few moments to be sure he wouldn't see her following him she headed after him, intent on getting the answers she wanted.

Moving quietly she lingered far enough back that he wouldn't see her, but close enough that she could spot the back of him as she darted from one patch of cover to another. She wanted to be sure he was really going where she thought he was. Sure enough, ten minutes later she was peering around a wrought iron gate at a house even bigger and grander than Rumpelstiltskin's. Finding that odd for a few reasons she frowned and crept forward, looking around with real interest. For all the enormity of the mansion it was rather derelict. The whole place had a beaten down look about it and she wondered why when the rest of Storybrooke was nearly pristine and well kept.

Moving forward she looked up at the house as she avoided the clinging, grasping branches of the overgrown bushes that were growing all over the place, noting it had three floors and guessed it had at least a dozen rooms on each floor. Taking it all in, including one window that was boarded up from the inside and still had shards of glass hanging off it she stepped around the corner toward the front with her eyes directed upwards. No sooner had she taken a step around the large building than she heard a long-suffering sigh right behind her. The hair on the back of her neck stood up as Jefferson's body heat slammed into her back and his large hand settled heavily on her shoulder, squeezing it with enough pressure to almost hurt. "I really wish you hadn't followed me."

Author's Note: Happy New Year everyone! Let's celebrate by reviewing! Yes, that was a totally blatant bit for comments. I'm cool that way.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

A chill ran down her spine as Jefferson's hand tightened further, but she flatly refused to let him see he had unnerved her. Wrenching away from him she whirled around and faced him. "Stop manhandling me. It's not at all polite." She stated firmly as she brushed his hand off her as if it were nothing more than a bit of dust. "I'm not afraid of you either."

He sent her a disgruntled look. "No of course not, that would be beneficial to me." He had switched back to his firm, if flippant, personality. "What do you want from me?"

"To talk to you." She told him. He heaved a sigh and turned toward the front of the house. He shoved his hands in his pockets and left her standing there as she called to him. "I'm not going to leave you alone until you answer my questions."

She thought she heard him mutter a curse under his breath before raising his voice. "I worked that out. So do you want tea or coffee?"

She chased after him. "What?"

"I'm not going to bloody well talk out here where anyone stalking me can hear us am I?" He grumbled. "We might as well be civil about it."

Despite herself she was taking an odd fondness to this melodrama the man was producing. "Do you find it likely more than one woman is stalking you per day?"

He sent her another look over his shoulder that told her he was not amused with her mocking him right now. "I see why he likes you." He told her as she caught up with him. "You're as annoying as he is."

"Rumpelstilt-"

"Not the name!" He growled. "For the love of the gods, it's Gold, just call him Gold."

She supposed she could try to do that if he was going to be cooperative. "Very well." She agreed, although she suspected that part of his magic no longer worked. Still, she wouldn't be telling Jefferson that. "Gold isn't annoying." He snorted at that as they walked up the large front steps of the house toward the front door. As he dug the keys out she decided it would be safe to add something. "And he knows I'm here."

He sent her another look as he unlocked the door. "No he doesn't." With that he opened the door and walked in as it swung open. He didn't bother to close it as she stood on the doormat right outside. "So are you coming in or not?" He called as he vanished into the house.

She rocked on her heels for a moment as she considered how badly this could really go before deciding she had already come this far. Stepping inside after him she took the key out of the knob and held it in her hand as she shut the door behind her, unwilling to get locked in if Jefferson took a dark turn with her. She followed the sound of his footsteps and ended up in a large, if flamboyantly decorated kitchen. The bright neon green of the walls had her squinting as the afternoon sun poured into the large windows that were hung with velvet, purple damask curtains. She felt it hardly helped that the cupboards were bright, summer sky blue and the counter tops an odd black and bright pink marble swirl. She felt as if she had walked into a sensory overload and had not a clue as to how to stop it other than to retreat.

"Coffee or tea?" He asked again.

"Tea I suppose." She answered. After a solid night of sleep she didn't feel the need to drink the highly caffeinated beverage of this world.

He pulled an apple red kettle off the stove and filled it with water before placing it back and turning the burner on. He began to get a tea tray set up and she was actually surprised when she saw the cups and saucers were a flat eggshell white. She never thought she would encounter white cups that clashed with anything, but they hardly seemed to fit in the kitchen, with the obvious exception of how wide and round they were, which in itself set them apart.

Opening the teapot he put some tealeaves in, getting them ready to steep while the water boiled. "Do you like chai tea?"

"I don't know." She answered. "I've never had it, but I like most tea."

He simply went about his preparations, getting some randomly assorted cookies on the tray as he waited for the water. By the time he was done the kettle whistled and he grabbed it easily and poured it over the tealeaves. Setting the kettle back he placed the ceramic top on the teapot and picked the tray up. Without a word he walked to the other side of the kitchen and shouldered a swinging door open. She followed him again and found him setting the tray down on a small table. The parlor was less flashy than the kitchen with a white sofa and fireplace mantel. There was a grand piano on one side, and still the room reeked off oddness. The unusually patterned tan wallpaper somehow clashed and matched the differently patterned tan curtains. She felt the lamps didn't help her perception. If they hadn't been on she would have thought them strange sculptures rather than lights.

She sat down warily on the couch, keeping her back ramrod straight and refusing to lean back on the zigzag black pillows. Jefferson had no qualms about lounging back, all but hurling himself down. As he looked around in a bored fashion she took it to mean he would not be serving her as any man would in a polite situation and instead helped herself. She went ahead and poured him a cup as well and he took it absently when she handed it to him. He sipped at it, his mind clearly elsewhere, and she took a sip of hers. She liked the taste of the odd tea, but refused to relax all the same.

After several minutes of silence he broke it. "Grace will be home from school soon and I don't want you here when she is. What do you want to know?"

She made an effort not to take that personally as she had followed him here without an invitation. "How did you meet Rum-" He sent her a warning look as she accidently started to say his real name. "Gold." She finished.

"I was foolish when I was younger. I have a special talent you see, and I didn't bother to hide it. In fact, I offered it up to the highest bidder."

Which could only be Rumpelstiltskin, a man that could make gold. It was hard to compete with that on a financial level. "What sort of talent?"

"I can jump between worlds with my hat." His face darkened. "At least before it was destroyed."

She must have heard that incorrectly. "You can jump between worlds… with a hat."

He hummed in agreement as he sipped his tea. "Amazing I know, and quite handy for him."

"Handy?"

"Gold was always looking for something, although I never did know what it was. He kept sending me off to find things, people, an octopus once. That was a weird request even from him." He mussed.

She shook her head a little. "Why didn't you-" She broke off the question abruptly. She didn't understand why Jefferson didn't just bring Rumple here, but didn't have enough information to understand. And if Jefferson didn't know it was Rumple that was actually the one that got them all here she didn't want to drop that. She changed the question and he seemed to take it more out of her confusion than panic over betraying Rumpelstiltskin's trust. "You can get to any world?"

"No." He said. "Magic one's only."

That explained that then. "And he went with you to all these worlds?"

Jefferson let out a bark of laughter. "Don't be absurd. He's too smart for that."

"What?" She asked in confusion.

"World jumping is a dangerous business. It has strict rules and it's easy to get lost or stuck. He wouldn't risk his own neck. That's why he hired me to do it." He shrugged. "At least he paid well. That, and I could trust him."

She went still all over. Never once had another person said they trusted Rumpelstiltskin. "You trust him?"

"In business deals." He agreed. "Not when you're involved."

"What do I have to do with anything?" She asked in confusion.

He laughed again, this time really amused. "Oh look at you, pet. So lost still." Standing up abruptly he walked around the room like a caged panther. "Gold was always fair, always kept his bargains to a word. As long as you listen to what he's really saying you can do just fine with him. He liked that I could do that. He never once tried to cheat me. He gave me more payment than I deserved usually. He was a good client. He protected me too once, when I asked and with no strings attached. He also set me up with other notable connections." He sipped at his tea. "And then you came along and upset the balance."

She frowned, watching him as he circled the room. "Upset it how?"

"How the world spun in circles and set him on his head when you came. He was edgy, distracted, lost focus on whatever it was he was doing. He wouldn't let me come to his castle more than twice when you were there and I used to be invited every other week."

"You were there when I was?" She asked, shocked she hadn't known.

"The first time I saw you from the window when you were sweeping snow off the walkway in front of the kitchen." He sat back down on the couch. "When I asked him who you were he ignored me completely. The second time I nearly ran into you when you were cleaning out a room of his thread. I was going there to collect my fee. He grabbed me before I could say anything, came out of nowhere, and took us to his workroom with his magic before you saw me." His attention was suddenly fixated on her. "I knew then. I knew what was happening when I saw his face. He'd never once threatened me before and when I teased him about his pretty new maid he nearly broke my neck, and until then he was quite affable a fellow." He ticked his head at the memory. "That was the last time I was at the castle come to think of it."

She had more questions now than answers, although she had already amassed a few of those. "But I was gone for at least a few years before we came to this world."

Jefferson watched her. "I thought you were clever. Everyone says you are."

That irked her. "You aren't making any sense!"

He sighed, letting his now empty teacup dangle from his finger. "Love has a way of changing a man." He said. "He lost nearly all his interest in harassing people after you died. What little playfulness he had in him was just gone. He buried it right along with you in that fake grave Regina set up. I only heard from him once after that, and at that point I had dropped out of the game. When I turned him down he didn't even try to up his price, just left in a cloud of magic."

"He stopped hurting people?" She asked softly.

He spun the cup around in a circle on his finger. "He had a game or two going from what I heard, but it was nothing like before. He took some sort of odd interest in Snow White and her paramour, although I think that had more to do with harassing Regina than anything." Her stomach tightened, the man really had no idea. "Had I known what she was going to do to me I would have told him you were alive much sooner and let him destroy her."

"Regina threatened you didn't she?" She asked with surety.

"Regina told me she would kill my baby daughter with hot pokers and knives if I let it slip." He said tightly.

She felt sick to her stomach. "You were right to leave me there." She said sincerely, knowing very well her freedom had not been worth that.

His attention returned to her. "I am sorry I didn't help you sooner. I couldn't risk Grace, and once the curse started to weaken it took me some time to work out where she had stashed you here. I was stuck in this house until Emma showed up and started changing things. Regina still doesn't know how you got out either."

"I won't tell her." She promised. "Although I doubt she'll ask." He hummed, his lip curling up, and she had no doubt he had also heard about her assault on the former queen. She sighed at the expression on his face and looked down at her barely touched tea. "I wonder that Rumpelstiltskin hasn't tried to kill her again even if I did tell him not to."

Jefferson had already mentioned knowing about the wraith, although she supposed the whole town did, so it was no secret who had released it and who it was after. Still, the whole town didn't know the circumstances behind it while the hatter had no doubt sussed it out somehow. "You really don't seem to understand your place in all this."

She looked back up at him. "My place?"

"You…" He drew out. "You are the most important person in this town, the most important person in the world."

"Me?" She asked. "I'm not important."

"The most powerful man to ever live loves you, would literally lay the world at your feet for the asking, and you can't understand that you're important. What did that cell do to you?"

She shook her head in denial. "She only took me to hurt him."

"She took you to control him." He said bluntly. "The moment she had worked out how to keep you out of reach and dangle you in front of him at the same time she would have him at her heel. You're the only thing that he ever cared about. He would do literally anything to make you smile. What do you think he would do to keep you safe? To get you back?" She blanched, having never thought of it that way before. How she had never thought of that before she didn't know, but she hadn't. She had simply assumed that eventually Regina would kill her in some horrifically theatrical way to set Rumpelstiltskin over the edge. It had never occurred to her that she would be used as a way to make him dance like a puppet for the dark queen. "Caught up have we?" He asked.

She had, and unfortunately had surpassed him as well. If she could gain such a reaction from the former imp what would Regina do if she found out he had a son here, in this world? What would she do to get to him? What had Rumple risked telling her he had a son? What sort of trust had he offered her with such willingness that she hadn't understood? The only thing he loved more than her was Bae. If Regina found out and tried to use his son, the gods help her and everyone else. Her insides bunched and writhed like battling snakes as the thoughts swirled and she set the cup down on the tray and stood up. "Thank you for the tea, Jefferson." She said distractedly.

He flicked his hand. "Shall I show you out?"

"Thank you, no." She said as she headed toward the door. She set his house key on the piano as she passed. "Tell Grace her book is due back next Tuesday."

"What book?" He asked.

"She's reading _Thumbelina_." She answered as she walked out and headed toward the door without looking back. She left quickly, not even blinking at the odd art in the hallway. Her mind was running circles around itself and all she could think to do was go find Rumpelstiltskin. Her heart was pounding as she left Jefferson's home. None of the things he told her had been what she was expecting. She had avoided going to see him so she wouldn't have to deal with any more information about Rumpelstiltskin and his past. All of it was frightening, if not downright disturbing, and all she had wanted was to focus on the good she knew was in him. She knew there was a decent, loving man in him, and he had been trying so hard to prove her right. She hadn't expected anyone else to be able tell her that Rumpelstiltskin wasn't a monster. She certainly hadn't expected anyone to tell her that she had made a difference in his life, that because of her he had cut drastically back on his dealings, focusing only on those that would help him get himself to this world and his child.

Unable to go home alone after that she walked quickly down the street to his house after seeing his shop was dark and hoping he had gone home after dealing with whatever was going on with Henry. She knew the route by heart and in less time than she imagined she was hurrying up his front steps and onto his large porch. She didn't see any lights on, but that didn't necessarily mean anything, because he wasn't one to want visitors to think they were welcome. However, his car was in the driveway so she thought it a good bet he was here. Lifting her hand she knocked on the door and waited. She felt something brush over her and shivered, identifying the recognition spell by the way it caressed her. This time it felt very much like an affectionate cat rubbing around her ankles, pleased to see her, to let her in. She knew, because he had told her when she asked him more about it, that if one didn't recognize you it would feel more like a sharp blade being pulled over skin. It was no doubt a very effective deterrent for unwanted guests. She could only assume that the screams would alert Rumpelstiltskin as easily as the magic to unwanted guests.

As soon as the spell acknowledged her as an acceptable presence the door opened on it's own. He must have keyed it to do that recently, but at the moment she didn't spare it a thought. She stepped inside as she heard a soft click of another door closing at the back of the house. She strongly suspected he had been coming in from his workroom in the basement. No doubt her timing had been coincidentally serendipitous. As she stepped forward the door closed by the same unseen force it had opened with. "Belle?" He called, worry in his voice. "Dearie, is everything all right?" He stepped into the hall at the other end. "Did you walk here again?" She moved toward him at an odd sort of halting gait. She felt jittery and needy, things she had never approved of and was trying to fight back. However, she felt powerless to keep away from him even though she had come here with only the idea of talking to him about his recklessness in not explaining about his son more fully. She felt as if she were being squeezed from the inside while some sort of invisible tether pulled her to him and she had no will to fight it. There was no possible way to stay away from him right now. Only half able to see her in the shadows of the darkened house with his human eyes he came toward her, able to tell that something wasn't right. "Belle?"

He reached out for her when she was near him, and she saw his face filled with concern for her. Before he could say anything else she was right up against him, cupping his face and kissing him as if she would never get to again, all thoughts of speaking gone in an instant. A strange sound escaped from the back of his throat before his arms wrapped around her tightly. She vaguely heard his cane clatter to the ground as he abandoned it in favor of her, but it was unimportant. All that mattered was that he wasn't letting go or pushing her away. One of his hands tangled into her hair, sending her already loose ribbon fluttering to the ground and her mane of curls falling in every direction. When his fingers found her head he tilted it back to deepened the kiss she shivered.

Unsure of what to do with her hands, or… just unsure what to do, she let her fingers flutter down his neck until she was holding onto his shoulders. Turning them he took a single limping step forward, which had her moving back as they stayed locked together. Somehow he managed to press her up against one of the few walls with a clear space. When she was pinned between it and him he began to run his clever hands over her in the most remarkable ways. His touches were feather light, in direct contrast to the deep drugging kisses he was raining down on her. Her entire body began to quiver as he set every nerve ending in her body on fire in a way she had never experienced and a moan escaped her.

The sound sent a shudder all the way down him and he dragged his lips from hers so he could trail kisses across her jaw and down her neck. Letting out a whimper her body arched into his all on it's own and he flattened his hands over her hips to hold her in place as he forcibly pulled his face away from her. "Belle?" She pressed forward and kissed him again, derailing whatever he had been going to say for a long, wonderful minute. Rumpelstiltskin had never been good at letting her go, and even worse at letting opportunities pass. When she added in the abruptness of her appearance and his very willing capture it was amazing he managed to pull away a second time. He only managed because he put one hand on her cheek and brushed her hair back as he did it, holding her away as gently as he could. "You need to tell me why you're here." He breathed raggedly.

She didn't know why she was here. Whatever her original reason was it was gone, if it were even a real reason to begin with. There had been no plan on her part, other than to see him, to assure herself he was still here, and whole, and safe from what she might accidently do to him. She hadn't even thought she was going to kiss him until she saw him. Her only motivation was to see him, to not be alone, to assure him that she was still here no matter that he knew she was alive again. She answered him as honestly as she could. "I wanted to see you." There was more to say. Really, there was, but right now, at this moment, she didn't want to talk about anything. She was so very tired of talking. He let out a ragged breath and bent into her, pressing his face into her hair. Suddenly, she felt as if she had erred, broken some rule she hadn't known was in place. "Is-is that okay?"

"Yes." He said, clearing his throat as he lifted his head so he could see her. He stroked her face and smiled at her. "Of course it's okay." He kissed her forehead. "You surprised me, that's all." She saw him begin to retreat and pull his emotions back under his mask, and no sooner did he do that then he began to push away from her, his hands leaving her as he eased away, giving her room he thought she wanted.

An odd sort of panic, if that's what to call it, raced over her and she caught him, pulling him back to her. She pulled a little too hard in her haste and he caught himself against the wall, the hand that had so recently been a warm weight on her hip splaying out against the wall to keep him steady in absence of his cane. "Don't." She whispered, her voice shaking a little. All at once she knew why she was here, as if it hadn't been obvious, as if there was another reason they had been dancing around each other for so long now. This wasn't the way it was supposed to be. They weren't married. The only thing she knew about this were the secret forbidden tidbits she had stumbled on when she read, because this was no subject for a lady to know about and one that had never even been mentioned in her presence. But nothing was how it used to be and she had long ago determined to decide her own fate. This was what she wanted. He was what she wanted. "Don't go."

His breathing changed, but otherwise she couldn't tell what he was thinking as they stood against one another in the shadows. He was searching her face and she rubbed her hand over his shoulder, wondering where his jacket and tie had gone. It wasn't like him to be in only his shirt. She was sure now she had interrupted something, some sort of magical experiment. "Belle-"

She cut him off before he could escape her, before he could hide away from her and what he wanted, before he could push her away anymore. "Let's be brave." She whispered. He went still all over and she caught hold of her courage and shifted so they were pressed up against each other again. Lifting her head she kissed him a little shakily. "Be brave with me." She murmured against his lips.

He kissed her with more passion than she had thought was possible, reaching up to cup her face. Her hands tightened back over his shoulders and he slowly broke away from her, coming back to kiss her over and over until her head was spinning and she had all but melted against him. One of his hands dropped away and he flicked his fingers, having his cane leap back up into it with a neat little spell. He kissed her again before drawing her back away from the wall with him. His eyes were locked on hers and when she followed after him willingly, if not eagerly, he appeared to gain some measure of confidence. He took her hand with his free one and began to lead her toward the stairs.

She followed him and saw she wasn't the only one that was breathless as they walked up to his bedroom. Butterflies were fluttering in her stomach, challenging her resolve as well as the heat running through her. His thumb ran over her knuckles, chasing some of her nerves away, and when he took her into his bedroom and shut the door behind them she moved in front of him with a kind of shy hesitance. His hands settled on her at once, drawing her back against him as he kissed her.

Pressing closer to him she broke the kiss and reached up to unbutton his shirt. She felt herself blushing badly but refused to back down now that she'd made her mind up. Besides, knowing him the moment she did he would go into full retreated and she'd be lucky to see him again inside a month. He would no doubt take it as a rejection of him as opposed to nervousness on her part even if he had to know he was the only one in this room with experience in these matters.

Catching her hands he stilled them, holding them against his chest as she got the second button loose. "Belle, are you sure this is what you want?" He was trembling slightly as he asked.

"Hush." She ordered firmly, although there was a little hitch in her voice. "I'm being brave and you're trying to derail me."

Despite all the emotions and lust he smiled softly at her, his eyes full of warm affection. "Hardly." He told her as he began to draw her backwards toward the bed, pressing his lips against her knuckles as he went. "I've never once managed that at any rate. I doubt I could start doing so now." One of his hands went to her back and splayed out as he pressed her closer against him. She kissed him and he ran his hands over her, mapping her out over her clothes, having her breath catch in her chest and her whole body feel overheated and needy.

He stepped backward carefully and sat on the edge of the bed, pulling her down after him. She managed to straddle him as they settled and he kissed her again, the position putting them at the same height. He really wasn't that much taller than her, although with the power that radiated out of him, with the way he held himself, he always seemed so much taller than he really was. His hands caressed down her back and she went back to conquering his buttons as she shook her heels off her feet. They plunked to the floor with soft thuds that they both ignored. He broke the kiss and she took the opportunity to look down to see what she was doing. He nuzzled his face into her hair, breathing her in deeply, and she finished her task. He had another thin white shirt on underneath and she couldn't help but wonder how many layers of clothes he wore on a regular basis.

As she thought that he pulled her zipper down for the second time that day. She shifted closer, wiggling until she was right up against him, and he let out a groan as he got hard between her legs. An unexpected thrill raced up her at that and she got bolder, shoving at his dress shirt to get it off him. He tried to help her, but must have been fairly distracted, because their progress was suddenly halted when he got caught in it by the cuffs. He cursed and she giggled despite the seriousness of this act, despite what it meant to both of them. He growled and began to yank at the cuff links and she caught him before he could rip anything. When she carefully separated them he tried to hide a sheepish look, which really only endeared him to her more.

"Is any other part of your wardrobe going to try to sabotage us?" She asked good-naturedly as she set the small pieces of metal inside the pocket of the shirt so they wouldn't be lost.

"I'll set it on fire if it does." He told her with such conviction she laughed again before kissing him firmly on the mouth.

"No fire." She said when she pulled away. "Or lightning." She added as she finally got the shirt fully off him. "Or unexpected bangs, explosions, or other magical nonsense." Letting the shirt drop to the ground she cupped his face and met his eyes seriously. "Just you, Rumpelstiltskin."

His eyes darkened noticeably at the gentle command and spoke softly. "I'm no one without magic."

She rubbed her thumb over his skin, now ever so slightly scratchy with stubble. "You're Rumpelstiltskin without your magic." She told him. "The man I see all the time no matter what you look like. That's who I want." Something, some stark emotion flickered over his face for an instant before he leaned forward between the few inches separating them and kissed her gently. It was different than the other kisses, warmer somehow, and full of love. She returned it at once, hoping it reassured him that it was him she really wanted, not the magic imp that he tried to hide himself beneath in a desperate attempt to keep himself safe. When he finally pulled back she breathed out more. "I love _you_."

His lips pressed hard over hers at that and he twisted them, somehow holding her tight against him as he surged up the bed. A moment later and he was laying her carefully over the thick comforter. She sank down into it, pulling him over her as she did. He settled half on top of her and found her lips again, stroking his hand down the length of her several times before his fingers came up and curled over the shoulder of her dress and moved it slowly down her arm, slow enough that she could stop him if she wanted. But she hadn't come here to stop anything. Shifting a little had him pausing briefly until he realized she was moving to help him remove it.

He kissed her again before propping himself up on his arm and slipped the fabric down her shoulders and arms. She wiggled a little to get free and he darted a glance at her before tugging the fabric over her hips and down her legs. As she pulled her legs out of the skirt he kissed the exposed skin of her stomach. She shivered a little as he shifted back up beside her, his fingertips running over her skin after tossing the dress over the edge of the bed. He took her in slowly, absorbing the sight of her in nothing but her dusty rose-colored panty set. She squirmed at the intensity of it, blushing as he saw far more of her than anyone else ever had.

He watched in obvious fascination as the flush flowed from her face and down her neck until it stopped just above her chest. Putting his arm around her he held her warmly against him as he kissed her again. "Beautiful." He told her between kisses. "You're so beautiful." Emboldened further she reached down and tugged at his white shirt. He broke away from her reluctantly to pull it over his head with one hand and tossed it away carelessly. Unable to help herself she reached out for him and drew him back down, twisting a little so she could press herself against his warmth.

Rumpelstiltskin welcomed the contact, adjusting so she was comfortable as he began to map out her newly exposed skin with his hands and lips, sending trails of heat down to her core and causing her to pant lightly. Hearing the change in her breathing he shifted down the bed a little, his hand rubbing from behind her shoulder to her back, stopping at the back of her bra. Pressing his head to the top of her chest he kissed her over the gossamer lace and she caught her breath as his fingers fumbled with the fastening. She buried her own fingers into his hair to hold him against her, her body heating up as he nuzzled at her increasingly sensitive breasts. Growling in lustful frustration he tugged at the garment insistently until it finally gave way.

Clearly having lost most of his composure he removed the garment from her quickly and she let him go long enough for him to pull the straps off her arms. His eyes were nearly black with want and he pressed down and kissed her neck, just below her jaw, forcing her to tilt her head up to accommodate him. As she gasped at the sensation he cupped one of her breasts and squeezed it gently. Letting out a strangled whimper at the feeling she pressed up into him enthusiastically. He nipped at the soft skin of her throat in response and ran his thumb over her nipple in a way that had her squirming. His hand slid away from her chest and ran over her side and down to her hip. Holding her hip firmly he shifted her to her back and then moved his fingers between her legs.

Now knowing what he was going to do she caught her breath and twisted her head so she could kiss him. He returned it at once as he began to stroke her slowly over the barely there lace. Whimpering into his mouth she shifted restlessly as he touched her, her mind shutting down utterly as the pleasure slowly built up. As she alternately pressed into him and shifted her hips to escape the ever-growing sensation Rumple nuzzled at her upper jaw and began to suck on her earlobe. A high-pitched whimper escaped her and he surprised her again by sliding his hand under her panties and running his hand delicately over her folds. She nearly came off the bed at the feeling and blushed furiously when she felt him spreading her wetness over her.

Rumple, on the other hand, only got more excited. His breathing was becoming labored and he kissed her hotly as he twisted his wrist and slipped one of his fingers inside of her. Gasping, she broke away and he pumped his hand slowly inside of her, keeping his thumb pressed firmly against her center. One of her legs crooked up as she tilted her hips up and he slid a second finger inside her. The added sensation of stretching had her whole body going rigid and he kissed her again, hard, as he crooked his fingers up and hit something inside of her that had her ripping apart at the seams. Crying out softly she went stiff all over and he held her as still as he could as he continued to rub the soft spot. Head rushing and body singing she finally couldn't take anymore and her body gave out. He kissed her as she slumped into the mattress gasping erratically.

As she lay there spinning and flushed in the afterglow he hooked his fingers around her panties and peeled them off her. Lifting her hips to help as best she could she forced her heavy limbs to move and reached down for his belt. Pushing her clumsy hands away gently he toed off his shoes before getting out of the rest of his clothes himself. Too flushed from pleasure to blush any more she managed to take him in briefly in the darkened room before he was lying back down beside her. Laying half over her he began to kiss her again, clearly trying to control himself, and she lifted her hands to run them over his chest, and then around to his back.

Groaning as she took her turn exploring him she felt him rigid against her hip as he pressed against her in an effort to relieve himself a little. When one of her hands slid down to the hallow of his lower back he said her name nearly pleadingly. "Belle." She kissed him again and rubbed herself against him, too shy to say anything, but trying to get it across that she wanted this as much as he did. "Say yes." He insisted raggedly.

"Yes." She breathed quietly, her voice quavering ever so slightly. "Yes, Rumple."

His whole body tightened and he shifted all the way over her. Using his good knee he pushed her legs apart and she complied at once when she realized what he wanted. Dipping his head down he kissed her again as he settled himself over her, balancing on one arm. Reaching down between them he positioned himself and murmured against her lips. "I love you." Before she could say anything he thrust into her swiftly and she let out a cry at the nasty sting that ripped through her. He grabbed her hip and held her firmly so she couldn't move. "I'm sorry." He said sincerely, his voice choked and strained. "I'm so sorry, love." She quivered below him, past uncomfortable and trying to get away from the pain despite his hold.

"It hurts." She choked out, thinking it was incredibly unfair that this of all things should be painful. That this had driven the good feelings that had so recently flowed through her away.

He let out a sound of labored discontent as she gripped hard at his upper arms. All at once a cool wave left the hand on his hip and seeped into her, washing the pain away as if it had never existed. She relaxed in a rush and he let her hip go and slid his other arm up beside her. He set his forehead against hers as his hands slid under her arms, his fingers curling over her shoulders. "Okay?" He asked raggedly.

"Yes." She agreed with grateful breathlessness. She may have said no magic, but for the life of her she couldn't be bothered by him using it at the moment. And now that the pain was gone all she could feel was the marvelous stretch, the feeling of fullness. Her toes curled at he feeling and her legs slid up cradle his hips. Letting out a groan he began to move against her with slow, certain thrusts. Her hands tightened back around his arms and small mewls began to escape her as he pressed her hips firmly into the mattress over and over again. Her whole body was quivering at the odd and wonderful pressure, her mind trying to grab at what was happening but unable to categorize it. The soft sound of him moving inside her, the heat they were creating, the feel of his skin on her, and the comforting smell of him and some other sharp tang in the air were all too much. There was no way to think. All she could do was hold onto him and feel, and it was overwhelming.

Murmuring her name he captured her lips and she felt herself spiraling up to the precipice again. "Rumple." She cried as he suddenly twisted his hips, jolting the small bundle of nerves between her legs. In response he did it again, and then again, and she began to writhe under him in desperation.

"Yes, Belle." He hissed, his hands griping her tighter. "Give in." Unable to do anything else her hips clamped hard against his and she cried out as her nails dug into his skin. She called out loudly, completely loosing herself in him as wave after wave of white-hot pleasure crashed through her. Above her Rumpelstiltskin let out his own muffled shout of release and jerked all over, pressing flat against her. Both of them were stiff for what felt like forever, straining against one another as they shared the pleasure of the act. Finally, he went limp, collapsing over her in exhausted completion, driving her deeper into the soft blankets.

Clutching at him as she panted he lay over her. He held her loosely as they lay there and she found she liked the warm weight of him over her. Turning her head she buried it in his neck and he shifted to the side sluggishly and began to stroke her hair with a slightly trembling hand as he regained himself. He turned, pulling her with him so they were on their sides facing one another. Reaching over he pulled the sheet over them to keep them warm in the cool room as they settled, their breathing ragged and uneven.

She lay quietly next to him, recapture her senses as he rubbed slow, flowing circles along her back over the sheet. She thought the covering was as much for his modesty as hers, but didn't mind. She was feeling shy now, terribly so. Once the passion had passed, and the pleasure was waning down so she could think, well, she supposed she was glad for the sheet. Her hands were resting against his chest, having slid off his shoulders in the move, and he was watching her silently. She felt no urge to speak, even with him so focused on her, and lifted her hand and caressed his jaw gently.

His eyes fluttered closed at the feeling and he let out a low breath at the touch. Marveling at the sight of him so… so tame, she kept caressing him. His skin was warm and a sweat slicked, although she supposed she was in much the same state. She hadn't thought it would be so very hot an activity, although she honestly hadn't noticed until it was over and they were both gasping desperately for breath as she clung to him. Moving her hand up a little she straightened his hair with careful fingers. It had gotten rather mussed and he was once again disheveled in front of her. Slowly, his dark eyes opened again, catching her gaze and stilling her hand. It was no wonder, no wonder he could wield magic so easily when all he had to do was look at a person to trap them so completely. It hardly matter that he had human eyes instead of those of a dragon now. His stare had the same power regardless.

Moving his hand down to her lower back he used it to pull her closer to him. She blushed lightly when her bare body pressed all the way along his but made no move to escape him. He kept his eyes on hers and finally she couldn't stand it anymore and looked away. Leaning his head down he captured her lips with his in a gentle kiss and she melted into him. When he pulled away he kissed her damp forehead affectionately. Relaxing fully she snuggled closer to him and he let his arm rest over her waist as he tucked her head under his chin contentedly.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

Rumpelstiltskin pulled the car up beside the library and she smiled at him, pleased she didn't end up walking home even if he hadn't let her drive this morning. "Thank you for dropping me off."

He glanced at the building briefly before returning his attention to her. "Let's go back home."

She sent him an amused glance. "No, Rumple. We've already argued about this. I'm not leaving the library closed again today. I'm going to get dismissed from my position."

"Who's going to fire you?" He asked.

"The city counsel." She answered, having sussed out that they ran all the public services on her own.

"They can't fire you." He told her. "I'm the one that owns the library."

She sent him an exasperated look. "What?"

"I hope that eases your mind." He said, going shrewd as he let his foot off the brake and the car began to roll away from the curb slowly. "Now, we can-"

"Rumpelstiltskin, don't you dare turn into a brat. Stop this car."

He grumbled and stopped, putting it in park. Shaking her head she leaned over and turned his face to hers. When he was facing her she kissed him warmly and he sighed into her mouth happily, his hands sneaking to her hips. Sensing where this was going, and not wanting anyone else to catch them out in the middle of the street, she broke away, more than willing to compromise on this. "I'll come to the shop at three when I close."

"Very well." He agreed reluctantly.

Smiling at him she kissed him again. "I'll see you soon."

"You could bring some clothes with you." He suggested, looking the picture of innocence. "In case you'd like to stay again tonight. Tomorrow is Sunday. We could sleep in." She hummed at him the way she always did when she was either amused or disbelieving of what he said and opened the car door. She saw him trying to hide a smile as she unbuckled her seatbelt and got out. She was about to shut the door when he called to her. "Belle." Bending a little she looked back in, her hair swinging from the move. Whatever he was about to say died on his lips as she looked at him expectantly. He cleared his throat and tried again. "I enjoyed last night."

"You enjoyed it?" She asked with skepticism.

He realized that hadn't come out right. "I mean, I had a good time."

"A good time." She repeated blandly, more amused with him actually having trouble finding the words he actually wanted than annoyed with the way everything was coming out. Who knew Rumpelstiltskin could ever become tongue-tied?

Frustration flashed over his face as he continued to stumble. "I'm glad you were there."

"It would have been a bit of a different situation for you if you had been by yourself." She agreed with a straight face.

He rolled his eyes in exasperation. "Are you enjoying yourself?" He asked, working out she was teasing him rather mercilessly.

She watched him with false seriousness, trying to fight her smile back despite the ruse being up. "Hopefully in a different way than you did last night… and this morning." She finished with the slightest blush.

He chuffed and she laughed softly, her good humor outweighing her modesty. "That isn't what I meant." He started. "I meant-"

"Rumple?" She interrupted, wanting to allow him to stop digging himself a hole. This was endearing him to her more than she could say, but he was clearly annoyed by it. He watched her with the slightest hint of apprehension. "I love you."

His shoulders relaxed. "And I love you."

Her expression softened. "I have to go to work now so you can't fire me." She informed him matter-of-factly. "And before that I need to clean up so I'm presentable." She grabbed the side of the car and leaned back in. He leaned toward her and she pecked him on the lips briefly. "So I'll see you later."

He reluctantly let her escape, although he did it gracefully all the same. She did love that about him, his politeness and respect where she was involved. Gaston had always been so lacking in that. She had thought, so long ago now, that perhaps she could have taught him the way a lord should act given time, but had known it would be an uphill battle with a man like him. Rumpelstiltskin had a natural grace about him that so many rougher men lacked. He was graceful in both his movement and manner. Perhaps she just admired it so because she was a bit of a clumsy terror herself, although she had always been conscious of her comportment as her mother had taught her the importance of it, and lessons her mother taught her were slow to loose their meaning. "Goodbye, Belle. Have a good day."

"You too." She said with a smile as she straightened up and closed the door. She waved at him as she walked to the side door and unlocked it, slipping inside as he watched to be sure she made it in without trouble. Considering the way trouble seemed to find her she appreciated it. Hurrying up to her door she went into her apartment for the first time in several days and headed to the bathroom, noting the small amount of dust starting to collect on things as she did and wondering how it got in here when the pace was shut up so well.

Turning on the taps she kicked off her shoes and began to shimmy out of her horribly wrinkled clothes, relieved that no one had seen her in such a state except Rumple, who was responsible for the way they looked as much as she was. She was far also far less alarmed by the small spattering of bruises that dotted her hips and inner thighs than Rumple had been when he saw them this morning. Brushing her hand over them briefly she let out a little sigh, thinking maybe it would have been alright to allow him to heal the places despite the effort it would have taken on his part.

Shrugging to herself she let it go and tugged her hair down out of the bun it was in before slipping into the rapidly filling tub. The hot water covered her legs as she settled and she let out a small sigh of gratefulness. She had cleaned up briefly last night, but this was infinitely better. While she felt more relaxed right now than she had in years, she was sore in places she had rarely given any thought to and the hot water certainly helped everything relax. Leaning back she let the water cover her and hoped it would sooth the ache away for good. Rumple had gotten rid of the initial pain, but using muscles that had never been used before had developed their own sort of ache that she had neglected to mention. He had been so bothered by the bruises she figured it was better left unsaid, and it wasn't particularly painful, only slightly uncomfortable. Knowing she had at least a full hour before she had to be downstairs she allowed herself to close her eyes and let her mind wander back over the last day as the water eased everything else away.

She wasn't sure how long she lay there dozing quietly against him after they broke apart as he ran his fingers through her tousled hair, sending small sparks of pleasure down her neck and back. However, she was in no hurry to get up, let alone stop cuddling with him in his bed, so didn't worry about it. Rumpelstiltskin was as interested in getting up as she was and the comfortable silence stretched out between them. She thought it quite possible they would have laid there for the remainder of the afternoon if she hadn't shifted a little and looked up at him from under her lashes shyly. Apparently the look couldn't be left alone and the man bent his head and kissed her lovingly.

Heat tore through her so fast and hard she had no idea how she had been near to sleep not a moment ago. She pressed against him in a rush and he let out a low sound of approval as he rolled her to her back at once. No longer nervous or apprehensive about this, since she knew what was happening and very much enjoyed the last time, she wrapped her legs around his hips at once, although she hadn't done that before. Still, it seemed like the right thing and when he let out a low growl of approval against her mouth she knew she was right about that.

One of his hands twisted down to grab her hip and then he was pressing back inside her. Her back arched as he settled fully inside her and she let out a small brathy moan of approval.

He kissed at her jaw as she stretched her back all the way out and she reached down and put her hands on his hips, although she was unsure if she were trying to pull him closer or push him away as the feeling of fullness overwhelmed her. She didn't get a chance to make up her mind before he was rocking against her and she did her best to match the rhythm of his hips. He kissed her, slowing down as he realized what she was doing, giving her time to work this out the way she wanted to. He watched her face avidly, brushing her hair out of her face between deep kisses.

She quivered as he pressed fully inside her, her hand tightening as she squeezed her legs to keep him inside her. He groaned and pressed forward so he was flat against her. She let out a sharp breath and he kissed her harder. This pace, it was so different from the last time, something she hadn't expected, and she wondered how many ways this could happen. Her hands slid up so she could clutch at his back, now assured that he wasn't about to go anywhere, and her fingers splayed out over his shoulders. Twisting his head he began to kiss his way hotly down her neck, his back arching to allow him to taste her.

Her breathing began to come out in sharp, mewling pants as he focused fully on her. It was overwhelming, having him so centered on her, on this, and she began to spiral up again, the pressure beginning to overwhelm her. She held him tighter, her fingers digging into his skin as she squeezed her eyes tightly shut, her head coming up so it was buried in his shoulder. "Rumple." She whined, her legs now fully locked around him. He began to move faster and she let out another cry. "Please!" He grunted with effort, pressing her harder into the mattress, and all at once her body imploded again. Crying out his name she held him tightly, her whole body going rigid, and he thrust into her two more times before losing himself in her completely. They pressed against one another desperately for what felt like an eternity before her head began to clear a little.

Catching her breath she stroked her hand over his upper back, mapping out his lean frame languidly as her head spun. Rumple shifted his hips and slid out of her as he wrapped his arms under her and hugged her to him as he turned back over on his side. Warm affection suffused her and she cuddled close, which wasn't hard when he was holding her the way he was. Leaning forward half an inch she kissed him and he let out a soft sigh of satisfaction. Pulling back a little he watched her with dark, deep eyes. "Hey." He said softly, his usual greeting having a strange new inflection.

She blushed all over again and she wondered if she was ever going to stop or if her skin would be forever tinged pink. "Hi." She whispered back bashfully. Smiling affectionately, he reached up and pushed her hair back out of her face. Unsure of what else to say she watched him silently, knowing she would be more comfortable with him taking the lead this time even if he had already been guiding them since she followed him into his bed. No doubt sensing her nervousness, he tucked her curls back one at a time, his long fingers toying with her hair the same way they did with his gold thread as he allowed her to acclimate to being here with him.

Finally, he broke the silence. "You're so lovely." Shaking her head she buried it back under his chin, embarrassed but flattered by his sincere perception of her. He hummed at her, cradling her against him. "I don't deserve you."

"Yes you do." She said into his skin. "Stop being stubborn about it. You drive me mad and then I'm forced to argue with you. We should stop all this silliness and get along. It's much more fun getting along." Because really, she couldn't think of anything that could be better than this.

He sighed into her hair where he had his nose buried, but she could feel his smile. "I can't disagree with you." He told her.

"Good. Now behave." She murmured, hoping this was finally settled. "You're so warm."

He kissed her head again and pulled the blanket tighter around them, being sure she was cozy. "Anything to get out of being cold." He teased gently. She had never done well in the cold, not after growing up in the marshes, one of the warmest areas in their old land. She had near to frozen to death in his castle that first night he kept her in the dungeon, although she had felt the noticeable increase in temperature about seven hours after he shoved her in there. He must have been watching her somehow and seen her huddled, shivering and miserable in the thin gold gown. She was also suspicious he had later enchanted her blankets in her room to stay warm, as she never once got cold when she slept no matter how much the temperature dropped outside that winter.

"I don't like it." She agreed, pushing all the thoughts about Regina's tower away for the moment since she had rarely been warm there. At least in the asylum, despite everything else, she had been given thick enough clothes to stay warm even in the chilliest New England winter. After their fight the only thing she had taken with her, other than the clothes she had been wearing, was one of his soft jackets. She just hadn't wanted to end up somewhere she didn't know and freeze to death.

"It's already heading toward fall." He said. "We need to get you a coat before it gets much cooler out. This place is easily as cold as my castle was in the mountains in the winter."

She shivered at the thought even as she thought it was sweet he was worried about that right at this moment. "You couldn't have had the curse send us somewhere warm? That was terribly short sighted of you." He snorted at that and she giggled into his neck. His hand rubbed over her back until it settled on her neck and began to knead it gently. Having loved that since the first time he did it she sighed happily. Shifting a little she nuzzled at his warm skin with her nose and he hummed as she hit a soft spot, no doubt tickling him. She noted that he was ticklish, thinking she could have some fun with that later on when she was feeling less relaxed and more playful. "You seem happy." She murmured softly, lulled back to relaxation by the massage.

"More than you know, dearest." He said, slightly strained, although he was trying to cover it up.

She closed her eyes and slid her arm back over his waist. "I used to think about this." She told him quietly, knowing on some level he needed to hear that.

"So did I." He told her, his hand stroking down her back again.

"Was it like this?" She asked.

"No." He answered.

"What was it like?" She asked curiously.

"Not like this." He said enigmatically. She said nothing to that, mulling it over and wondering if that was a good or bad thing. For once he couldn't seem to stand her lack of prying into his thought process. "This is better." He said at last, rubbing her gently. "This is real."

Her heart melted at that. Lifting her head up she kissed him and he returned it languidly. Heat filled her, but this time it was tempered by satisfaction. She was more than happy to lay there with him as small tingles ran up and down her spine for now. His hand shifted to her face and he cupped it gently. Feeling less shy than earlier she touched him with little hesitation. As her fingers ran over him she paused at his shoulders, feeling something odd. Breaking out of the kiss she shifted up on her elbow and looked over his arm as she pushed the blanket away. Spotting a number of small crescent markings she frowned, realizing she had scratched him. "I hurt you." She said unhappily.

He drew her back down beside him with little concern. "Don't fret over it." He said easily. "I rather enjoyed getting those battle scars."

She flushed again and he chuckled at her discomfort. She tried to come up with something to say. "I-" Her stomach growled, interrupting whatever she was trying to come up with before an idea could really form. Beside her he huffed out a soft laugh and kissed her forehead. She cringed, embarrassed that her stomach had betrayed the gentle and relaxed mood, and he rubbed at her back briefly.

"I suppose it was unrealistic to think we could lay her forever." He said as he twisted around under the comforter so he could reach the floor. "Let's get you something to eat, dearest. The bed won't go anywhere."

While she was hungry she would trade it for staying here, because with her luck the house would be cursed and they would never get in here again in the time they took to have a meal. Her luck seemed to run that way. They should probably stay in here forever just to prevent that sort of catastrophe. "I'm fine."

He grabbed his pants and shirt up before kissing her gently. "You said that this morning. Did you eat lunch, or skip that too?"

"I had a cup of tea." She answered honestly, well almost a whole cup, a few sips at least. Truthfully, she hadn't had anything to eat since breakfast the day before. A great many things had happened since then which were far more important than meal times.

He raised an eyebrow, clearly disapproving. "I think we can do better than that. I don't like you skipping meals. You've gotten far too used to it and it isn't at all good for you." He kissed her again. "Come on now."

Hoping they would end up back here after they ate, as he seemed set on getting her stomach full despite her preference for staying here, she glanced around for her dress. Sitting up she saw that it was crumpled on the floor at the end of the bed and sat up, holding the sheet around herself in an effort to maintain some sort of modesty, although it seemed a silly thing to worry about at this point. As she contemplated if she could pull the sheet with her as she got up to get the dress without pulling everything else off the bed Rumpelstiltskin turned his back to her as he pulled his trousers on. She found she wasn't good enough to avert her own eyes from him despite her own hiding. Taking in his slim frame in the shadowed room she felt her blood start to pump a little faster and shook herself, feeling as if she were going mad with lustful compulsions. She felt it hardly helped that she knew he would eagerly allow her to indulge in those compulsions if she gave even a hint of that desire. And for some reason the sight of the small scratches on his shoulders where she had marked him were only making those feelings stronger even though she was sure that must have stung him.

Luckily, she turned her attention back to the crumpled dress just as he turned back around to grab his shirt, no doubt saving herself from teasing. He caught her contemplating the dress, which was wrinkled beyond help at this point, and went to his closet without bothering to button the shirt up. He grabbed a clean, pressed navy blue shirt off a hanger and held it out to her. She took it with a shy smile as her hands brushed over the soft linen. "Thank you."

He smiled at her and grabbed his cane. She noticed he was hardly putting any weight on his leg at all now and hoped he was all right as she slipped the shirt on quickly. As she was buttoning it up she shifted toward the edge of the bed and glanced down, feeling an odd slickness between her thighs as she put her feet on the ground. Finding it slightly uncomfortable she pushed the sheet off her and went still at the sight. Her thighs had blood smeared between them and the sheets weren't in much better shape. "Oh." She said in strangled voice before she could think to be quiet about it.

He glanced over and saw what was going on in the blink of an eye. Rumpelstiltskin didn't react the same way she did at all. Stepping to her he held his hand out and she took it. He pulled her up after his fingers wrapped over hers and he tugged her up. Kissing her cheek he led her out of the room, flicking his wrist sharply as they went. Behind them the bedding began to shake itself out and she jumped in surprise at the unexpected noise. Turning her head she saw it was folding itself up neatly and that the red sheets had been exchanged with forest green ones in the time it took her to blink. Rumple didn't pause as he pulled her out of the bedroom and he headed straight to the washroom, with her trailing him clumsily as she was distracted by the magical bed making, which would have been markedly helpful the last time she had stayed in a home with him. When they got there he leaned in and kissed her cheek. "Let's get you cleaned up. This won't happen again."

Now sure her cheeks were stained permanently pink she nodded in understanding. Knowing about what was supposed to happen really wasn't the same as having it happen to yourself and she was trying to get a handle on what they had done. Everything felt different now, and oddly much the same, and she wasn't sure what was really going on in her head. He was helping her make this normal by his calm reactions to all of this and she pulled herself back together as he found a cloth and turned the water on warm in the sink. Taking it from him she spoke, feeling as if this were a little too much to have him see no matter what they had gotten up to together. "Maybe I could meet you downstairs in a minute?" She rather thought it would be easier to deal with this herself than have him help, since that seemed to be far more embarrassing than need be.

He accepted that easily and nodded. Smiling bashfully she kissed him briefly and he tickled her cheek before leaving the bathroom, pulling the door closed behind him to give her some additional privacy. When she heard him walk away she used the soft cloth and carefully cleaned herself off, finding the inside of her legs were tender. Once she was clean she put the now soiled cloth in his laundry hamper and saw the sheets were already tucked inside. Shaking her head in bemusement she set the cloth inside too and shut the lid. Taking another minute to get her hair under control she borrowed his comb and smoothed it out, letting it hang loose around her shoulders. Returning to the bedroom briefly she grabbed her panties and pulled them on before following him downstairs. She simply couldn't bring herself to walk around in nothing but his shirt even if it did fall to mid thigh.

She found him cooking some chicken in a pan, his shirt now buttoned closed, although he had left it un-tucked. He glanced over when he heard her padding into the kitchen after him and smiled, his eyes raking over her from the top of her head to the bottom of her bare feet. "You make my shirts much more appealing." He told her, all approval.

She smiled at him, slipping up next to him. He slid his arm around her waist at once and she leaned into his side having disliked the short separation immensely. It was ridiculous, she knew, to feel that way, but she did. It seemed likely that Rumpelstiltskin felt about the same as he didn't let her go as he cooked in front of his stove. He already had everything he was going to need before she came down and didn't have to move much while he worked. She thought that might be for the best as he was balancing carefully on his good leg, his cane leaning against the counter beside him as he hovered over their meal, needing his free hand to cook with. Despite their afternoon activities she hadn't gotten a good look at his leg, only a brief view of a scar that ran the length of it, and was now curious as to how bad it was. Tilting her head up she kissed his jaw and his eyes slid closed in pleasure.

"You've hurt your leg." She commented, wanting to talk about that.

"It's no matter." He said without interest.

"Yes, but if-"

He cut her off with a warm kiss and she admitted it was a successful distraction. When he pulled away he murmured again. "It's no matter, Belle."

"Can't you use your magic?" She asked, blushing again but refusing to back down now that she had an idea in her head. "You stopped me from hurting."

"It's not the same." He told her.

"Why?" She insisted, wanting to understand.

"Your pain would have faded on it's own without help. The magic sped up the procedure."

She processed that quickly and turned out the relevant information with surprising efficiency. She had learned long ago to pick out the important things he said out of the unimportant. Sometimes she thought it was simply impossible for him to admit things even as he admitted things. "Your leg hurts all the time?"

"It's nothing for you to concern yourself with." He assured her.

"Oh, Rumple." She cupped his face and stroked it gently, upset by this. No one should have to hurt all the time. "Surely there's something that would help. They have medicine in this world that's different than what we had available."

"Yes, medicine that dulls the senses, and I can't afford that. It puts me in a fog."

She was terribly unhappy with this news. "I'm sure there are other options." She didn't know as much as she should about this world, but she knew enough about him to know he would ignore this and turn his attention to other things if he thought it was more important. Since he rarely thought of himself as important with him so focused on finding his son, she was sure he had skipped over something that would make his leg hurt less.

He kissed her again before pulling away. "My leg has been like this a long time, love. I usually don't notice it anymore. I put too much strain on it today, but the pain will be back down in the morning." He smiled at her. "And I think the trade off was more than worth it."

That didn't comfort her all that much. "I don't like that you hurt." She told him. "That's not fair."

"Life is rarely fair." He told her gently. "A lesson we've both learned. My leg does hurt, but I'm alive and got to this world where I needed to be, and one where I found you again. It seems a fairer trade than most."

Nodding slowly she kept touching him, although she didn't feel this was right at all. She would go learn more about this later, when they weren't both half naked and focused on one another. He kissed her again before going back to finishing their meal. When it was nearly done she moved away from him so she could set the table. Going to the stove she filled their plates so he wouldn't have to worry about carrying anything and they sat down at the table together. She was terribly aware that she was in only his shirt as it rode up far too high when she sat, but she picked up her fork to eat all the same. Across from her he stretched his leg out carefully and she could tell it helped at least a bit.

She dug into the meal, which was delicious on top of her being hungry, and he shook his head in either worry or exasperation. Still, he ate more than he normally did and she supposed he had worked up an appetite too. They weren't at the table long, only long enough to finish eating before he caught her hand and took her back upstairs. She went with him freely, and when he tumbled down onto the bed with her again, kissing her hotly, she melted into him, letting him lead her where he would. By the time they fell asleep late that night, having somehow lost the rest of the afternoon and evening entirely she had learned what it meant to be a lover, and what it meant to have one. It was something she was sure she would never be able to forget.

Author's Note: Sorry this update took so long! I am at a full time internship with classes on top of it. I promise not to abandon the fic, but it may take me longer to post from now on. Thanks for all the comments and love for the fic. I've really enjoyed getting all the comments and appreciate you taking the time to write them.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

She woke up with a gasp of fear, flailing badly as the horrid nightmare jolted her awake. Her hand flew to her throat as she felt the cool metal of the hook the strange man had held to her throat so long ago. When she didn't feel anything but her own hand on her skin she calmed slightly as she looked around, utterly disoriented from coming out of such a deep sleep so abruptly. As she tried to catch her breath she recognized the familiar shapes of Rumpelstiltskin's bedroom. Her fear dropped down another notch as she recognized that she was in a safe place, one of the few safe places she had ever been, and looked to her right to find the bed empty.

Frowning, she reached over to his side and felt the displaced sheets. They were cool to the touch, and so was his pillow, and she wondered how long she had been alone. He had certainly been beside her when she fell asleep. Knowing she wouldn't be able to fall back asleep with out him she got up and went to his closet. Grabbing a shirt off a hanger, which was becoming a bit of a habit, she pulled it on and buttoned it up as she left in search of her wayward lover.

Having a good guess as to where he was she padded down the stairs, having no trouble seeing in the dark house. She had often wondered since she escaped the asylum if all her time in the dark had increased her night vision. She never recalled having been so able to navigate the shadows before, but then again she had never had much reason to. Perhaps she was simply misremembering her early years the way most people did. Hearing nothing in the main house, and not having him respond when she called his name, she walked out the back door and to the outside entrance of the basement. Why it wasn't connected to the rest of the house she didn't know, but didn't much care for the short, cold walk outside to get to his workroom.

Opening the door, now completely unmolested by the protection spell he had around the house, she stepped in and dragged it closed behind her quickly to keep the early fall chill out of the already cool basement. It shut with a small bump and she went farther down into the earth, although there was a light shinning softly ahead of her that made it easy to navigate. Reaching the bottom of the stairs she turned and followed the small sounds of clinking glass and bubbling liquids. As she turned the corner she saw him at once. He was sitting sideways at a bench watching a gold liquid drip from a thin glass tube and plunk, drop by minuscule drop, into a glass cylinder that was no bigger around than her thumb. He was dressed again, although she had made very sure he was undressed a few hours ago. She supposed it was something that he hadn't put on a tie. "Rumple?"

He glanced over his shoulder at once when she called to him groggily. "You should be asleep, dearest."

She walked to him, blinking owlishly in her sleepiness, and plunked down beside him on the bench. Without a thought she wrapped her arms around his waist and flopped against his back gracelessly, most of her weight pressing against him. He had no trouble supporting her as she wallowed him near to death, but he had most likely anticipated the reaction after the last few weeks and braced himself for the impact. She had found she was even more openly tactile than before, and thought it must be a reaction to being alone so long. Almost as soon as they started sleeping together she had been all over him with affection, and to her surprise instead of becoming annoyed with her near clinging he had soaked it up, all but reveling in it, always inviting her to him. She wasn't the only one that had been alone too long it seemed.

"I had a nightmare." She told him tiredly as she found a good way to lean her weight on him.

"I thought those had stopped." He said, turning his attention to her as whatever potion he was making finished dripping, which looked as if it would take awhile at the rate it was going. He didn't ask her what it was about, had learned not to after she woke him up a few times and refused point blank to speak about why she was shaking like mad and covered in a cold sweat. He hadn't pushed her about it, only whispered he would listen if she need him to as he held her tightly against him in the dark so she knew she wasn't alone. So far she hadn't taken him up on that offer, and as the days went by the nightmares had all but stopped when she was with him. He must have thought they had gone altogether.

"I don't usually have them when you're sleeping with me." She told him. "They find me when you're away."

He rubbed at her arms, which were easy to reach as they were wrapped loosely around his middle. "I didn't think you would wake up." He told her. "You'd been asleep a few hours before I got up."

She settled her head between his shoulder blades, using him as a pillow as she looked over his worktable. It was a complex mess of equipment and papers covered in diagrams. There were all manner of other things scattered about as well. There were rose petals, feathers, small stones, powders of all kinds and colors, small gemstones, his gold thread, and at least five-dozen glass containers of rainbow hued liquids. She wondered how he could keep it all straight in his head, knowing there must be thousands upon thousands of combinations of things to remember and try. "What are you doing?"

He sighed. "So far nothing at all." She heard the frustration seeping in his voice. "I've tried half a dozen things to break through this damn line and nothing is strong enough to stand up to it."

"Rumple, you haven't slept properly in days and you've been using too much magic. You're tired. You need to rest. It's no wonder you're having trouble."

"I haven't used that much magic." He said in annoyance and she supposed from his perspective that was true. Compared to the things he used to do he wasn't using much magic at all.

She tried to be reasonable. "You're the one that keeps saying this place is different. Magic doesn't work the same here. It's been giving you headaches hasn't it?"

"I'm fine."

"Liar." She mumbled as she rubbed her cheek against his back, although with no anger or judgment. She knew he was tired. He had been using his magic nearly nonstop to help James and Henry for the last week. Whoever this Cora woman was she had him nervous, which was frightening when she thought about it. Rumple was rarely nervous about another person. Rumpelstiltskin was annoyed by people, angered by people, irritated by people, but not nervous about them. It set her teeth on edge to see it in him.

"All this has to do with Cora doesn't it?" She asked softly. He had been on edge for days now, angry and snappish, although it wasn't directed at her, quite the opposite in fact. He had become so protective it was near to driving her mad. While she appreciated that he was worried for her she could only take so much hovering. She had become independent, more so than ever before, and he was really infringing on that despite his good intentions and their dramatically increased intimacy. They had gotten into a small spat over it three days ago when he insisted she stay in the shop with him instead of working at the library, and he had finally compromised with her as the fight got really heated and it became apparent she wasn't going to back down. He had given her a cell phone of her own to use in case something happened when he wasn't there and that had soothed her ruffled feathers as well as his. Although why she needed more than the bracelet was beyond her, but if it made him feel better she was willing to carry it with her. At any rate they had made up quickly, which was a rather enjoyable affair now that they were having an affair. It made mutual apologies much more creative a thing, and far more satisfying.

Yesterday was actually the longest amount of time they had spent apart since they had started sleeping together two weeks ago. It had been just over a full day and she had been missing him. She hadn't seen him the night before at all and he hadn't picked her up until late this evening because he had told her he had to work, and she did believe him, so she hadn't made it an issue. "It does."

"Tell me." She insisted gently.

"Henry has been communicating with another person from our old land who was put under a sleeping curse and awoken." He answered her question before she could ask it. "It traps their minds in a nether realm when they sleep. We've been trying to work out a way to get Snow White and Miss Swan back here. Unfortunately, Henry was burned more than once trying and I'm running out of ideas." He was quiet for a moment. "It's very likely that if they get back Cora will also come through after them, or simply steal away their gateway and kill them before coming herself."

"Is she so dangerous?" She asked, really wondering if she was, or if she was making this worse in her own head. Regina's fear at the inn was catching, but then again with her power gone Regina wasn't an overly brave woman herself. Perhaps she was letting the woman get to her and that was unacceptable.

He rubbed her arm again, which confirmed that she was indeed very dangerous. "I'll keep you safe, Belle."

"It's not me I'm worried about." She told him. "Will this woman hurt you if she comes?"

"She doesn't have the power to hurt me." He told her. "And she'll need time to acclimate to how magic works here."

"You didn't think Regina could hurt you either." She pointed out. "And she managed to inflict rather a large amount of damage." He flinched, although she hadn't said it to be cruel. "I'm not trying to make you hurt, Rumple, but we need to be realistic. We need to talk about this seriously. I'm a liability to you."

"No." He all but snarled. "You are not."

"I am." She disagreed. "And frankly so is Bae. Does anyone else know about him?" He pressed his lips tightly together. Her stomach bunched again. "Who else knows?"

"Only one person. He won't say anything."

"Are you sure?" She pressed.

"I've had centuries to learn to read people." He told her waspishly. "I'm sure."

"I'm not trying to nag you." She said, a little hurt by his tone. "I'm worried for you, and for your son. He has no idea that you're here, or what kind of danger will be after him if anyone works it out."

He flinched a little a second time. "I'm sorry, dearie. I know you're trying to help me."

"And I know you don't like feeling cornered." She answered back. "I'm putting you in a harder place than you need to be in. Everyone knows about me now. I'm not a secret you can keep anymore. I'm afraid you'll get hurt because of me."

He found her hand and held it tightly. "You're worth getting hurt for." He told her. "You're worth fighting for."

She knew what that meant coming from him, a man that loathed danger the way he did. Still, she was more concerned for him than herself. She could handle herself even if she didn't have magic, she had learned that long ago. "We need to get you out of Storybrooke, Rumple." There was someone else that needed to be considered than her safety, or his. "We need to get you to your son before someone else works out how to do that. He won't be prepared to defend himself the way he needs to in this world. He thinks there's no way for you to get here, that there's no magic here."

"I'm working on it." He told her, nodding to the various items on the table.

"You're working on how to keep Cora in our old world." She told him bluntly. "This doesn't seem the sort of thing you can split your attention on and that's what you're doing." She looked over all the contraptions scattered about, the piles of books, which were in total disarray, the loose notes, and his spinning wheel, which was placed at a haphazard angle over in the corner. She had never seen his wheel anything but pristine and place safely and prominently in a room before. The whole place was a disorganized mess and he was not the sort that worked well in this type of setting no matter how many things he kept around himself. He was meticulous and mindful. To see his workshop in this state was all she needed to know that he wasn't thinking properly, or working at the best of his abilities.

"Sometimes patience is a necessity. We need to prevent Cora from getting here at all. At the moment that's the highest priority. If she's stuck there she can't get to you or Bae here." He said, although it was clear he wasn't pleased about the way his priorities were ordered.

"You're assuming if she gets to this world she'll end up here. What if she ends up somewhere else and you're still trapped in Storybrooke? What if she can walk through the line with nothing happening to her because she wasn't caught up in the curse to begin with?"

"Both of those scenarios are very unlikely."

"Which means it's still possible." She said, knowing that the odds weren't always stacked in your favor.

"Cora wants to get to Regina." He pointed out. "Not to Bae. She doesn't know about him."

"And you want to get to your son." She told him. "You didn't end up right beside him did you?" She was trying to be realistic. "You had to be sneaky about it. It's very possible she'll be sneaky about things too. You're the most powerful person here. You're the only one that can stand up to her if I'm guessing properly. Do you think this woman won't go to any extreme to get you out of the way so she can have what she wants?" She saw him turning that over. "I know you don't care for Regina, not after all that's happened between you, but Cora does. You aren't the only parent worried for their child. She'll do whatever it takes to get hers and you're a problem to be dealt with. Bae is an easy solution when it comes to dealing with you."

He sighed, conceding the point to her. "It would be best to stop her now before this becomes a real problem."

"Yes, it would." She agreed. "The fact remains you need to get out of here though." She was quiet for a moment before speaking. "I'm glad you're helping Henry and James, really I am, but I think it's more important that you figure out how to leave."

"Are you suggesting I do the selfish thing?" He asked with some surprise.

"Taking care of your son is not a selfish thing." She told him. "I think between all of the rest of us we could stop Cora if we needed to, even if it means I stay here while you go to help do that. What we can't do is leave this place on our own. Only you can do that."

"It seems I can't." He said bitterly.

"You will." She said confidently. "Because you're clever and you want it. You'll work this out, but I don't think it'll be tonight for all your trying. You're too tired to think properly."

He let out a sigh of discontented exhaustion. "Perhaps you're right." He admitted reluctantly.

She squeezed his hand. "Come back to bed." She urged softly. "You need to rest for a little while." When his eyes returned to his potion she lifted her head up and kissed at the back of his neck. A small shudder ran down his spine and she pushed her advantage. "You'll think better after you sleep. It'll go faster in the long run if you take time to rest when you need it."

Giving in with no further protest he got up and she followed as he reached over and spun a small knob that stopped the liquid from dripping out of the tube. As he straightened she heard a small sort of scrapping noise farther in the basement. Squinting into the shadows she reached for him absently. "Do you hear that?" She asked, concerned that someone may have snuck down in here without him knowing.

"It's only a rat." He said calmly.

She let out a squeak of protest at this information and scrambled back to the door. It was either that or leap on him, and she rather thought that would really be the end of his leg. She had many dreadful memories of those particular vermin, none of which she wanted to relive in any way. She didn't even want to think of a rat, let alone have one near her. "I _don't_ like rats, Rumpelstiltskin!" He huffed as she scampered up the stairs to the exit, following her more sedately. "I'm not staying in this house if there are rats!"

"There are no rats in the house." He assured her. "Only down here."

"Set some traps." She insisted as she hurried out as fast as she could without all out running. Having rats down here was just one more reason to dislike the basement for her.

"Then it would die." He pointed out. "And rats can be terribly useful."

"Useful how?" She asked as she stepped outside into the chilly air.

"To test spells with."

She sent him a look that she felt properly conveyed her disgust. "You better not have ever used rat magic on me! Or a spell made out of rats! Or whatever it is you do with the things!"

His lip twitched like mad as he shut the door to the basement and locked it with a key on top of the magic that was already there. "I assure you I haven't."

"That better be true." She told him adamantly as they went back to the house. "If it isn't I will find a way to punish you very creatively." He smiled in amusement at her threat, which wasn't all that sincere really. She all but ran him over to get out of the cold when she was finished with her warning, not to mention put space between herself and the rats, and he shook his head as she jumped through the doorway and into the heated house.

"It's too cold for you to be running around outside in that." He informed her. "No matter how lovely a view it gives me."

"You'll have to get me warm then." She reasoned without worry, not at all bothered he was looking at her bare legs. She found she rather liked teasing him with them.

"I thought I was supposed to be resting?" He asked, his pace increasing slightly as he trailed her more closely, his face filling with lust.

"That's why we're going to bed." She said, sending him the most innocent look she could manage, pretending she had not a clue as to what he was referring to.

He let out an amused sound and snatched at her. Letting out a delighted laugh she dodged away, having speed on him if not grace. "Get back here, Belle." He ordered with playful lust.

She threw an inviting look over her shoulder as she darted up the stairs as she issued her own challenge. "Come get me, Rumpelstiltskin." He growled and came after her, his leg slowing him, and she laughed again as she darted up the landing, loosing sight of him as she went. Smiling, she turned around and walked backward toward the bedroom, waiting for him to appear at the top of the staircase so she could tease him some more. As she went she realized she didn't hear him or anything for that matter, and frowned, coming to a stop in the middle of the hall. "Rumple?" She called. There was no answer and she faltered, taking a step back toward the stairs. "Rumple?" She said a bit more hesitantly.

"Yes, dearest?" He asked silkily right behind her as his arms latched around her waist.

She let out a shriek of surprise and he laughed. He had used his magic to come up the stairs and scare her on purpose. She caught sight of a few wisps of purple smoke near the floor once she realized she wasn't being attacked by something. "Cheater!" She accused good-naturedly. "Magic isn't playing fair!"

"Wearing nothing but my shirt isn't playing fair." He told her as he spun her around and kissed her. She smiled into his lips and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. He mumbled between kisses. "I'm evening the playing field."

"Can you even it in the bed instead of the hall?" She asked breathlessly, thinking that would be both warmer and more comfortable.

He smirked into her mouth and drew her into the room with him at once. "I think so." He agreed.

"You're a very considerate man." She said as they fumbled and stumbled their way to the bed, bouncing off things as they focused more on taking off each other's clothes than what was around them. She found the process a bit unfair as he had far more clothes on than she did, but as the end goal was the same he helped get his own clothes off after he pealed his shirt off of her. As he loosened his pants she shoved him gently and his legs hit the back of the bed. He toppled down over it with a grunt and she pounced him with a playful giggle. He watched her with lustful, approving, interest as he lay sprawled under her, his back to the blankets and his legs hanging off the side of the big bed. She had never been quite so forward before, always allowing him to lead this dance. But she felt comfortable with him this way now, felt comfortable with herself in this new role as lover. It was a strange sort of adjustment, as if a part of her she never knew about had woken up from a deep sleep, and she was reveling in it.

Leaning down she kissed him warmly and his hands settled on her hips. He made no move to get out from under her, simply lay where she had pushed him down and ran his hands over her as they kissed. Loosing herself in him with ease she reached down and began to tug at the fastening of his pants. He finally shifted, lifting up his good leg and shoving hard. He managed to scoot them farther onto the bed so they were fully on it. She was rather impressed with the sudden display of strength as well as the feel of his muscles bunching below her. He grinned when he caught her expression and kissed her again, encouraging her to continue on.

Amused with him, and truly having fun she reached back down for his pants, sitting up over him so she could reach them easier. His eyes flowed up her body appreciatively as she put herself on display for him, and he ran his hands over her legs as he watched her. "Dare I ask what you're planning to do to me, dearie?"

She just smiled as she got his pants loose and then leaned down and kissed him again as she lifted herself up a little so she could shimmy them off. He kicked his shoes off, which were quickly followed by his socks, and then he managed to get his pants off his hips and down his legs without dislodging her. It was fairly impressive feat when she thought about it, although she had better things to think of. After their talk in the shop a few weeks ago she had gotten rather curious over exactly what she could find on a computer, considering he said it was just like the largest encyclopedia ever made. Her search had resulted in rather… a lot more information than she had anticipated. She had blushed for hours as she floundered about trying to separate the obscene, which there was an overabundance of, and, well, helpful tips and ideas. She may have been innocent prior to going to bed with him, but stupid she was not. She was more than convinced he was in no way inexperienced, not that she wanted to think about that, and must be wanting more than a compliant partner who was constantly following his lead, no matter how eager she was to do so.

Having found herself fretting over that more than one night as he slept behind her she went and did something about it. She always felt better when she was solving a problem, and while this might not be really considered a problem per say, it was something she felt she could learn more about, so she had. Having done that she hoped he wouldn't mind her experimenting on him. With the way he was watching her she suspected not and stopped thinking about anything but enjoying herself and making sure he did too. Breaking away from his mouth she began to kiss her way down his neck as she shimmied down his body, trying to go slowly so he would enjoy this, but unsure of just how slow to go having never done this before. When Rumpelstiltskin realized what direction she was going he went totally still, his hands resting just above her hips lightly. She couldn't tell if he wanted her to stop but didn't want to say it for fear of upsetting her, or if he didn't want her to stop at all and was afraid to say anything for fear of upsetting her.

As her mind turned that over she reached his chest and nipped at his skin lightly. He let out a low groan, and recognizing it as a very good sound her confidence was immediately buoyed. Her zeal reignited she kept moving down, kissing a warm trail down his skin. When she reached his navel and nipped him a second time he let out a soft curse and shifted slightly, unable to keep himself still as her breasts brushed over his hardness. His hands suddenly flew up to her head and tangled in her hair. His fingers rubbed her scalp gently, although she felt the restraint he was exerting in the way he was touching her, in how stiff his body was below hers. When she moved lower still he lifted his head up so he could see her, which really made her a bit nervous about the whole thing. When she looked up at the movement though, his eyes were so dark with lust it had her pausing. He let out a little sound in the back of his throat, a sound somewhere between prompting and begging, and she shifted the last few inches down, finding a place between his legs to situate herself as she tried this.

As she contemplated the whole prospect he made the sound a second time, curling a strand of her hair around his thumb. "Belle." He breathed raggedly. Dipping her head down at the near begging she kissed him. He muttered another curse, and quite adamantly, and she found herself smiling a little. Apparently the information she had found had been fairly accurate. Deciding to see how much of that particular article was she kissed her way along him, stopping at the tip and taking him into her mouth. His hips jerked and he slid farther into her mouth than she anticipated. Pulling back at once when he startled her had him muttering a string of apologies as he coaxed her back.

Sending him a sassy look she spoke. "I really must insist you behave yourself, Rumple."

"Deepest apologies, dearie." He rasped out. "I'll do my very best."

Humming at him the way she did she went back to what she had been doing. As she worked out how best to do this he began to pant and groan, his hands flexing as he held onto her. She could tell he really was doing his best to restrain himself, although his whole body had gone taut as he fought for control. Finding a pattern he liked, and she was judging based on the amount of groans, profanities, and encouragements that were coming out of him, she was just relaxing into it when he let go of her hair and caught her shoulders, tugging her up quickly. "What-" Was as far as she got before he was kissing her hard. Her question trailed off into a muffled groan and he rolled them so he was over her. As he pressed insistently against her leg she broke the kiss and gave him a put upon look which confused him even through his desire before she pushed her arm back into the mattress and rolled them back over so she was over him again. "My turn to be up here." She told him firmly.

"Gods, woman, what have you been reading this time?" He asked as he pulled her hips down over his so she was in the right position.

"Stop asking questions." She ordered, bemused he knew what she had done, as she lifted herself up and slid down over him. He groaned again as she settled flat against him and sat back up. To her surprise what she had thought would be a fun position for him was an excellent one for her. She let out her own breath as he pressed inside her in a different way. She was caught so off guard by it that she stilled, trying to adjust, and he put his hands on her hips again. Holding her firmly he began to rock her as best he could.

"Move for me, love." He gasped

Catching herself she did, swaying over him on her own as her mind began to cloud over with desire and pleasure. Rumpelstiltskin, now sure she was set on her course, let go of her hips so he could touch the rest of her. His long, nimble fingers traced her and she thought it a waste of his talent to spend so much time spinning gold. He always seemed to know just how much pressure to use to make her breathing come out in halting pants and have her eyes falling closed in ecstasy. This time was no different and as he ran his hands down her arms she began to quiver all over as she lost pace as she rocked. Catching her dragged her down so she was draped over him and he pressed his hips up into her, keeping the rhythm she had established when they started. She tried to keep up with him as he found her mouth and kissed her, but a minute later she knew she was too close to the brink to think. Whining into his mouth she clutched at his shoulders and he pressed into her harder. Her legs clamped hard around him and all at once she snapped. Crying his name out she shuddered all the way down her body as she came.

Rumpelstiltskin let out a grunt and clutched at her as he pressed as far up into her as he could. Closing his eyes he let go, his hands clamped over her as he found his own release. He continued to hold her tightly as she slumped bonelessly over him and breathed heavily as she held his shoulders. He was panting as well, his hand on her hips and still buried inside her. After a moment he began to rub his hand over her back and she let herself stay limp over him. "Gods, Belle." He managed to say around his effort to get air into his lungs. She nuzzled at him, loving this more than she could say, loving him more than she could say. Slowly, he twisted them so they were both on their sides. She shifted to help him and he slid out of her slickly as they readjusted.

Reaching over he caught the blanket and pulled it over them as he kissed her warmly. "Aren't you happy you came back to bed?" She asked with sleepy satisfaction.

"I'm not unhappy." He agreed, which had her laughing breathlessly in remembrance of his excitement over her return to the castle so long ago. "Although it was rather a vigorous respite." She laughed more, blushing as she did, and he kissed her again.

"I'll let you sleep now." She promised.

He hummed quietly as they got comfortable together. It always took them a minute or two to get settled, mostly because she liked to snuggle and it was easier with him right after they made love. He let her jostle him all she liked and when she finally twisted around and pulled his arm over her so they were spooned together he relaxed fully at her back. She was just drifting off when he moved his hand and reached up to brush her hair around. It was no doubt tickling his nose, the only thing that ever seemed to disturb him when they were in bed together, and the tips of his fingers brushed over the bottom of her chin, right where the memory hook had been.

The touch had her jolting away as her mind, fully relaxed, was unprepared to deal with the stimulus. He let out a sound of surprise as she nearly threw herself off the bed and grabbed at her before she could topple off. "Belle?" He asked in alarm as she brushed desperately at her neck, trying to make the imaginary feeling go away. "What's wrong?"

"N-nothing." She said as she rubbed harder at her skin, swearing she could feel the cool metal there still. "You surprised me."

"That was more than surprise, dearie." He murmured knowingly. "I didn't mean to scare you. What did I do?"

She laid back down as she evened her breathing out, which she had found tended to help calm her when her nerves got the best of her. "Really, you didn't do anything. It was because of the nightmare earlier. It's fine." Without a word he reached over and brushed her chin again. She flinched so badly that he had to hold her down on the bed.

"Clearly it isn't fine." He said quietly. "Who hurt you?"

Of course he could tell she'd been hurt. There was no other explanation as to why she was reacting the way she was. "I don't know who he was." She whispered as her shoulders hunched up. "He tried to trick me into telling him something when Regina had me." She licked her lips. "She may have killed him. I don't know what happened really."

He was quiet for a moment and she felt him tense up. He was obviously angry and trying not to show it so he wouldn't frighten her further. "He wasn't sent by her?"

"No, at least I don't think so." She said softly. "She didn't talk to me after the first month she had me, and she wouldn't let anyone else talk to me either." She shoved the thought aside. "I don't know how long I was there before he came. More than a year I think, but I lost track of days without a window. He broke into my cell."

That was more information than she had ever voluntarily given him about her imprisonment all together. "What did he want to know?"

"He wanted to know about a weapon."

"What sort of weapon?" He asked, all his attention on the story.

"He said there was a weapon that could kill you." His whole body went rigid. "A dagger. He thought I knew where it was. He said you were going to kill my father and it was the only way to stop you." She had never believed him, not for a second. "I told him you wouldn't do that and that I didn't know anything about it." She shrugged. "He was going to kill me then. He threatened me, he was going to slit my throat. I saw Regina open the door right before he hit me and knocked me out." Behind her Rumple was utterly rigid as she tried to clarify what she realized was a bit of a jumble of words and thoughts. "He told me he was going to break me out, but I could tell he was lying. When I wouldn't help he got angry. Regina must have done something because I was still alive when I came to and I was sure he meant it when said he would kill me."

"Who was he?"

"I don't know. I'd never seen him before and I haven't seen him in town either."

"Are you sure?" He asked, and she was very sure if the man was Rumple would kill him on the spot for touching her.

"He was singular." She told him. "I would recognize him if he were here." She pulled the blanket tighter around herself. "You don't forget a man with a hook for a hand."

"A hook?" He said, an odd inflection in his voice. "What do you mean a hook?"

"He had a big silver hook instead of his hand." She said, unsure how that was unclear. "He kept pressing it against my throat when I wouldn't cooperate with him."

He was quiet for several long seconds. "That's an odd feature."

"Do you know what he was talking about? Or why he wanted you dead?"

"Any number of people have wanted me dead, many of which I never met." He answered. "But I do know what he was talking about. How he found out about the dagger I don't know."

"Can it really kill you?" She asked.

"Yes." He said simply. "But no one will find it. It's hidden in a safe place."

She thought it might be best not to ask any more questions. It wouldn't be safe for her to know, or for him if someone caught her and wanted that information. "That's good." She said.

He rolled her over so she was facing him. Taking her in he rubbed her cheek, as if knowing where she had been backhanded so long ago now. "I'm sorry, love." He whispered sincerely. "No one is going to hurt you again." She simply moved closer to him, tucking herself tightly up against him. "I promise-"

Reaching up she set her finger over his lips, silencing him. "No more promises you can't keep." She whispered gently. "I won't have you guilty over it if something happens. You have enough guilt as it is."

"I'm going to protect you." He told her.

"I believe you." She said as she met his eyes. "But even the all powerful Rumpelstiltskin can't control everything. I won't let you promise that." She kissed him warmly; trying to relax them both again after the small scare he gave her. "Promise me something else."

He watched her intently. "What should I promise?"

She smiled at him tenderly as she thought about it. "Promise me… promise me you'll never forget me, no matter how old you get, or how long you live."

Catching her hand he pulled it up and kissed her knuckles. "I hardly need to promise that." He told her. "You've branded yourself on my heart. I can't have it beat without thinking of you."

Well, that was a very pretty thing to hear. She smiled shyly at him for that and he kissed her knuckles again before using his thumb to extend her fingers up so he could kiss her palm. "I'm all set then." She told him.

He kissed her palm again. "Something else." He insisted.

"Something else?" She asked.

"Challenge me at least a little." He murmured as he put her hand on his chest, holding his over it as he rubbed her with his thumb. "What do you want?"

"I find myself quite content, Rumpelstiltskin." She told him.

He kissed her palm again, unbelieving. "There has to be something."

"There isn't." She told him as she pulled her hand away so she could replace her palm with her lips. He cupped the back of her head and they kissed languidly for a long, prefect minute. When they broke away she continued her thought. "I'm happy here with you." She promised. "I have everything I want. Really I do."

Letting out a little hum he tucked her back against him, settling his head so hers was tucked under his chin. "We'll stay." He whispered.

"Stay?" She asked.

"We'll stay here in this world and be happy." He clarified.

She lifted her head up at once. He was watching her with utter sincerity and she felt her chest constricting. "Truly?"

"Yes." He said a little gruffly.

She all but tackled him in her excitement and relief. He grunted at the impact and she hugged him tightly. "We will be happy." She swore adamantly as she raised her head and kissed him rapidly all over his face. "I promise we will be. It'll be right the way it's supposed to be, and we'll have a life, and a home, and whatever else you want." He managed to hold her still long enough to give her a proper kiss before she snuggled down against him, so happy she could barely breathe properly. "I love you so much, Rumpelstiltskin."

"I love you too, Belle." He whispered. "I want you to be happy. You just need to give me enough time to find Bae."

"Of course." She assured him. "Of course I'll give you all the time you need to find him." Leaning down he kissed her one more time before they both went quiet. Looping her arm over his waist she let her fingers brush over his back soothingly until his breathing evened out and his heartbeat slowed. Knowing he was either asleep or close to it she let herself drift off, feeling happier than she ever had been before.

Author Note: Oh, I am so sorry this took so long. My life is madness right now, seriously, madness. I will try to get the next chapter up quicker and hope this one was worth waiting for. Thanks for all the reviews and comments. They've really been wonderful to get.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

Standing in the back of his shop she looked after the royal couple and their daughter as they went after Regina, after Archie's murderer. Rumple was looking at the dream catcher with interest, his thoughts far away. She had no doubt he was thinking about the magic Emma had just done, and was thinking ahead to what else she could, or might be able to do. As he thought Pogo let out a small whine that tore at her heart. It was full of sadness and she could only feel for him. Dogs were loyalty all the way to their cores and his master was gone. She could only imagine how much it must have hurt for him to be forced to watch Archie killed and been unable to do anything.

Taking a step forward she knelt down and patted the dogs head. He whined again and she scratched his ears. "Poor thing." She murmured. The dog looked up at her with soulful brown eyes. "Are you hungry? I have sandwiches." The dog wagged his tail a little and she figured that was a yes.

Rumple looked up at that. "I thought those were for me?"

She sent him a look over her shoulder as she stood up. "You're going to share today." She told him firmly. "Especially with such a helpful dog."

His lip curled up in amusement as the dog followed her to the front of the shop and the picnic basket she had brought. The dog followed close to her, all but leaning against her as they walked. That won the argument for her as the soft spot he had for her mixed up with his apparent but unknown love of dogs. "Oh, very well." He said with false grumpiness.

Smiling, they walked back into the main shop and she opened the basket. Pulling out one of the sandwiches she unwrapped it from the plastic she had it in and set it on the ground for the dog. He wagged his tail and she patted his head again. "Don't eat the plastic." She told him, somehow able to tell he could understand her in a way no dog should be able to. He let out a low wuff and began to eat the sandwich with surprising daintiness. Rumple glanced down at him briefly before getting the second sandwich out. Opening it he handed her half and took the other for himself. As she took it, perfectly comfortable sharing, she spoke. "I've never seen a dog that looks like this before.

"You mean his coat?" He asked as he opened the sandwich, which had been hers, and picked the tomato off the top with a look of disgust at the glossy red food.

She nodded as she stared at the dog, unconcerned with his disdain over her food choices. "He's beautiful."

"He's a Dalmatian." He told her as he wiped his hand on a napkin to get rid of possibility that the tomato juice might still be on his hand and would therefore contaminate the sandwich in some way. "It's a special breed of dog. They're prized for their fur."

"I suppose I can see why, although it seems a silly thing to breed for."

He shook his head at her as he bit into his sandwich. She took a bite of her own half as she thought over the last few minutes. Emma had been so shocked she could use magic, although Rumpelstiltskin appeared to have been waiting for her to do so patiently, the way a farmer waits for the spring rain to start falling. It made her wonder if the savior were special, or if everyone had the potential to learn if given the opportunity. It seemed as if they must, although she doubted they could all be so powerful. Perhaps it was like math, given enough time everyone could learn, but not everyone could work out the more complex and mysterious equations she kept stumbling across in books at the library. She was still trying to work calculus out, but it was slow going despite her persistence in reading the books. When she swallowed she asked about it. "Can anyone learn to use magic?" She asked.

"No!" He snarled so viciously that she drew away from him in alarm as Pogo scampered behind her, forgetting about his treat in his fright. He scared her again, the rage in him, the fear, all of it was slamming into her like hammer blows. At her expression he drew back into himself, trying to regain his calm. "No." He said in a more reasonably tone. "They can't, and I'm not teaching you."

She eyed him. "I didn't ask you to." She pointed out, wondering why such a simple question threw him into such rage.

He set his food down. "Forgive me, Belle, many have asked over the years and it always ends the same way. I don't want you meddling with it. Little good comes from magic in the end, no matter how I cling to it. It would eat you alive given even half a chance."

She shook her head a little. "Learning magic would kill me?"

He was silent for a moment before speaking. "It would kill what defines you." He told her. "It would destroy your goodness, although so slowly you wouldn't be able to tell at first. By the time you did it would be too late and the gods know I wouldn't stop you if you went out of control. I would have to hurt you or worse, and that I can't do." He had clearly lost his appetite, tossing the food back down. "Don't ask me to teach you."

"I promise I won't." She said with soft sincerity. While the idea might be interesting, she had seen what magic had done to him. She couldn't imagine getting to such a place, but if Rumpelstiltskin could, a man with more will power and cunning than anyone she had ever met, she was sure she could. "I was only curious."

He tried to smile, although failed miserably. "Of course you were. You always are."

"You're angry with me."

"Not at all." He assured her. "You're curious about everything all the time, dearie. It's no sin to be curious. You simply surprised me." Quietly, he held his hand out to her over the counter between them. "It's incredibly hard to say no to you. I'm afraid if pushed I would teach you no matter that I know the consequences of it. It's myself I'm angry with, not you."

Reaching out she took his hand. "It was only a question, Rumple." She assured him. "That's all it was. I can do whatever I want to do without it. I don't need to know magic, and I don't want to."

He squeezed her hand, relieved. "Good." He said as he calmed down.

"What's going to happen to Emma?" She asked.

He frowned in confusion. "What?"

"All magic comes at a price." She said. "And she just did magic. What will her price be?"

He was quiet again, for much longer, before he answered. His thumb ran over her hand as he spoke. "Her price will be knowing that she can use it."

"I don't understand. How is that a price?"

"What would you do, Belle, if you woke up one day and learned you could fly?"

"If I could fly?" She asked, finding that an odd question.

"Yes, what would you do?"

She thought about that for a moment. "I suppose I would see how far I could go, or how high."

"Because it wouldn't be enough to just go from one place to another and be done with it once would it?"

She understood what he was trying to convey all at once. "The magic is trying to trap her? To trick her into doing more?" She was flabbergasted. "You make it sound like it's… Like it's a conscious thing."

"I have wondered that." He said absently as he twined their fingers together. "Some prices, they're so terribly painful. I don't know how anything that wasn't self aware could be so horribly accurate in assessing what should be taken in exchange for something else. It's tricked even me time and again."

"That's not fair."

"On the contrary." He said bitterly. "It is exceedingly fair. Whatever magic is, it does keep the balance oh so perfectly. The problem is, no one knows what's being balanced until it all evens out." She opened her mouth to ask something else before changing her mind. This was clearly an uncomfortable subject for him and she didn't want to drag it out further despite her questions. However, he prompted her all the same. "Ask whatever it is." His lip curled up at the corner as some humor returned to him at last. "You'll go mad from it unless you get an answer."

"If that's true than how could the fairies always use magic and not have consequences? That doesn't make any sense."

"Who says there aren't consequences?" He asked.

"But they do magic all the time." She pointed out. "They grant wishes and fix things. No one ever gets hurt from it."

A snarl overtook his face for a moment. "Is that so?"

"Isn't it?" She asked, really wanting to know. "I've never heard of anything bad happening from fairy magic before."

"Just because they don't advertise it doesn't mean there aren't consequences." He said. "Tell me, when a fairy grants a wish and makes someone's dreams come true, aren't they inevitably stopping someone else from getting whatever that person wished for?"

That brought her up short. "But not everyone has the same dream." She pointed out reasonably. The gods know her wishes didn't match anyone else's.

"Do you know how many women dream of being a princess?" He asked, and sadly, she could name three from her childhood without having to think. "Many dream it, and some work very hard to find a prince. So what happens when a fairy takes one, almost always out of some remote location with a tragically uninteresting story, and places her in the right place at the right time to meet their prince charming?"

"They fall in love?" She said as more of a question than an answer.

"They do." He agreed, turning her hand over so he could run his thumb over her inner wrist. She shivered at the sensation. "And what happens to those other women that worked so very hard to get to that same place? The ones that didn't have the good fortune of meeting a fairy? The one's that weren't at the right place at the right time?"

"I don't know." She answered honestly.

"Of course you know. Their dreams come tumbling down about their ears." He looked up at her. "There's always a price, Belle, you just can't always see it. Magic is an unfair advantage regardless of who uses it. At least I'm up front about it."

She supposed that was true. "That's… that's just horrible." She said at last, feeling suddenly horrible for all the nameless, faceless women that didn't find a way out of poverty, bad families, or unhappy circumstances.

"Life can often be that way." He told her.

"It doesn't have to be." She said, hurt by his pessimism for some reason. "There's always something you can love and be happy about."

"Not for everyone."

"Yes for everyone." She disagreed. "You have to work at it sometimes, but it's always there."

Letting go of her hand he reached up and caressed her cheek. "Dearie, you are a marvel, but we both know the curse left you with nothing to be happy about or love for a very long time."

"It didn't last forever." She pointed out, although she got edgy at the very implication of her imprisonment.

"That doesn't take the hurt away."

She wasn't sure if they were only talking about her right now. "No, but it makes it an easier burden to bear."

He watched her with that odd, baffled, enamored expression he got when she surprised him, or made him think in a way he hadn't before. "I suppose it does."

"I read somewhere once that every story has a happy ending, and if you aren't happy, you aren't at the end of your story yet." He looked bemused. "I think maybe our story is simply exceptionally long, especially yours as you've been going about life rather a bit longer than I have."

He huffed out a laugh. "Thank you for being so delicate about my age."

"You're welcome." She said with twinkling eyes. "Now finish your food. You keep skipping meals. Cora didn't get through the gate so there's no need for you to keep fretting this way. It's no wonder you're so slim with the way you eat."

He sent her a look at her badgering, but she knew deep down he liked that someone cared enough to bother him about things like that. "Yes, dearie." He replied sarcastically. She sent him a cheeky smile as she went back to her sandwich, leaning against he counter and looking down through the glass at his wares. He had any number of things in it, some of which she recognized and others she didn't. The looking occupied her as he finished his half and pulled out a container of fruit she had also brought, as well as two water bottles. "Do you see something you fancy?" He asked conversationally.

She looked up at him. "One thing, yes." She agreed.

"What might that be?" She continued to watch him and smiled with amused fondness. He suddenly understood what she had meant and actually got mildly flustered. Having never seen him embarrassed in this way before, when she was flirting with him, had her eyes sparkling happily. "Yes well." He cleared his throat as he straightened his tie busily. "I'm afraid I can't take myself out of the display case and let you admire me."

"That's all right." She replied easily. "I can admire you quite well where you are, and again later this evening."

He was trying very hard not to laugh, blush, or grab her and throw her down on the floor so he could rip off all their clothes and take her right there, she could see him fighting the impulses down one at a time. "Dare I ask where this brazen streak came from?" He asked mildly, maintaining his dignity.

Really, she had no idea, but she was rather having fun flirting this way. She had been feeling much more in control since he allowed her to take charge the other night. Maybe she had thought he would curtail that in some way, and she supposed it was a valid concern. He had such a need to be in control, which she half understood after what he shared with her about his past. However, he had given up that control for her when they were in bed, and if she were fair had given it up in a lot of other ways since she dropped back into his life like a meteorite. Now was really just the first time she felt comfortable being direct in this way. "I don't know what you mean." She said with false innocence.

"Of course not." He said as he rolled his eyes.

She laughed lightly and picked a few slices of apples out of the container. "I have to get back to the library. Are we meeting later?"

"I would like to." He said as he handed her one of the water bottles before she could go.

"Me too. I'll cook tonight if you want to stay in." She said with a smile. Right before she turned to go the Dalmatian let out a low whine near her feet and when she looked down he gave her the most adorably pathetic eyes she had ever seen. She completely broke at the stare. "Can he come with me?" She requested.

"He's not mine." Rumple said. "Why are you asking me?"

"Whom does he belong to now?" She asked.

The dog whined again and put his head on her hip, the gaze loosing now of its potency. "I suppose that's up to him, and I rather think it always has been." Rumple replied. "For now he appears to want to go with you."

She scratched at the dog's ears gently. "I could use some company while I dust." She told the dog. "Do you like chicken? I'll make you chicken tonight."

The dog wagged his tail happily and Rumple shook his head. "You'll spoil him inside twenty minutes."

"I like to spoil things." She said down at the dog, rubbing his head when he pressed it against her side. "Especially sweet things that appreciate being spoiled." Rumple smiled as she turned. "Come on, Pogo. You can help me fetch books from the return bin."

The dog barked and wagged his tail excitedly. Pleased, and enjoying having a companion for the afternoon at least, she left with a wave and Rumple watched her fondly as she left. The next few hours were rather fun for her, at least as fun as cleaning could be. She had shut the library down for the afternoon for a proper scrubbing, something she had decided to put on her calendar once a month to be sure it got done, and found Pogo to be a very helpful companion.

As he walked about the library carrying books in his mouth she was once again hit with the impression that he was much smarter than a normal dog and wondered if he was bespelled in some manner. He was able to fetch not only books and bring them to her, but was able to tell which ones she wanted next as she restocked them. The only possible way for him to accomplish that was to be able to read the titles. When she told him how impressed she was he had barked happily and wagged his tail like mad before racing off to get the next book. She suspected this was the first happy time he had since Archie had been killed two days before and didn't try to ruin his good time.

After the books were all put away he surprised her by showing up at her elbow with a dust rag held in his mouth. She rubbed his head and neck for that and he wagged his tail again. "Thank you. I think the rest I'll have to do on my own. Why don't you go lay in the sunshine?" She suggested as she pointed to a patch of light that was coming through the window. The Dalmatian considered that briefly before sneezing to himself and trotting over and laying down, stretching his lean body out over the cool tile floor, his tail wagging happily.

Smiling at him she began to dust the shelves and made quick progress, even after grabbing the footstool to be sure she got the tops as well. That done in good time she went to work on the corners, going all the way up to the ceiling to get the cobwebs. At one point in her life cobwebs had been her greatest enemy. She had never once seen a spider in the dark castle, and yet the place was not only full of cobwebs, they were constantly reappearing. While she suspected most people would be more annoyed with all the magic bouncing about so dangerously she had been irked beyond reckoning at that little quirk of the castle. She had started to suspect it put them there on purpose just so she would have to pay attention to it. It was a magic castle after all, she wouldn't put a trick like that past it. At least here she hadn't had to hunt all over the place for a ladder, and the ceilings weren't thirty feet high. Here if she got to the top of the stool and balanced carefully, putting her about five extra feet up, she could reach the dratted things.

Working her way around the library methodically to be sure she got everything before she swept and mopped she was three quarters done when things went all kinds of wrong. She was dusting at the top of the wall with the pretty metal and wood carving of a tree. She had been fond of the wall since she opened the library. It was lovely, especially now in the afternoon when the sunlight was hitting it and reflecting off the metal tree and stars at the top. She had wondered if it was a representation of something from their old world, but if it was she didn't know what part, and she hadn't read of anything like it. It was really equally as likely that it was simply a whimsical piece of art someone put here as a decoration to please patrons.

Humming a tune under her breath as she worked to pass the time, she dusted with gusto and was about to step down when she spotted a stubborn web. Dusting at it harder did very little to get rid of it as it got stuck in a pointy bit of the metal. Narrowing her eyes she stretched her arm out, teetering on the stool as she grabbed at it. Just as her hand brushed it away she slipped and let out a squeak of dismay. Having fallen enough to know it was going to hurt she lurched toward the wall and back toward the stool to try to center herself again. When her full weight hit the wall there was a groan and the wall slid backward before flying up into the ceiling, disappearing into a secret space carved back into it.

Confused in the split second between the wall moving and her falling toward the hard ground her hands scrapped for purchase. She managed to grab at a bar behind the wall as the stool clattered to the ground below her and she shouted as she swung into the odd doors that were revealed. Flailing, she felt something under one of her feet and tried to put her weight on it so she could stop swinging and land on her feet properly. Unfortunately, her luck got no better as whatever it was snapped down with a kind of kerchunk noise and the doors came open. Thrown off balance again she tried to get a better hold with both hands but lost her grip entirely and swung inside the open doors and out over a dark shaft of some kind. As she fell her head hit the top of the odd doorway and she was immediately dazed by the impact. She had just enough sense left to feel herself impact on the ground at the oddest angle after a very long drop.

The crash not only knocked the breath out of her but she heard a distinct snap in her left arm as all her weight hit it, and pain lanced through her. Before she could even try to regain herself there was a loud grating sound above her as the metal doors shut themselves, cutting off all the light that had been coming in. Cold fear filled her belly as she found herself suddenly trapped and in the dark. Flailing up despite her myriad of new injuries she lunged toward the ceiling, and the way she had come in. "No!" She cried loudly. Clawing at the metal walls she eventually felt a seam but couldn't pry it open, not even when she tried to use her certainly broken arm. Realizing it wasn't budging she shrieked at the top of her lungs, terrified of being in such a confined space. "No! Let me out! No!" She slammed her body into the doors full force, completely forgetting the pain in her panic. She bounced off them again and again as she tried to escape this unexpected prison. "Pogo!"

Flailing about in the total darkness she began to feel her way around frantically as the Dalmatian started to bark above her riotously. Her whole body was shaking like crazy and she couldn't think to do more than try to get out, let alone anything else. The barking increased dramatically and she heard a muffled sound of metal moving again. Unsure of what that meant she looked around as she stood in one of the corners, trying to see something. To her horror the sound was not an omen of freedom, but rather further disaster. All at once the odd box she was in dropped several feet down before jolting to a halt. The abrupt movement had her hitting the ground again and the impact broke had her letting out a scream as her arm was slammed into one of the walls as she hit the ground, landing in an awkward kneeling position.

She heard more barking, briefly, before the box plunged down again. This time it didn't stop and she huddled down into a ball, although she had no idea if that was at all helpful to her situation. She wasn't sure how long the drop went on for this time, but when the box finally came to a halt she was jolted into the wall behind her. When her back slammed into it the seam she had found earlier it came open and she tumbled head over heels out into a much bigger space. Landing on her stomach she lay dazed for a long minute before she could even manage to work out where she was.

When her head stopped spinning enough for her to get her body to do a few things, like breathe and blink, she gathered herself back together, which took several more seconds. Finally, she managed to start thinking again and looked around. Confused, she sat up slowly, cradling her arm to her chest as she did. She found herself in an enormous cavern of some kind and was beyond baffled considering she had been in her library not five minutes ago. Turning her head she saw where she had fallen out of and still didn't understand what had happened, or what the box behind the doors was. However, she decided she would really not enjoy going back in it so she turned her attention to the cave.

Standing up slowly, her mind reeling sickly from her banging it, she took a few stumbling steps forward. It was dark here, but oddly not so much that she couldn't see. It was as if something were lighting the place up enough that it was more like a house at night, shadowed, but negotiable. Ten feet inside her foot sank through something and she looked down. She was standing at the edge of a large pile of ash.

More confused than ever, and deeply afraid Storybrooke was built over a volcano, she kept moving forward until she saw something glinting in the low light. Bending down, and fighting of the nausea that accompanied that movement, her fingers sank down into the ash and curled around something metallic and cool. Frowning, she pulled it up, finding it very heavy, and discovered she was gripping the handle of a broadsword. Taking the weapon in she saw it was finely made, if simple for a knight's blade. Her father had taught her more than she ever needed to know about the weapons, and she could tell it was exceedingly well balanced.

Unfortunately, it also told her something else. It told her someone else had been down here and left a sword. No knight or soldier in their right mind left such a valuable weapon. They either took it with them or died with it. Looking back down at her feet had the ash taking on a whole knew meaning. Her heart jumped to her throat and she gripped the hilt tightly, cursing herself for breaking her dominant arm. Backing to the nearest large rock so her back was to something solid she let the blade rest against her hip as she reached into her pocket. Her hand wrapped around the small phone Rumple had given her and she pulled it out, flipping the top up quickly.

Shaking slightly she took her eyes off the darkness long enough to dial the number he had made her memorize. Lifting the phone to her ear she heard it ring twice before there was a strange fizzing noise and the thing went silent. She cursed under her breath and she shoved the phone away, wondering why he wanted her to have it so badly when the thing didn't work. Letting out a fearful breath she remembered the bracelet all at once and set her hand over it. While she had no particular wish to battle a dragon, she felt she might have been less frightened by the prospect if her arm wasn't broken, and if her head wasn't pounding quite so badly. She knew in this state she had not a chance, if she ever would have had one to begin with.

Feeling the oddly warm metal under her fingers she tried to convey her need as her fear mixed up with the pain. "Rumpelstiltskin!" She hissed urgently. The metal shivered below her and began to coil about around her wrist in a wave, as if it were a hundred diminutive and excited snakes moving in unison. "Rumpelstiltskin! Help!" All at once the bracelet shivered again and then went still. Unsure if that meant it worked or didn't she let out another hiss. "Rumpelstiltskin!"

When there was no response she let out a terrified breath and hurled herself at the wall again as a new wave of panic hit her. Grabbing the sword again she lifted it up and began to creep around the large cavern. She would rather find this beast before it found her if she had to pick, and having no idea if Rumple had heard her call she wasn't about to wait around to be eaten, or burned alive and end up as more ash on the ground.

Trying to be stealthy, which was really not in her repertoire, she crept around one large rocky outcropping after another as she hunted for the serpent. She was forcefully reminded of her fight with the fire beast, and kept reminding herself that she had beat him. If she could do that she could do this too. Trying to calm herself she took one deep breath with every step, slowing her heartbeat and regaining some of her composure. Turning around another rock that was on the edge of a drop off, she was distracted by what appeared to be very large claw marks on the edge. Gulping, she took another step and promptly tripped over something.

She fell hard, managing to stop herself from making more noise than the sound of her body falling over something lumpy and the lumpy thing toppling over as she knocked it akimbo. Clenching her jaw she stayed still, her ears straining for a sign she had been detected, and after a minute assumed she hadn't. Sitting up she looked down to see what she'd fallen over and saw, to her great surprise, piles, and piles, and piles of books. Blinking in utter bafflement she sat there for a moment before getting up. She slipped on the books, sliding over them, until she managed to get back to solid ground.

Squatting down, she tilted her head and saw a title, the gold script gleaming in the low light. Reading it, she let out a low breath as she said it in a whisper. "_Beauty and the Beast_." Somehow, when she pictured the mysterious B-level storage, she hadn't envisioned this.

As she took the unexpected find in there was a soft sound behind her and she reacted. Throwing herself up she whirled around, swinging the blade as hard as she could, her only thought to at least hurt the beast, or surprise it, so she had a chance to run. Rumpelstiltskin let out a curse and a spell flew out of him. She suddenly found herself frozen where she was as he stumbled back out of the way of the blade that was only inches from his neck. She realized as he dropped the spell that she had nearly cut his head off. Thrown off balance yet again when he let the magic drop she was saved from yet another fall when he caught her around the waist to steady her.

"Belle, are you-"

"Shh!" She hissed in alarm. "We're in a dragon's den!"

Rumple frowned and looked around quickly. It occurred to her he had no idea where he was and must have simply teleported himself to wherever she had called from without really knowing what he was getting into. It must have taken him time to find her because she had moved away from the spot she had called from in her effort to find the dragon. "Where are we?"

"Under the library." She whispered.

He calmed noticeably. "You can relax, dearie." He told her at a normal volume. "The dragon's long gone."

"What?"

He took the sword from her carefully, clearly pleased to see it. She had a feeling he couldn't see very well in the dark or he would have already started to heal her with that frantic panic that always came over him when she was in danger. "And you've found one of my keepsakes. That was thoughtful."

"There's not a dragon?" She asked warily.

"Not anymore." He assured her as he looked the blade over for damage. "Miss Swan killed it some time ago now. The same night you found me in fact."

She felt much better considering the circumstances. "How did a dragon get here to begin with?"

"The same way the rest of us did." He supplied. "Regina's curse. She was as kind to her friends as she was to her enemies."

"What is that supposed to mean?" She asked.

He gazed around the large cavern again. "A story for another day I think. How did you get down here?"

She told him. "There was a strange box that came down here."

He frowned. "You mean the elevator?"

"What's an elevator?" She asked. "And you told me you didn't know where B-level storage was." She admitted there was more than a bit of accusation in her tone.

"Storage?" He asked, spotting the books when she kicked at them lightly. He sighed. "I suppose that's one way to keep a dragon occupied." He said half to himself. "I didn't know this was where the books were, dearie. I sealed this place up so no one would get stuck in here before I gave you the key to the library. How exactly did you get in the elevator?" He clarified quickly. "The box."

"I fell down the shaft into it." She said, and having said it, all the pain from that fall crashed down on her. "I think I'd like to sit down now seeing as I don't have to slay a dragon."

"You fell?" He asked. "What do you mean you fell?"

Seeing nowhere very convenient to sit she began to sway. "I'd really like to sit down, Rumple." And with that her head gave a powerful throb and let her legs do whatever they deemed fit, which seemed to mean folding in on themselves. Rumpelstiltskin let out a curse as she started to fall and lunged after her. How he caught her before she impacted the ground with his leg the way it was would forever remain a mystery, mostly because when he caught her he jostled her arm and that was all she could really take notice of. She let out a muffled scream as his arm clamped over hers and he nearly dropped her as she dangled from his arms. Instead, there was a blast of purple magic and then they were back in the lobby of the library.

He let her sink to the floor quickly and she saw the blatant anxiety in his face now that he could see her. "Belle?" He was on the floor next to her in an instant as Pogo spotted them and raced over agitatedly, circling them over and over again as he whined unhappily. Rumpelstiltskin cupped her face and looked at her forehead, his eyes trailing up into her hair, ignoring the dog. "You're covered in blood!"

"I imagine so." She agreed. "You didn't bring the books up with us."

He was torn between exasperation and fear. "I think they can wait a few moments." He said with distracted sarcasm. Lifting his hand he set his palm over the center of her head wound and she felt heat seep into her. A few moments later the pain was gone and she felt much better. She let out a breath of relief and he took his hand away. "Are you hurt anywhere else?"

"I broke my arm." She told him. "It didn't make a very good cushion to be honest." He put his hand over it when she indicated which one and ran his fingers from her shoulder to her wrist slowly, his magic following the motion. A minute later and her arm felt as good as new and she let out a breath of relief as she stretched it out. "Thank you."

Pulling her to him he kissed her forehead as his arms went around her. "I can't leave you alone for ten minutes." He said with fond relief. "Are you all right?"

"I think so." She said, and really she felt much better now that he healed her and she was back out of that horrible box. Tilting her head up she kissed him warmly. Reaching up he cupped her face and when she pulled away she watched him with something close to wonder. "You came to save me." No one had ever come to save her before. Well, Jefferson had, but that had been much less about her than his daughter. She didn't really categorized her release with rescue since it had really been about something other than her freedom and well being.

He stroked her cheek with a feather light touch. "You called for me."

She pressed closer to him, pointing out the obvious. "You rescued me."

"I'm not sure getting you out of an empty cave with an exit really counts as rescuing." He said with a small, self-deprecating smile.

"But you didn't know where we were." She pointed out as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders. "And you still came. Anything could have been happening. It was brave."

He tucked her hair behind her ear. "I'm simply too big a coward to live without you, dearie."

She would not be swayed. "It was brave." She told him. "You were brave and came to rescue me." Heat was starting to build up in her as she pressed up against him. While she might fully endorse saving oneself whenever possible it did make her feel quite important to be rescued by someone else. Pogo seemed to have sensed the shift in the room because he shook his head and trotted out of the line of sight quickly. She ignored that the dog was modest, and that it was rather odd that he should be.

He took her in, his arm wrapping more firmly around her middle as she pressed up against him. "I suppose-" She kissed him hard and he hummed as she nearly knocked him to his back over the floor. He gathered her against him and she crawled into his lap to make it easier for him to hold her. When he finally tore himself from her he panted. "You realize the door is unlocked all the windows are open?"

Taken slightly aback by this information she blushed badly as she looked over at them. However, she wasn't so bothered that the heat died down and she came up with an easy solution. Kissing him again she got off him and pulled him to his feet. He had just enough time to grab his cane before she was dragging him to the door that led to her apartment. He had a look of stupefied shock on his face for a split second before he smirked and followed after her eagerly. Right before she opened the door he spun her around and kissed her warmly before spinning her back and opening the door for her. Laughing in delight she led him up the stairs after her. She didn't get much cleaning done for the rest of the afternoon, but wasn't overly upset by the lack of progress.

Author's Note: See? I'm still here! But seriously, I've been trying to tweak the story around the show so it fits properly, which is rather harder than it sounds when my storyline had been headed in a slightly different direction. But anyway, hope you enjoyed it! I'll have another chapter up as soon as I can get to it.


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